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(Posting to a different section because I got no responses) So I am AFAB, trans and non-binary, and I have decided that in the future I will get top surgery and start dressing more androgynous/masculine. There’s just a few obstacles. First of all, my parents are transphobic, and I live in the same house as them, and probably will for a couple more years. I’m kinda scared of medically transitioning while living in the same house with them. Even when I do leave the house, I have this constant fear that one day, while I’m busy living my life, my parents will ask to see me again and I’ll have no response. I don’t hate my parents to the point where I’d disown them (even if they’re LGBTQ-phobic). Secondly, because of my gender, being genderfluid, my chest dysphoria fluctuates, making me question whether I should really get top surgery or not. I have considered other surgeries like vocal coaching and non-surgical options and I am undecided on them. Even figuring out what my new full name should be is hard. Does anyone have any advice for me?
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This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Hate
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Hey, i've been really wanted to cut my hair for the longest time to a sort of "boyish" haircut and my mom won't allow me. I've cut my hair to a sort of similar length before and my mom hated it. She would look at me with disgust and when we were walking home from the salon she started saying stuff like "you look like a boy, your a girl not a boy" and other stuff like that but i cant remember all that well because it's been a while. But that experience made me cry a lot, and of course my mom said she was sorry and started saying how beautiful i am to make me feel better. Which is so annoying because i know she doesn't think that way. A little while after i got that haircut she didn't care about it, but made the occasional negative comment on it. So maybe if i get this haircut she'll hate it at first, and then get used to it?? i hope so at least . But yeah she wants me to grow out my hair and whenever i bring it up to her or argue about it to her she settles on letting my cut it after my graduation from school. It's a step towards the right direction but now i talk about cutting my hair sometimes and she just flat out says no. Maybe she said she would let me cut my hair later to shut me up... can someone help me figure out how to get my hair cut with my moms permission? i honestly don't care if my mom hates it i just want to cut it so bad because it would give me so much gender euphoria and it would make me love myself a lot more. btw my mom is homophobic and transphobic (obviously) This is the haircut i want, i made sure to have a picture of a fem person so my mom could recognize that girls can still look girlish with this haircut. I didnt send this picture to my mom yet so maybe i should?
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For as long as I can remember I've felt like I don't fit in with the other guys. As I was growing up I had thought countless times that maybe I was meant to be a girl but until sometime last year, I hadn't thought into it much. I think I'm trans but a friend of mine, who hasn't really known me that long, doesn't think that I am and thinks I might just be a femboy. I've been having doubts about whether I am trans or not and her comment hasn't helped. I can't come out as trans irl currently but I've been living as a girl online in a game called imvu and I feel happy when people use she/her pronouns when referring to me and when people call me the name I picked. I don't know what to think, I feel I'd be happier as a girl but I'm scared I'll regret it if I do.
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My name is Jason. I'm a 17yo trans man, still in school. I present male online and around my friends (who I am out to), obviously dressing like a typical guy on a daily basis. I'd say I probably pass for the most part as long as you don't look at my face, but that's kind of besides the point. I'm neither out to my school nor to my parents, and I wanted to fix that. The thing with my parents is that they're kind of transphobic. I can't really say how transphobic, but they've definitely made comments like "This person is a man—but that's what they want you to think" or "These boys' parents force them to be women" etc. Not to mention they're extremely enbyphobic (though that doesn't exactly concern me personally as I am a binary man—it's still wrong, obviously). Despite all this, I really really want to come out to them and I know how I want to do it (giving them a gender reveal card that says "It's a boy!" before I leave on a school trip, though I'd have to make sure they realize I'm referring to myself so they don't think I'm pregnant or something???), I'm just extremely nervous and I'm not quite sure what exactly I'd want to tell them. I don't even know if it's a good idea, but I'm willing to try. The worst they could do is simply disregard it and reprimand me about it, but I know I probably wouldn't get grounded or anything like that. I really want to start medically transitioning—at the very least get more masculine clothing than the extremely limited amount I have at the moment. For school, I just genuinely have no clue how I'd do that. My entire class isn't exactly garbage, but I wouldn't say they're all that supportive of the LGBT community. They're the "I don't really care if you're straight or gay" kind, I feel. I don't really know how the teachers would be with this cause the vast majority of them don't show their own opinions or beliefs (as that isn't allowed for teachers to do where I live). My friend suggested I e-mail our class's main teacher, but I really don't know what I'd write and what I'd want to do after coming out to literally just one teacher. I don't think she really realizes how mortifying the idea of coming out is to me though (she's ace and her own coming out went really smoothly). I'm looking for advice, maybe tips and experiences from people who have already come out as non-cis to their parents/school, and just ideas of what to say to either when I do actually come out.
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