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I think I'm losing my friends


umi
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Me and my group of friends always were very close, and I had a friend inside of that group that I really connected with.  A couple weeks ago, i was really strugling with mental health (still kinda am, but thats not the point), and did something bad (directly unrelated to that friend) and she got mad at me and stopped talking to me. I apologised, but she is kind of proud and still doesn't speak to me. That really hurts me, and cause we used to be all together, i have found very hard being with my group of friends, bacause she is always there, and they are giving her attention and laughing with her, and I try to speak and be with my friends, but I really feel left out. 
The other day, i went out to eat with one of my friends from said friend group, and i told her everything, and told her I wasn't okay, and that I was trying but i can't be there, cause i find it very hard just ignoring the fact that she's there. It was a good lunch, but I am still struggling, and as the days go by I just feel more left out, I feel like they don't care about me, and it really looks like they are taking her side and not giving a damn about me. I am quite introverted to meet people, and I dont have other friends, I just feel very badly and left out. 

does someone has any advice?

Edited by umi
i hadn't finished
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1 minute ago, umi said:

Me and my group of friends always were very close, and I had a friend inside of that group that I really connected with.  AS

Hello, hope your well, may I ask why you think your loosinf your friends? Your voice is important so keep reaching out, to support you best I'd like to know a little big more to understand your situation,  big hugs.

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5 minutes ago, TransGurllll said:

Hello, hope your well, may I ask why you think your loosinf your friends? Your voice is important so keep reaching out, to support you best I'd like to know a little big more to understand your situation,  big hugs.

hey, thank you ! i hadn't finished writing and i posted it accidently. I know edited it, there's the whole story.

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10 minutes ago, umi said:

Me and my group of friends always were very close, and I had a friend inside of that group that I really connected with.  A couple weeks ago, i was really strugling with mental health (still kinda am, but thats not the point), and did something bad (directly unrelated to that friend) and she got mad at me and stopped talking to me. I apologised, but she is kind of proud and still doesn't speak to me. That really hurts me, and cause we used to be all together, i have found very hard being with my group of friends, bacause she is always there, and they are giving her attention and laughing with her, and I try to speak and be with my friends, but I really feel left out. 
The other day, i went out to eat with one of my friends from said friend group, and i told her everything, and told her I wasn't okay, and that I was trying but i can't be there, cause i find it very hard just ignoring the fact that she's there. It was a good lunch, but I am still struggling, and as the days go by I just feel more left out, I feel like they don't care about me, and it really looks like they are taking her side and not giving a damn about me. I am quite introverted to meet people, and I dont have other friends, I just feel very badly and left out. 

does someone has any advice?

Hey, so sorry to hear that, firstly, have you spoken to someone about this? Have you heard of writing your emotions down to get rid of sad feelings? I am sorry to hear things have not been great with your friend, well done for apologising that is such a massive thing to do so well done you, is there another group of friends you can  hang around with? Her getting attention seems like it hurts you, and that can be so tough, Are you at school? If so, maybe talk to a close teacher that you feel really low and that you just need someone to off load to, then maybe you'll feel a little better. Are you struggling with your mental health from it all or just the friends?

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1 minute ago, TransGurllll said:

Hey, so sorry to hear that, firstly, have you spoken to someone about this? Have you heard of writing your emotions down to get rid of sad feelings? I am sorry to hear things have not been great with your friend, well done for apologising that is such a massive thing to do so well done you, is there another group of friends you can  hang around with? Her getting attention seems like it hurts you, and that can be so tough, Are you at school? If so, maybe talk to a close teacher that you feel really low and that you just need someone to off load to, then maybe you'll feel a little better. Are you struggling with your mental health from it all or just the friends?

Hey, firstly, thank you so much for caring, it really mean a lot
I have tried to be mature and speak to the friend I went out to lunch, but I'm not sure if she cares anymore, and I spoke to my bf, he has been supporting me and hanging out with me, which has made things a bit better.
Yes, I have heard of writing things dopwn, that's why I made this post, but that's a good idea, I'll try doing it :))
Hmmm, I have been hanging out with my bf, and I'm trying to connect with the people I recently met in my class. Yes, I'm in school, it's the last year
Talking with my teacher is acctually a great idea, thank you, I'll try doing that, although it's not very common in my country to talk about personal stuff with teachers.
I'm struggling with it from everything, yes

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25 minutes ago, umi said:

Hey, firstly, thank you so much for caring, it really mean a lot
I have tried to be mature and speak to the friend I went out to lunch, but I'm not sure if she cares anymore, and I spoke to my bf, he has been supporting me and hanging out with me, which has made things a bit better.
Yes, I have heard of writing things dopwn, that's why I made this post, but that's a good idea, I'll try doing it :))
Hmmm, I have been hanging out with my bf, and I'm trying to connect with the people I recently met in my class. Yes, I'm in school, it's the last year
Talking with my teacher is acctually a great idea, thank you, I'll try doing that, although it's not very common in my country to talk about personal stuff with teachers.
I'm struggling with it from everything, yes

Thank you for telling me,  that's good you have tour boyfriend, is he supportive?  Talking to a teacher helps so many ways, it sounds silly but they can help !!

