TinyDinos Posted August 10, 2023 Author Share Posted August 10, 2023 22 minutes ago, Catsup said: Oh that sounds so cool! How was the lesson? :D It was AWESOME! I learned so much and had a great time :) plus my teacher said I’m a super fast learner so I’m so happy MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84773 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 12, 2023 Author Share Posted August 12, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. I’m feeling really low right now. Long story short, I have been arguing with my mom for the past month about doing a college math class that I do not want to do. Yesterday I finally come clean to her about how all of this is honestly making me feel, and she made me feel guilty, accusing me of complaining and said “you sound like a ‘woe is me’ you’re literally crying over nonsense, how dare you have parents who are actually invested in your educational career and push you to achieve new things”. I told her I felt like she was forcing ke into something I didn’t want to do, and she said that she pushed me to do all of the other things I did and how proud I am of it now and how I should be grateful and made me feel overall shitty. Then she wonders why I get so defensive while talking with her and why I don’t feel comfortable confiding in her. I told her how I feel pressured to do something I don’t want to do because she wants me too and I’m stupid if I do anything different, and I feel like I don’t have a say or a choice in any of this, even though she told me last school year that I need to be better about saying no to things I don’t want to do as long as it’s reasonable, and that the classes I take in high school is a choice I’m allowed to make, but then she pulls this out of nowhere. worst of all is then she rubbed it in my face, saying that she “won’t force me to do anything other than finish high school because that’s the law. But if I want to make grown up choices without her input, then I better start thinking now because it won’t just be decisions about school.” The rule in my house is that I can live with my parents as long as I’m in school. She’s saying I don’t have to go to college at all, but if I want to make that decision I need to find somewhere else to live. I fucking hate it here. The worst part is I can’t even go to my bio dad because he disowned me. Now here i am. im a fucking nobody who has no father. And now whenever next year rolls around I might have to be apartment hunting. I don’t know what I did wrong, it’s like no matter what I keep getting the short end of the stick. I’m always the one left to drown after helping everyone else. I’m always the one left behind. But everyone can always count on me to listen to their rants, and comfort them after the hard days, and to support them no matter what, and love them unconditionally, and take care of the behind-the-scenes, and handle the hard stuff because I’m older, and to keep my nose in my own business because I don’t know what I’m talking about, and to watch the god damn kids that aren’t mine, and to clean up, and pass all of my classes, and to go to college, and to graduate and to get a job, and to learn to drive and to move out and to grow up so fucking fast that I don’t even know what I want to do yet but god forbid I ask questions because I’m so fucking stupid I haven’t figured it out by myself yet, and if I show any sliver of weakness then I’m an ungrateful brat because everyone else has it so much worse and I don’t have a reason to cry because nothing happened to me. god I hate myself MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84801 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 12, 2023 Author Share Posted August 12, 2023 Honestly just overall feeling lonely. I’m so shit at keeping friends and I don’t see anybody. I just feel sad MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84811 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Megs- Posted August 12, 2023 Share Posted August 12, 2023 10 minutes ago, TinyDinos said: Honestly just overall feeling lonely. I’m so shit at keeping friends and I don’t see anybody. I just feel sad Want to talk to me? You don’t have to, I just don’t want you feeling like you have nobody, hugs! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84817 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 13, 2023 Author Share Posted August 13, 2023 (edited) 6 hours ago, Megs- said: Want to talk to me? You don’t have to, I just don’t want you feeling like you have nobody, hugs! I don’t want to drama dump y’know? I’m okay for now. Went to my baby cousin’s bday party and some of the kids I babysit/used to babysit were there so I was busy. They’re really cute, and showed up at the perfect time. They took my mind off of the anxiety. I’m tired tho. It was a pool party. the baby was ADORABLE however. She loved playing in the water, and she very much enjoyed the popsicle I shared with her Edited August 13, 2023 by TinyDinos MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84860 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 13, 2023 Author Share Posted August 13, 2023 4 minutes ago, TinyDinos said: I