TinyDinos Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 I swear if I have to mediate ONE MORE FIGHT between my preteen sisters, I am going to explode. They fight over E V E R Y T H I N G. And I am so fed up with dealing with their bad attitudes and nastiness while my mom’s working. I didn’t volunteer to be the unpaid babysitter! I didn’t volunteer to be the second mom! I shouldn’t have to deal with anyones behavior other than my own. I literally want to scream and throw something really really REALLY heavy at these kids. They fr wait until she’s working and give me all of their drama. Then when I intervene bc they’re going too far, or because they literally ASK ME to get involved, 13 lashes out when she doesn’t get her way and rolls her eyes, and gives her snarky little nasty attitude, saying “You’re not my mom so stop butting in and acting like it.” Like, who else is raising you?? Who cooks you dinner? Who listened to you cry and yell and did so without judgement so you had a safe space even when I disagreed with what you thought?? Like nobody cares about how much time and energy I spend on them and that’s why I wish I were an only child, why I don’t have many friends, and why I don’t have many good relationships. Thanks for listening to my TED Talk. 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted January 27, 2023 Author Share Posted January 27, 2023 Tell Me Why This girl fr thinks she can lecture me about feeding HER dog as if she’s my boss. 13 just came all the way downstairs to my room, just to tell me that there wasn’t dog food upstairs for her dog (we take turns feeding the dogs and it was my turn and I told her there was already food upstairs, which there was) and that she “Had to come all the way downstairs instead of me feeding the dog like I’m supposed to. So just for next time, don’t assume there’s food upstairs and just feed her when I tell you too.” I tell her that there was food upstairs, and wth does she mean “just for next time”. Even if she saw the food up there, I wouldn’t just assume and dodge responsibility. Like, why would I do that? If she gave the dog the food from upstairs it would’ve been eaten and there wouldn’t be anymore. It’s literally common sense. But this girl fr wants to be like “for next time. Because I don’t want to have to come downstairs again bc you just assumed and now you’re not doing your job.” gtfo. Who do you think you’re talking to? Then she has the AUDACITY to be like “I don’t see the point in sitting here and arguing with you. I didn’t come down here to argue. Just do your job next time.” ¿Por qué diablos crees que tienes derecho a mandarme y decirme que haga mi trabajo? ¡Ni siquiera sabes cómo doblar tu propia ropa porque eres tan perezoso que no haces nada por ti mismo! Juro por Dios que nunca voy a tener hijos. No vale la pena. No me estoy haciendo esto a mí mismo voluntariamente. Buenas noches y lo siento. Yo necesito a dormir. I can’t wait to move out. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 I’m sorry this happened, how are you now? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted January 28, 2023 Author Share Posted January 28, 2023 18 hours ago, _Leila_ said: I’m sorry this happened, how are you now? I’m okay. My sisters and I started covering some Beach Bunny songs and we really bonded today so I’m in a better mood.. just tired now haha MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Leila- Posted January 28, 2023 Share Posted January 28, 2023 2 hours ago, TinyDinos said: I’m okay. My sisters and I started covering some Beach Bunny songs and we really bonded today so I’m in a better mood.. just tired now haha That’s good! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamoroll_iwritebooks Posted January 30, 2023 Share Posted January 30, 2023 On 1/28/2023 at 3:07 AM, _Leila_ said: That’s good! It is. I have a little brother whose little friends think they cantell me what to do. Hell, NO. I completely understand. It's good your feeling better MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted January 31, 2023 Author Share Posted January 31, 2023 On 1/30/2023 at 6:37 AM, LEOQUEENUNITED said: It is. I have a little brother whose little friends think they cantell me what to do. Hell, NO. I completely understand. It's good your feeling better Thank you MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madeleine_357 Posted January 31, 2023 Share Posted January 31, 2023 On 1/26/2023 at 7:43 PM, TinyDinos said: I swear if I have to mediate ONE MORE FIGHT between my preteen sisters, I am going to explode. They fight over E V E R Y T H I N G. And I am so fed up with dealing with their bad attitudes and nastiness while my mom’s working. I didn’t volunteer to be the unpaid babysitter! I didn’t volunteer to be the second mom! I shouldn’t have to deal with anyones behavior other than my own. I literally want to scream and throw something really really REALLY heavy at these kids. They fr wait until she’s working and give me all of their drama. Then when I intervene bc they’re going too far, or because they literally ASK ME to get involved, 13 lashes out when she doesn’t get her way and rolls her eyes, and gives her snarky little nasty attitude, saying “You’re not my mom so stop butting in and acting like it.” Like, who else is raising you?? Who cooks you dinner? Who listened to you cry and yell and did so without judgement so you had a safe space even when I disagreed with what you thought?? Like nobody cares about how much time and energy I spend on them and that’s why I wish I were an only child, why I don’t have many friends, and why I don’t have many good relationships. Thanks for listening to my TED Talk. Wow. That seems..... very stressful. And I bet you would want so smash something. My younger brother and sister fight all the time too. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted January 31, 2023 Author Share Posted January 31, 2023 22 minutes ago, Madeleine_357 said: Wow. That seems..... very stressful. And I bet you would want so smash something. My younger brother and sister fight all the time too. Yeah it is but there’s nothing I can do about it unfortunately :/ At the end of the day I can’t help but love them even if they treat me like shit MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madeleine_357 Posted January 31, 2023 Share Posted January 31, 2023 26 minutes ago, TinyDinos said: Yeah it is but there’s nothing I can do about it unfortunately :/ At the end of the day I can’t help but love them even if they treat me like shit Yeah ik the feeling lol 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted January 31, 2023 Author Share Posted January 31, 2023 I know they hate me and treat me like garbage, but I love my sisters no matter what. My mom just got into a nasty shouting match with 13, and 13 was kinda pushing it and being snippy and defiant. My mom wound up yelling at her and sent her up to her room. I went to my room halfway through the shouting match because I was feeling really anxious but I could still hear them through the wall since the living room is on the other side of the wall in my bedroom but it helped a little. 13 went up to her room, but it’s right above mine and she’s crying so aggressively and screaming into her pillows, and I can hear it all from my room. I’m so anxious, but I’m not worried for our safety or anything. I just feel really bad about the situation in general. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madeleine_357 Posted January 31, 2023 Share Posted January 31, 2023 1 hour ago, TinyDinos said: I know they hate me and treat me like garbage, but I love my sisters no matter what. My mom just got into a nasty shouting match with 13, and 13 was kinda pushing it and being snippy and defiant. My mom wound up yelling at her and sent her up to her room. I went to my room halfway through the shouting match because I was feeling really anxious but I could still hear them through the wall since the living room is on the other side of the wall in my bedroom but it helped a little. 13 went up to her room, but it’s right above mine and she’s crying so aggressively and screaming into her pillows, and I can hear it all from my room. I’m so anxious, but I’m not worried for our safety or anything. I just feel really bad about the situation in general. Yeah that cannot be fun to deal with. And I mean, it's family so you're really going to love them no matter what, and I'm sure your sisters love you, even if they don't show it. Treating you like garbage may be their outlet for their bottled up emotions. Whether they struggle with problems at school, or it's something else, there's usually a reason that most likely won't have anything to do with you personally as to why they treat you like this. I would just try and maintain some self-control and try your hardest to be nice, even when they're not nice to you. That may help lighten everything. Ik you didn't ask me for advice... you don't have to follow it. keep ranting if you want I have lot's of time to read it. :) MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted March 11, 2023 Author Share Posted March 11, 2023 I literally want to put my head thru a wall. It’s 2 30 in the morning where I live rn, and I have to be awake at 8 am. I agreed to stay up late w 13 bc she wanted to straighten my hair (I have type 3b curly hair and she likes to mess around w it) I let her do her thing and braid it and stuff. I’m exhausted and want to go to sleep, and she’s obviously tired too. For some reason she always escorts me downstairs and follows me into my room, so assuming she was going to do the same thing tonight and not having the energy to argue, I TELL HER “hey I’m leaving your door open for you, let’s go, I’m tired, “ she looks me IN THE EYE, and says “oh okay.” And I walk downstairs to go to my room. This little brat fr leaves me alone for 5 minutes and then storms downstairs, opens my door without knocking, and scolds me about how “not cool that was to just leave her door open “ I tell her that first of all, she literally does it to me all of the time, and secondly I TOOD HER that I was doing it bc she always follows me and she literally said okay. She goes back and forth w me for a bit before I give up and tell her if it really means that much to her, I’ll just suck it up and go upstairs and close the stupid door, she says not to and just STANDS IN MY DOORWAY, literally just stands there to annoy me. I ask her what she wants and she ignores me and I repeat my offer to close the door and just to let me go to sleep, and then she calls me a jerk before leaving my room door open and seemingly walking away. I ignore her being petty and I get up and close the door. She tells me not to slam my door even though I didn’t, and then walks away. I clone my door AGAIN, SHE WAS WAITING IN THE HALLWAY TO REPEATEDLY OPEN THE DOOR THE NEXT 5 TIMES I CLOSE IT. I snap at her and tell her to knock it off and she tells me not to tell her what to do before FINALLY walking away, but not before opening my door A G A I N, but ALSO leaving the door that separates the rest of the house from the hallway leading to my bedroom and my moms office open AS WELL. Then she proceeded to go upstairs to her room (directly above mine) and play her music RIDICULOUSLY loudly, knowing that I’m trying to go to sleep. if I thought I could get away with hitting her I would she’s literally the most self absorbed bully I’ve ever met and I seriously wonder why I keep bending over backwards to keep her happy and give her what she wants. Nobody ever does that for me, and when I do it for other people I only get taken advantage of and I’m sick of being used and taken for granted. And it’s not just her either, my other sister does it too, all of my friends have done it, even my own PARENTS do it. The only thing I seem good for is being taken advantage of. I really wish someone would actually prioritize my wants and needs above their own for once, but at the same time I wouldn’t be able to accept it bc I’m only used to doing everything for myself and constantly giving myself away to everybody I meet. I need to stop being a doormat MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catsup Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 On 3/11/2023 at 4:50 AM, TinyTurtles said: I literally want to put my head thru a wall. It’s 2 30 in the morning where I live rn, and I have to be awake at 