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Need help with maybe coming out...


Saori23    

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Hi I need help coming out as you saw in the title (tbh I dont why I'm including that here ig I just don't know how else to start this, im sorry). Anyways I've been so frustrated lately because well last year I for the first time realized that I was bisexual mostly because I didn't know that that was a thing I thought that you either loved guys or girls no matter what your gender is, period. But then I started hearing about the owl house from someone at my school and well yeah... and then little by little I came out to my friends and even some family members who I really trust. Here's the thing though I dont hide stuff from my dad... except for this... and at first it didn't really bother me like at all it wasn't on my mind... but lately it's just been eating me alive every second I'm awake, I mean all I need is to have dreams/nightmares about it for it to be an all consuming thought.... like yesterday I was really bored and decided to watch Wonder Woman and he joined me and in the scene where Steve is talking about not sleeping with Diana on the boat he was jokingly raising his hand and saying that he volunteered and I just had the strongest urge to just tag along and say "same" and there's been so many interactions like that that I could present but I wont bother you with it.The point is that I am not even sure if he'd be ok with it and/or wouldn't care or if he would because by now it just seems so obvious with every hint i've been leaving  so maybe hes suspicious but then again he can be really oblivious so I don't even know what to do... so I would appreciate it if you guys could help even if it's just a tiny bit... thank you for your time btw..!

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1 hour ago, Saori23 said:

Hi I need help coming out as you saw in the title (tbh I dont why I'm including that here ig I just don't know how else to start this, im sorry). Anyways I've been so frustrated lately because well last year I for the first time realized that I was bisexual mostly because I didn't know that that was a thing I thought that you either loved guys or girls no matter what your gender is, period. But then I started hearing about the owl house from someone at my school and well yeah... and then little by little I came out to my friends and even some family members who I really trust. Here's the thing though I dont hide stuff from my dad... except for this... and at first it didn't really bother me like at all it wasn't on my mind... but lately it's just been eating me alive every second I'm awake, I mean all I need is to have dreams/nightmares about it for it to be an all consuming thought.... like yesterday I was really bored and decided to watch Wonder Woman and he joined me and in the scene where Steve is talking about not sleeping with Diana on the boat he was jokingly raising his hand and saying that he volunteered and I just had the strongest urge to just tag along and say "same" and there's been so many interactions like that that I could present but I wont bother you with it.The point is that I am not even sure if he'd be ok with it and/or wouldn't care or if he would because by now it just seems so obvious with every hint i've been leaving  so maybe hes suspicious but then again he can be really oblivious so I don't even know what to do... so I would appreciate it if you guys could help even if it's just a tiny bit... thank you for your time btw..!

Have you tried testing the waters at all? Like asking what he thinks about people being bi 'because someone in you class is bi and you're just a little confused about how you should feel about that'? Or watching a show with him that features a bi character as a main character? Sometimes it helps to do something like that to find out whether or not you feel comfortable. 

It sounds like you're pretty open with your dad? Do you really think that he'd get mad at you over this? There's a chance he won't know a lot about being bi, but I'm pretty sure it'll go over fine :) If your dad was really so put off by it that he'd get mad at you over it, you'd probably already know his opinions on it.

Hope this helps

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Heyy @Saori23,  I am Luie, one of the support mentors with Ditch the Label. I see that you're new to our platform and I wanted to say a massive welcome! Super awesome having you join our community. You can start conversations like this or even join other topics on the forums option. We also offer one to one support if you'd prefer that, if you click on 'Confidential Support' in the top bar next to blogs, you can send a request and one of the support mentors will get back to you. 

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17 hours ago, Saori23 said:

Hi I need help coming out as you saw in the title (tbh I dont why I'm including that here ig I just don't know how else to start this, im sorry). Anyways I've been so frustrated lately because well last year I for the first time realized that I was bisexual mostly because I didn't know that that was a thing I thought that you either loved guys or girls no matter what your gender is, period. But then I started hearing about the owl house from someone at my school and well yeah... and then little by little I came out to my friends and even some family members who I really trust. Here's the thing though I dont hide stuff from my dad... except for this... and at first it didn't really bother me like at all it wasn't on my mind... but lately it's just been eating me alive every second I'm awake, I mean all I need is to have dreams/nightmares about it for it to be an all consuming thought.... like yesterday I was really bored and decided to watch Wonder Woman and he joined me and in the scene where Steve is talking about not sleeping with Diana on the boat he was jokingly raising his hand and saying that he volunteered and I just had the strongest urge to just tag along and say "same" and there's been so many interactions like that that I could present but I wont bother you with it.The point is that I am not even sure if he'd be ok with it and/or wouldn't care or if he would because by now it just seems so obvious with every hint i've been leaving  so maybe hes suspicious but then again he can be really oblivious so I don't even know what to do... so I would appreciate it if you guys could help even if it's just a tiny bit... thank you for your time btw..!

 

Thank you for reaching out and sharing your thoughts and feelings with us on the DTL community @Saori23. It sounds like you've been going through a lot lately, and I want you to know that it's completely okay to feel frustrated and uncertain about coming out to your dad. It's a big step, and it's normal to feel anxious about how he might react, especially when you have a close relationship with him. Our platform here is inclusive of everybody so feel free to ask other members for their thoughts as well (Shout out to @Emberfrost12 for already responding here too).

Realizing and accepting your bisexuality is a journey, and it's great that you've found support from your friends and trusted family members along the way. It's also understandable that keeping this part of yourself hidden from your dad has been weighing heavily on your mind, especially when certain situations trigger those thoughts and feelings. Many people go through similar experiences when coming out to their loved ones, trust me you are NOT alone. It's okay to take your time figuring out the best way to approach this with your dad.

I am wondering have you thought about what you would like the outcome to be when you come out to him? Understanding your own expectations and desires can help guide your decision-making process. Additionally, is there someone you trust, like a friend or another family member, who could offer support or help facilitate the conversation with your dad?

Your safety and well-being are the most important so please remember to prioritize yourself throughout this journey.

You're incredibly brave for opening up about this, and I admire your courage. Take things one step at a time, and remember that you deserve love and acceptance for who you are. WE (The DTL community and the mentors) are here for you. 

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