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  1. When I first started questioning my sexuality, I was 13, and felt very alone. I was too scared to tell anyone, not necessarily because I would face homophobia, but more because I was so worried that it was just a phase. I worried that I was only questioning because I had lots of gay friends, I was worried that I didn't have enough "evidence" to qualify for any label other than straight, and I was worried that people wouldn't believe me, and would think I was just attention seeking. And for a long time, I thought this was just me.That was until I found the Ditch the Label forum. After reading some of the chat forums and seeing how similar my thoughts were to others in similar situations, I realised that my crisis wasn't unusual, but rather something that a lot of young people go through. What I've learnt is that you don't need hard evidence to be a valid part of the LGBTQ+ community. You don't need to prove your feelings or attraction to anyone. On my way to accepting myself, I had to realise that both possible outcomes were okay; it would be okay if it WAS just a phase, and I turned out straight, and it would also be 100% okay if it wasn't a phase, and I really was bisexual. I eventually came to the realisation that I am bisexual (I realised that straight girls probably don't lie awake at night thinking about kissing other girls lol). Something that made me doubt my sexuality for such a long time was the fact that I couldn't really remember ever having been attracted to girls when I was younger. In a lot of stories I've heard of people realising their same sex attraction, people look back and realise that a friend that they were really close to as a kid...they maybe liked more than just a friend. But I didn't have any of that. This bothered me a lot until I realised that bisexuality can be as simple as realising your potential to be in a relationship with multiple genders. For me, I grew up in a very catholic family/school and didn't even know what the word lesbian was until I moved up to secondary school. I didn't know of any same sex relationships in my widespread family or in the media, I was not exposed to any representation at all. The option of being with a girl wasn't even open to me; I was taught that girls could only have platonic relationships with each other. So, moving to an all girls secondary school, and having lots of gay friends opened this option up to me, and I realised that I had the potential inside of me to be with any gender. I didn't have a moment when I was suddenly attracted to women, I just realised that I knew I had that potential (which stressed me out so much because I thought it didn't count).Everyone's experience is different and sexuality is FLUID. Maybe, like me, for you it was something that came when you were older. Maybe you can look back in your childhood and see examples of when you were attracted to the same gender that you didn't realise at a time. Both are valid! And you don't need to label your sexuality either, if you don't want to. That's okay too! It's all okay. You are valid :) <3
  2. I am 17(girl) and i have been confused about sexuallity. Till now , i have only dated guys and i have boyfriend too but i want to know my sexuallity. When i was 15 , i was attracted to a girl but i didn't knew that she was girl cuz she looked like guy , i don't know if i was attracted toward her cuz she looked like a guy. I also get turned on from lesbian porn rather than straight porn. I can also fantasize having sex with a girl and dating her and have no problem to marry her. Also i have been sexually attracted toward female's body . i am so confused , just someone help me .
  3. I am 17(girl) and i have been confused about sexuallity. Till now , i have only dated guys and i have boyfriend too but i want to know my sexuallity. When i was 15 , i was attracted to a girl but i didn't knew that she was girl cuz she looked like guy , i don't know if i was attracted toward her cuz she looked like a guy. I also get turned on from lesbian porn rather than straight porn. I can also fantasize having sex with a girl and dating her and have no problem to marry her. Also i have been sexually attracted toward female's body . i am so confused , just someone help me .
  4. sflowergirl

    am I bi?