8 am. I agreed to stay up late w 13 bc she wanted to straighten my hair (I have type 3b curly hair and she likes to mess around w it) I let her do her thing and braid it and stuff. I’m exhausted and want to go to sleep, and she’s obviously tired too. For some reason she always escorts me downstairs and follows me into my room, so assuming she was going to do the same thing tonight and not having the energy to argue, I TELL HER “hey I’m leaving your door open for you, let’s go, I’m tired, “ she looks me IN THE EYE, and says “oh okay.” And I walk downstairs to go to my room. This little brat fr leaves me alone for 5 minutes and then storms downstairs, opens my door without knocking, and scolds me about how “not cool that was to just leave her door open “ I tell her that first of all, she literally does it to me all of the time, and secondly I TOOD HER that I was doing it bc she always follows me and she literally said okay. She goes back and forth w me for a bit before I give up and tell her if it really means that much to her, I’ll just suck it up and go upstairs and close the stupid door, she says not to and just STANDS IN MY DOORWAY, literally just stands there to annoy me. I ask her what she wants and she ignores me and I repeat my offer to close the door and just to let me go to sleep, and then she calls me a jerk before leaving my room door open and seemingly walking away. I ignore her being petty and I get up and close the door. She tells me not to slam my door even though I didn’t, and then walks away. I clone my door AGAIN, SHE WAS WAITING IN THE HALLWAY TO REPEATEDLY OPEN THE DOOR THE NEXT 5 TIMES I CLOSE IT. I snap at her and tell her to knock it off and she tells me not to tell her what to do before FINALLY walking away, but not before opening my door A G A I N, but ALSO leaving the door that separates the rest of the house from the hallway leading to my bedroom and my moms office open AS WELL. Then she proceeded to go upstairs to her room (directly above mine) and play her music RIDICULOUSLY loudly, knowing that I’m trying to go to sleep. if I thought I could get away with hitting her I would she’s literally the most self absorbed bully I’ve ever met and I seriously wonder why I keep bending over backwards to keep her happy and give her what she wants. Nobody ever does that for me, and when I do it for other people I only get taken advantage of and I’m sick of being used and taken for granted. And it’s not just her either, my other sister does it too, all of my friends have done it, even my own PARENTS do it. The only thing I seem good for is being taken advantage of. I really wish someone would actually prioritize my wants and needs above their own for once, but at the same time I wouldn’t be able to accept it bc I’m only used to doing everything for myself and constantly giving myself away to everybody I meet. I need to stop being a doormat Hi @TinyTurtles, That sounds extremely frustrating and definitely not okay that your sister kept you up like that. I'm sorry to hear that being taken advantage of sounds like a pattern in your life. It is great though that you're recognizing it and perhaps ready to take steps to asserting yourself more. Some things other people want from you might be reasonable requests you are okay with, but it sounds like your sister went overboard with not letting you sleep. If you don't mind some advice, I'd like to ask: What are the things that are non-negotiable, things that you should not put up with? Knowing your limits could be the first step to asserting yourself. I'm glad you're looking out for yourself by posting here, and I'm sorry again to hear you had such a rough night. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted March 13, 2023 Author Share Posted March 13, 2023 19 hours ago, Catsup said: Hi @TinyTurtles, That sounds extremely frustrating and definitely not okay that your sister kept you up like that. I'm sorry to hear that being taken advantage of sounds like a pattern in your life. It is great though that you're recognizing it and perhaps ready to take steps to asserting yourself more. Some things other people want from you might be reasonable requests you are okay with, but it sounds like your sister went overboard with not letting you sleep. If you don't mind some advice, I'd like to ask: What are the things that are non-negotiable, things that you should not put up with? Knowing your limits could be the first step to asserting yourself. I'm glad you're looking out for yourself by posting here, and I'm sorry again to hear you had such a rough night. Hey @Catsup Thanks for the reply, I really appreciate you and your time. No worries. Like I said, I’m used to it. I just need to vent sometimes bc she knows exactly how to push my buttons, and to add onto it I’m extremely exhausted so I’m more irritable than usual so even if she wasn’t trying to tick me off initially, I know she’s petty and would do it on purpose afterwards. I want to set boundaries but they’re never respected, and under the rare circumstance that they are, it’s always begrudgingly and the other person makes me feel like I’m being unreasonable and insensitive to what they want. Having learned that I’m a people pleaser by nature, I understand a bit better now why it’s so hard for me to stick up for myself, and it’s something even my parents have commented on. I guess to actually answer your question though, something that I’m working on with her is taking time for me, so sometimes when I’m too tired to hang out or my social battery is dead to politely decline her invites to do stuff together bc I just need some rest. Even that though like I said earlier, she makes me feel really guilty about it and feel like I’m neglecting her or my other sister. Something that I already implement though is that school is more important, so if I have work that I haven’t finished or if it’s during school hours my siblings usually won’t give me a hard time, but that’s mostly because my mom is on their backs about their own work Thank you again for your reply and advice, I really appreciate your help and consideration. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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