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I have no trusted adults or friends, and my parents are homophobic


HowToBreakTheSun Β  Β 

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Hi! I'm Katie, and I am a lesbian. I really want to tell my parents, they keep pushing me to date guys. I have teachers at my school, but can I trust them? I don't have any friends, and I just really need to tell them. The problem? They're homophobic. I can't go to live with any relatives, they all live in Russia or Mexico. So, what should I do?Β 

Thanks!Β 

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Hi Katie,

First of all, thank you for reaching out, it takes courage no matter if it's online or in-person, especially if you haven't come out yet. If your school is big, there is most likely some queers in your same situation. Not sure if that's a comfort to you or not. The most important thing is your emotional well being, so if you know your parents are going to react badly then DO NOT COME OUT to them. Their rejection might push you to the edge (like mine did) if you already struggle with mental health issues or you're honestly just looking for a supporting person who isn't a stranger online. If you don't have any way to find out if your teachers are trustworthy, then asking them subtle questions might help. For example, I check to see if someone's homophobic or not by seeing what their clothing style is. If they are wearing some kind of flannel, or have funky jewlery that is most definitely homemade, they might be queer. Ofc, look for the rainbows!

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15 hours ago, Katie Miller said:

Hi! I'm Katie, and I am a lesbian. I really want to tell my parents, they keep pushing me to date guys. I have teachers at my school, but can I trust them? I don't have any friends, and I just really need to tell them. The problem? They're homophobic. I can't go to live with any relatives, they all live in Russia or Mexico. So, what should I do?Β 

Thanks!Β 

Hey Katie,

Welcome to our community. How are you feeling? I can imagine that you might be feeling overwhelmed and stressed about this at the moment, and I just want you to know that we are here for you. I'm wondering, with coming out, do you feel ready to tell them? I know you said you want to, but I guess there's a difference between wanting and feeling ready. What do you think?Β 

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Thanks guys! I want to, but after a lot of thought, I don't think I'm emotionally ready. There is one girl at my school whose is also a lesbian, but she acts to cool to care about anything.Β 

I just want to say thanks again!

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