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4 minutes ago, TransGurllll said:

Thank you for telling me,  that's good you have tour boyfriend, is he supportive?  Talking to a teacher helps so many ways, it sounds silly but they can help !!

yes he is, thank you so much for your help and listening 

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  • Digital Mentor
2 hours ago, umi said:

Me and my group of friends always were very close, and I had a friend inside of that group that I really connected with.  A couple weeks ago, i was really strugling with mental health (still kinda am, but thats not the point), and did something bad (directly unrelated to that friend) and she got mad at me and stopped talking to me. I apologised, but she is kind of proud and still doesn't speak to me. That really hurts me, and cause we used to be all together, i have found very hard being with my group of friends, bacause she is always there, and they are giving her attention and laughing with her, and I try to speak and be with my friends, but I really feel left out. 
The other day, i went out to eat with one of my friends from said friend group, and i told her everything, and told her I wasn't okay, and that I was trying but i can't be there, cause i find it very hard just ignoring the fact that she's there. It was a good lunch, but I am still struggling, and as the days go by I just feel more left out, I feel like they don't care about me, and it really looks like they are taking her side and not giving a damn about me. I am quite introverted to meet people, and I dont have other friends, I just feel very badly and left out. 

does someone has any advice?

Hey @umi

Welcome to our community. I can see that TransGurllll has given you lots of advice; how are you feeling about the situation now you've spoken a bit about it here? Do you have any thoughts about what you might do next? 

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

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29 minutes ago, Monsoon said:

Hey @umi

Welcome to our community. I can see that TransGurllll has given you lots of advice; how are you feeling about the situation now you've spoken a bit about it here? Do you have any thoughts about what you might do next? 

Hello! Thank you for replying
I feel a little bit better, I don't have much self esteem (working on it), so I was feeling veryu doubtful if they didn't like me because of who I am, or if I was a bad person, but @TransGurllll made me feel like that was just in my head, without even noticing it.
I'm not sure about what to do next, probably follow the advice and talk to a teacher, and probably not waste my time on people who don't care for me as much as I care for them? I can't tell if that's selfish, but maybe meeting other people could be a good idea.

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15 minutes ago, umi said:

Hello! Thank you for replying
I feel a little bit better, I don't have much self esteem (working on it), so I was feeling veryu doubtful if they didn't like me because of who I am, or if I was a bad person, but @TransGurllll made me feel like that was just in my head, without even noticing it.
I'm not sure about what to do next, probably follow the advice and talk to a teacher, and probably not waste my time on people who don't care for me as much as I care for them? I can't tell if that's selfish, but maybe meeting other people could be a good idea.

Hello, how are you doing now?  It can take time learning and taking to time to build your self esteem, does that make sense? They will show if they don't like you, WE like you! I'll support you :) just tag me, because I care about you!!!!! 

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14 hours ago, umi said:

Hello! Thank you for replying
I feel a little bit better, I don't have much self esteem (working on it), so I was feeling veryu doubtful if they didn't like me because of who I am, or if I was a bad person, but @TransGurllll made me feel like that was just in my head, without even noticing it.
I'm not sure about what to do next, probably follow the advice and talk to a teacher, and probably not waste my time on people who don't care for me as much as I care for them? I can't tell if that's selfish, but maybe meeting other people could be a good idea.

Hey there,

I really like the ideas that you've come up with, and I think they will be really great for you. I don't see it as selfish at all; it's hard to navigate a relationship when it isn't equal in that way, so I completely get it. Also, would you like to share with us what you're doing to help your self-esteem? 

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

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1 minute ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I really like the ideas that you've come up with, and I think they will be really great for you. I don't see it as selfish at all; it's hard to navigate a relationship when it isn't equal in that way, so I completely get it. Also, would you like to share with us what you're doing to help your self-esteem? 

Lovely comment ! 

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16 hours ago, TransGurllll said:

Hello, how are you doing now?  It can take time learning and taking to time to build your self esteem, does that make sense? They will show if they don't like you, WE like you! I'll support you :) just tag me, because I care about you!!!!! 

you fill my hearth with joy <33333

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2 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I really like the ideas that you've come up with, and I think they will be really great for you. I don't see it as selfish at all; it's hard to navigate a relationship when it isn't equal in that way, so I completely get it. Also, would you like to share with us what you're doing to help your self-esteem? 

heyy, thank you!

I'm trying hard to control my bad thoughts and doubts, and I'm trying to take a little bit of time everyday to do something that I engoy and makes me happy. :))

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44 minutes ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

Yeah, I really like the idea of taking a little bit of time everyday to do something that you enjoy. What kinds of things are you enjoying doing at the moment? :)

Hey!!

I like arsy stuff, like drawing, painting, doing little clay work, e.t.c.. I also enjoy reading or watching videos/series. Thank u for asking :)

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5 hours ago, umi said:

Hey!!

I like arsy stuff, like drawing, painting, doing little clay work, e.t.c.. I also enjoy reading or watching videos/series. Thank u for asking :)

Hey,

That's great to hear - thanks for sharing :) 

Would you like support for anything from us at the moment? 

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

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3 minutes ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

That's great to hear - thanks for sharing :) 

Would you like support for anything from us at the moment? 

Hey, I would just like to share a little update.

I found out that they went out yesterday night without even telling me or anything and today I called one of my friends to know how she was and she was "ah yes we are hanging out in another city" and she kind of lead me thinking "we" was she and her family and then she said "okay bye" and hung up. Later today I found out she was with my other "friends", again they didn't invite me or told me... 😔😔

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