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Emberfrost12
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This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Self-Harm

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So, everything kind of took over earlier today, and I couldn't concentrate because my subconsciousness, or my other consciousness,Β  was telling me that i was messing up, and one of my teachers got slightly annoyed at me (for being on my phone, when i was doing a survey FOR school), and my other consciousness pounced on that and it was out of control so I ended up having to self-harm to ground myself and focus.

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10 minutes ago, Emberfrost12 said:

So, everything kind of took over earlier today, and I couldn't concentrate because my subconsciousness, or my other consciousness,Β  was telling me that i was messing up, and one of my teachers got slightly annoyed at me (for being on my phone, when i was doing a survey FOR school), and my other consciousness pounced on that and it was out of control so I ended up having to self-harm to ground myself and focus.

Hey @Emberfrost12Β I've been through exactly the same thing but self harm is Never the answer.

@Monsoon could you please offer some advice on this situation?

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1 minute ago, TheOriginalAxel said:

Hey @Emberfrost12Β I've been through exactly the same thing but self harm is Never the answer.

@Monsoon could you please offer some advice on this situation?

I know but there was nothing else I could do, and it mostly worked, i just couldn't deal with one part of my brain telling me i'm worthless, another trying to show me how i could accidentally kill all my friends in a car crash, and yet another telling me that i made a massive mistake and should just cry or throw something.

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3 minutes ago, TheOriginalAxel said:

Hey @Emberfrost12Β I've been through exactly the same thing but self harm is Never the answer.

@Monsoon could you please offer some advice on this situation?

It hid my reply

I think monsoon's away

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2 minutes ago, Emberfrost12 said:

It hid my reply

I think monsoon's away

He commented on a topic that I'm following quite recently but idk.

Maybe @BlondieΒ or @Harper could help

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Just now, TheOriginalAxel said:

He commented on a topic that I'm following quite recently but idk.

Maybe @BlondieΒ or @Harper could help

I saw that, but his away status just got set. Who knows.

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Just now, TheOriginalAxel said:

He commented on a topic that I'm following quite recently but idk.

Maybe @BlondieΒ or @Harper could help

There are two newer ones, @AuroraΒ and @Luie, as well.

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1 minute ago, Emberfrost12 said:

There are two newer ones, @AuroraΒ and @Luie, as well.

Well hopefully we can get you the support and advice that you need.

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Just now, TheOriginalAxel said:

Well hopefully we can get you the support and advice that you need.

Yep. Worst part about it is that even though i know i'm crashing, I feel perfectly fine.

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1 minute ago, Emberfrost12 said:

Anyway, i'll be around later I should proooobably get back to class work

If it's making you feel like this, ask your teacher if you cam step out of the class for a bit

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2 minutes ago, Emberfrost12 said:

Anyway, i'll be around later I should proooobably get back to class work

Never mind the drill presses are all being used :(Β 

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Just now, Emberfrost12 said:

Never mind the drill presses are all being used :(Β 

I'm guessing it's woodwork or carpentry

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1 minute ago, Emberfrost12 said:

Yep :) I'm making another cat

You're obsessed. I swear it.

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Just now, TheOriginalAxel said:

You're obsessed. I swear it.

I've only made two!!!!!!!!Β 

(But i wood make more if i had time)

(Get it? Wood?)

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2 minutes ago, Emberfrost12 said:

I've only made two!!!!!!!!Β 

(But i wood make more if i had time)

(Get it? Wood?)

😬😬😬

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Just now, Emberfrost12 said:

Anyway, we're getting off topic

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood

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1 minute ago, TheOriginalAxel said:

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood

A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood

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1 minute ago, Emberfrost12 said:

A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood

A wood chuck would chuck about 700lbs of wood on a good day with the wind at his back. Or at least that's what my Alexa told me last week

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Just now, TheOriginalAxel said:

A wood chuck would chuck about 700lbs of wood on a good day with the wind at his back. Or at least that's what my Alexa told me last week

LMAO

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This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Self-Harm

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13 hours ago, Emberfrost12 said:

So, everything kind of took over earlier today, and I couldn't concentrate because my subconsciousness, or my other consciousness,Β  was telling me that i was messing up, and one of my teachers got slightly annoyed at me (for being on my phone, when i was doing a survey FOR school), and my other consciousness pounced on that and it was out of control so I ended up having to self-harm to ground myself and focus.

Hey there, how are you doing today?

Were you able to tell the teacher that you were doing school work? I can imagine how frustrating Β this must have been.

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This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Self-Harm

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9 hours ago, Blondie said:

Hey there, how are you doing today?

Were you able to tell the teacher that you were doing school work? I can imagine how frustrating Β this must have been.

Today was a ton better.

She would've said it didn't matter and I didn't want to escalate that conversation

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This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Self-Harm

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12 minutes ago, Emberfrost12 said:

Today was a ton better.

She would've said it didn't matter and I didn't want to escalate that conversation

But while it was better, it still wasn't great. I just want to give in, I know i don't have the strength to fight everything off, and i'm going to have to give in. The question is, how long do i try? Do I give in now and make it easier on myself, or do I keep fighting and give in when there's no other option? It's that or I become a different person who doesn't have these problems, and has a purpose, or I just stay myself and go nowhere in life. I know it's kind of weird, because I should want to be living just for the sake of living, but really, I need something to live FOR and I don't know what that is.

Also i've always had this strange idea that my body is not my own, which could be from dysphoria, or it could not, but for some reason I feel like my subconsciousness is another person who's just given up on taking my body back and just wants to help me, if that makes any sense? And part of the idea of getting rid of my personality/becoming neutral is that it would give my subconsciousness an opportunity to take my body back? I know it doesn't make any sense, but that's what i've been thinking. Idk

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