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Friendship problem


PK27
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Hi, I am a college student, and when things were knew, when we didn't know each other, our college teacher made a group of 5 people, who were active in class in the beginning, the group included me. So I got close to this girl, we used to talk, but we didn't really know eachother as we had never met. Also I was kinda extrovert back then, now I guess I am not. So as time passed, I started feeling fake, with the group, I felt this is not me. I changed also, and I found new friends, with whom I connected more, related more and who were better for my mental health. And during this course of time, shit happened in my previous group and I got detached, but I was still connected with the girl I got close with, but then I realised that she was only good with me, otherwise she was not a good human being, she was fake, jealous and very competitive. But she stood for me, always. And lately, as we haven't been talking, like completely, neither of us text. But recently, as I got more marks in a college test, with my new group of friends, she kinda approached me. Now the issue is, I feel the friendship is done, it kinda feels toxic now, also she is not good with my new friends. And I am a overthinker, and I feel guilty about little things. So now, even when I am sure that I dont want that friendship, it still somehow makes me overthink that what if I am being a bad human being. See I know, I cant be a good person in everyones story, but I just get this doubt that am I doing bad to her. I know she has been there for me, and I have been there for her too, but then I guess how you treat others matter as well. So any suggestions what should I do ? And I guess we both know that friendship is done. Please help.

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Hey PK27

Welcome 🙂

I honestly completely get what you are saying. Although this person has been good to you, that doesn't mean that you have to be friends with them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you don't owe it to them just because they were good with you. As you've said, the friendship is done and feels kind of toxic. It's  healthy to set your boundary and you are perfectly within your rights to do this. I'm wondering, could you just keep her at a distance rather than hanging out with her? It's fine to still be polite and friendly without being friends. What do you reckon?

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