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Nala    

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This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Self-Harm

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Why can’t I just love myself for the way I am?

Everyday I wake up exhausted. I look in the mirror and think to myself, how can I be this ugly? Is this actually me?I look n that mirror and see myself as really fat. I disgust myself so much. Truly nobody and I mean nobody, Is as ugly as I am. I hate the way my face looks. I just hate everything about me. I try so hard to like what I see, but I physically can’t. No matter how hard I try to. I just want to feel ok with my appearance for once.

And then, that’s when self harm appears. I get so grossed out with myself that I get a massive unbearable urge to hurt myself. Let me tell you, once I start harming myself, I feel out of control and like I cannot stop. I don’t think I deserve anything. I don’t understand why I can’t just stop harming myself? Just wanna bang my head on the wall until I’m unconscious man. 

Edited by Aurora
Added trigger warning
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  • Digital Mentor
11 hours ago, Nala said:

Why can’t I just love myself for the way I am?

Everyday I wake up exhausted. I look in the mirror and think to myself, how can I be this ugly? Is this actually me?I look n that mirror and see myself as really fat. I disgust myself so much. Truly nobody and I mean nobody, Is as ugly as I am. I hate the way my face looks. I just hate everything about me. I try so hard to like what I see, but I physically can’t. No matter how hard I try to. I just want to feel ok with my appearance for once.

And then, that’s when self harm appears. I get so grossed out with myself that I get a massive unbearable urge to hurt myself. Let me tell you, once I start harming myself, I feel out of control and like I cannot stop. I don’t think I deserve anything. I don’t understand why I can’t just stop harming myself? Just wanna bang my head on the wall until I’m unconscious man. 

Hi Nala, I'm sorry to hear you are having such a tough time at the moment. I have replied to your message on confidential support. Maybe we can talk about it some more there? We're here for you 🫂

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