    a couple days ago I was watching this movie and I couldn't help but be attracted to the girl main character... After finishing the movie (which was really good) I decided that I was going to take a bisexual quiz. I had been battling myself on this and I didn't and still don't really know why I did but I did. So after watching the movie just did it. The test results showed that I was Bi and I read the little article down below and things started making since. it was like I was seeing the world for the first time even though I had been living in it for a long time. An now a few days later still seeing the world with fresh eyes I feel like I am going screw up my life and make thing awkward with the people around me. so after lift a burning question off my chest I have now replaced it with a twenty pound weight on my shoulders.
  5. I'm so done with my stupid homophobic classmates and town. Most of the teachers/admin at my school are religious/homophobic and so are a lot of the students. I've been harrased on and off for my sexual orientation since 7th grade (which was also the year I was sexually assaulted by a classmate) and a lot of the student population at my school thinks I'm gay even though I'm bisexual. I'm a boy and I did come out to some of my classmates as bi in 10th grade but it was a mistake because now I am in 12th grade and now many people think I'm gay. Many want nothing to do with me because of it and it's made it difficult to date people of both sexes plus I'm autistic and am very socially awkward which often exacerbates the problem. You know the movie Forrest Gump and the scene where Jenny said she wanted to be a bird and fly away? That's how I feel like all the time now. I hate living with my parents who are often emotionally cold towards me and one of my best friend's friend because he asked me out to prom last year and he kissed me while we were there. I felt so HAPPY that I was gonna experience what being with a boy was like but he ditched me after two days. The song hot and cold really describes the way he acts towards me and I am about ready to flip out towards him because it's been going on for months now. I just want my senior year to be a happy one but I don't think that will happen especially if I get a job. I just want someone to genuinely fall in love with me not fake it or pretend they like me but use it to bully me for daring to want to love someone. I'm tried of everyone's crap and I feel about ready to explode.
  6. In year 6 the word gay was taboo, it was whispered like it was dirty, a naughty word that should not be repeated. It didn't help that our teacher taught us nothing about sexuality, I thought that something was wrong with me every time I stared at that one girl in my class. I was finally in the popular crowd though, after moving schools and being bullied, I was finally one of those girls that everyone wishes to be. I wasn't bad looking and I was often told of guys that liked me, which was very flattering, especially when you're at a young age. At the end of year 6 one of my 'friends' was pestering me so much about who did I have a crush on that I just randomly blurted out the name of a guy in our class. Now looking back at my class photo I can see he wasn't year 6 fantasy material. Still to this day, 4 years later, I am teased. It's funny though, I laugh about it with my friends. If you would like to hear more stories about my realisation that I am indeed not straight, comment and I will post one tomorrow night about year 7.
  7. After a full year of contemplating and getting to know myself, I am a proud bisexual. My close friends know, but my family doesn't (my friends are like my found family. I'm a lot more close and comfortable with them). I want to come out to my family because keeping this from them is so stressful! But I'm worried about their reactions... I don't want to say they're homophobic, but their reactions to topics about the LGBTQ+ community don't always go well... My siblings, are.... Homophobic, yeah. They make rude jokes about the LGBTQ+ community so I don't know if I want to tell them. My mother, bless her, says she would support me if I came out (I am her daughter after all) but she always looks grossed out or like she's going to throw up when I talk about girls dating girls or guys dating guys. I can tell she doesn't mean to be rude, so I do want her to know, but I'm scared as to what her reaction might be... Thoughts?
  8. Ok this is weird but like 5 years ago I thought "I think I like girls too" because I was starting to get a crush on a girl (I still liked guys too) but then I was like "nah that's a problem for another day" and I didn't think about it for five years even though I knew I had a crush on a girl and now I just realised that I procrastinated realising my own sexuality
  9. I don't know if this is official but people have been making sexualities that mock the LGBTQIA+ community like people have been making flags supporting messed-up sexualities like Pedosexual and other gross stuff like that. Like we're all about equality and supporting people and loving who you want but pedophilia shouldn't be a valid thing- (Btw I support everyone in the LGBTQIA+ community you're all amazing and I support everyone just not pedos)
  10. Do you ever feel like every day people put you in a box based on who they think you should be? It's not like I think I'm the only one or anything, but every day I feel trapped inside that box and I cant move an inch without scrutiny. It's not like I can come out to anyone, because I'm still figuring things out and my mom is homophobic. The shi**y thing about this is that I feel like everyone is so focused on what I should be...especially when I dont act like it. Especially when the conversation turns to a future partner and I just wanna tell people the truth but I cant because I cant live five more years of my life knowing no one will see me for who I am, no matter what I identity as. It's always a label like boy or girl or nonbinary. Lesbian or gay or... WHATEVER but cant we just move beyond those things and just accept people as people... I would say more but I think I said enough for one night. Sorry for the length I will hopefully do better next time
  11. umi

    Choosing an enby name

    Hey everyone! I'm non-binary (genderfluid), and I am thinking about changing my name, because it's a very "feminine" name, at least in my country. I can't change it to a name of my language, because we don't have gender neutral names (sadly, i even checked lists and e.t.c.), so I will probably use a foreign name anyways. Does anyone have any cool name ideas, or any tip to find a good name that fits you? Note: in my country, it is not currently possible to officialy change ones name, only if you are trans MTF or FTM; so the name I would choose wouldn't be "eternal", it will only be used by my friends and close people. Have a nice day ^^
  12. Hi, Ive read your book and i’ve really been enjoying it. When i found out about this website i was super excited and wanted to check it out. i’ve been struggling with my gender a lot recently, and it’s been very overwhelming since i’ve just been starting secondary school. i know i’m young so i’m not really expected to be thinking about my gender or experimenting with it, but ever since i have been i’ve been super confused and anxious. i think im genderfluid but im also not sure. i came out to my parents as transgender (mtf) and im not to sure how they felt about it. ive recently got my period and it’s made me feel super bad about my body. im also developing boobs which i am not happy about. i know i don’t have to have a label just yet but i don’t like not knowing how i feel. it makes me feel very anxious and stressed about my body. can you give please me some advice?
  13. Hey everyone! I'm new here, don't know how it works, but i'm gonna give it a try. Im genderfluid, AFAB (assigned female at birth), and my pronouns change. I want to come out to my cisgender straight boyfriend, who doesn't know much about genders and pronouns, He was supportive when i came out as bisexual, but i'm not sure if he will be okay with this and i don't know how to tell him. My lgbt friend told me to not rush it and take my time, but sometimes i feel more enby or even masculine, and everytime he uses she/her pronouns i feel like trowing up (in my native language, we don't have neutral pronouns and use feminine and masculine for almost every word). I don't know what to do, if anyone has any advice, I'm all ears.
  14. my parents are christvhans, how do i come out????
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