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People at my college


prolific05    

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Idk why do people want to block me after I met them in my classes at my community college. Ive been nice to them for two semesters. Every time I take a college break, they ignore me and block me every where on Social media. I didnt do anything wrong to them. its so annoying and irritating Why do people do stuff like that?. I don't think I would rather meet any new friends at my community college anymore because I can't deal with these students and I can't stand the way they treat me there. If My dad would've took me to see a Social Counselor, then non of this wouldn't happen. I can't wait to pass my two classes in Summer 2020 and take classes online in FA 2020 and Spring 2021 to get away from them and transfer to NCSU in fall 2021. Do people do that to you when you meet them in college?

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Hello @prolific05

 

Sorry to hear you are having some difficulties making new friends.

 

Maybe a fresh start will be good for you. Try not to think that just because you haven't had the most positive experience here that you will be unable to build strong relationships in the future. Take this as a learning curve and look at what went wrong and what could work better next time. Make sure you are respecting other people's boundaries and that they respect yours. Could you contact student services where you are now and ask to speak to someone?

 

Remi

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Have you made an appointment to speak to your counsellor? Let us know how iti goes.

 

We can't control other people, the only thing we are able to control is ourselves.

 

Remi

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I haven't done it yet. Idk why ppl do that. They should responding to my messages when I'm on college break, not just sit there and just read my message and not reply. It's so annoying. If I see Ashley and Kirsten at the Animezement next year, they better be nice to me when they see me. Because I didn't do nothing wrong to them

Edited by prolific05
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Okay, well maybe they don't know you well enough yet to reply on social media. You could try and focus on the frienships you already have with people at your college. What about people on your course?

 

Remi

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I met Paige in math class in Spring 2019 and she ignored me and blocked me last Month

We talked in Math class and she never replied on Facebook. I tried to be nice to her to get to respond so I tried calling through messenger and then she blocked me last Month

Edited by prolific05
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Hello @prolific05

 

I know this is hard to hear, but they probably feel a bit overwhelmed by you contacting them on social media if you don't know them very well. If they have blocked you that is a sign that they don't want any more communication at this time and we have to respect their boundaries and not contact them until they reach out to you. I understand this can be difficult but it is the best thing for all of you.

 

Remi

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I got a rude message from B on kakaotalk I met at church and she told me not to contact her, her family and friends ever again, the next time I see her, I'm gonna knock her out. She better talking to me when she sees me. I don't care if she's mad. That's why I her friends at uncsa on instagram to see how's she doing. D***! She never answered my calls and never responded to my messages since 2015. I can do what ever I want. I don't care if it makes people uncomfortable or makes them mad. It has nothing to do with us talking to each other

Edited by prolific05
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Hello @prolific05

 

I'm okay today thanks, how are you? I can hear that you are a bit annoyed right now? We both know that physical violence is never the answer.

 

What is it that you want to say to her? If you haven't spoken for quite a few years then what do you want to say? If talking to other people makes them feel uncomfortable is it worth taking a step back and asking why it is making them feel like this and how we could approach things better in the future so we don't make them feel this way.

 

What kind of messages are you sending? Maybe we could look at them togehter and then we could see where the communication is breaking down and try and tweak your sentences to make people feel more comfortable?

 

How do you feel about that?

 

Remi

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Hello @prolific05

 

I'm okay today thanks, how are you? I can hear that you are a bit annoyed right now? We both know that physical violence is never the answer.

 

What is it that you want to say to her? If you haven't spoken for quite a few years then what do you want to say? If talking to other people makes them feel uncomfortable is it worth taking a step back and asking why it is making them feel like this and how we could approach things better in the future so we don't make them feel this way.

 

What kind of messages are you sending? Maybe we could look at them togehter and then we could see where the communication is breaking down and try and tweak your sentences to make people feel more comfortable?

 

How do you feel about that?

 

Remi

Yeah that would be Kool I'll get it the messages

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i can't do it through a computer either. I just asked her when is her and siblings bdays, asked her about her cousins that live in South Korea. Asked her if her parents able to pick me up She didn't like talking on fb messenger and onliy prefer talking on the phone. She hasn't responded to me since May 2017. I tried calling her and texting her and she never replied. i sent her a text and said "I feel like I'm ignored. I noticed that we haven't talked in a while. I was hoping we could catch up because I've missed talking with you. Are you free anytime soon?" and she still didnt respond. I didnt cuss at her, or called her names or didnt say anything to offend her. one of her friends told me that she has a history of mentally ill. every time she gets repulsive, she gets sick easily. She hasn't updated her social media since June 2019 and now shes taking a break from college this semester. She can't just ditch social media and not say anything. Thats why I was worried about her and she didnt have to get all mad over it. I didn't want to blow up on her, and fuss her out because i know she wouldn't talk to me so I still say nice things to her. I deleted that rude message from her and sent her a kind and wrote " Hi, B, :) how are you doing today? This is the first time you texted after a long time. that's very nice of you"

Edited by prolific05
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Hello @prolific05

 

Okay so, if you haven't spoken since 2017, I think this means she doesn't want to comminicate with you, and that is totally okay. She is allowed to come off social media for her own mental health and she is allowed to not reply.

 

We have to be sensitive when trying to make new friends - some people feel overwhelmed by too much stimulation. So what we could do better in future is. Send one message - and then wait for a reply, if we don't get that reply, then we have to assume that that person isn't ready for a friendship with us and we must respect that and not send them lots of messages.

 

Does this make sense??

 

Remi

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