don’t want to drama dump y’know? I’m okay for now. Went to my baby cousin’s bday party and some of the kids I babysit/used to babysit were there so I was busy. They’re really cute, and showed up at the perfect time. They took my mind off of the anxiety. I’m tired tho. It was a pool party. I was anxious bc I was super triggered while I was there. My bio dad’s boss was there, and my aunt’s ex-husband was there (his sons were with him and he brought them to the party), and everyone else were people I haven’t seen in years since the divorce happened and half of them defended my bio dad, the other half acted like I didn’t exist since it’d happened. No support from people I grew up with. I’m impatient. I wish I could change my last name right now :( I was talking about it w my cousin and he says if it makes me feel better I should do it. That made me feel better a bit. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84863 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catsup Posted August 13, 2023 Share Posted August 13, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 17 hours ago, TinyDinos said: I’m feeling really low right now. Long story short, I have been arguing with my mom for the past month about doing a college math class that I do not want to do. Yesterday I finally come clean to her about how all of this is honestly making me feel, and she made me feel guilty, accusing me of complaining and said “you sound like a ‘woe is me’ you’re literally crying over nonsense, how dare you have parents who are actually invested in your educational career and push you to achieve new things”. I told her I felt like she was forcing ke into something I didn’t want to do, and she said that she pushed me to do all of the other things I did and how proud I am of it now and how I should be grateful and made me feel overall shitty. Then she wonders why I get so defensive while talking with her and why I don’t feel comfortable confiding in her. I told her how I feel pressured to do something I don’t want to do because she wants me too and I’m stupid if I do anything different, and I feel like I don’t have a say or a choice in any of this, even though she told me last school year that I need to be better about saying no to things I don’t want to do as long as it’s reasonable, and that the classes I take in high school is a choice I’m allowed to make, but then she pulls this out of nowhere. worst of all is then she rubbed it in my face, saying that she “won’t force me to do anything other than finish high school because that’s the law. But if I want to make grown up choices without her input, then I better start thinking now because it won’t just be decisions about school.” The rule in my house is that I can live with my parents as long as I’m in school. She’s saying I don’t have to go to college at all, but if I want to make that decision I need to find somewhere else to live. I fucking hate it here. The worst part is I can’t even go to my bio dad because he disowned me. Now here i am. im a fucking nobody who has no father. And now whenever next year rolls around I might have to be apartment hunting. I don’t know what I did wrong, it’s like no matter what I keep getting the short end of the stick. I’m always the one left to drown after helping everyone else. I’m always the one left behind. But everyone can always count on me to listen to their rants, and comfort them after the hard days, and to support them no matter what, and love them unconditionally, and take care of the behind-the-scenes, and handle the hard stuff because I’m older, and to keep my nose in my own business because I don’t know what I’m talking about, and to watch the god damn kids that aren’t mine, and to clean up, and pass all of my classes, and to go to college, and to graduate and to get a job, and to learn to drive and to move out and to grow up so fucking fast that I don’t even know what I want to do yet but god forbid I ask questions because I’m so fucking stupid I haven’t figured it out by myself yet, and if I show any sliver of weakness then I’m an ungrateful brat because everyone else has it so much worse and I don’t have a reason to cry because nothing happened to me. god I hate myself Hey TinyDinos, it sounds like your mom might not understand depression, is that fair to say? It sounds like there's a lot of pressure that's been put on you, and the expectations aren't matched with the loving support you deserve. Please do not confuse the way people treat you with who you are as a person. You are a wonderful person who cares so much about other people. You perhaps have been getting the short end of the stick looking after your siblings and trying to navigate entering adult life without a lot of help, but know that you deserve much better than that. How much do you think your mom meant having you leave the house if you don't go to college? Is that something you would want to revisit with her when things are cooled down? Sometimes we do need a break when we feel like we've been under pressure for a long time. If it were up to you, where do you want to see yourself after high school? Take care and do try to remember what a good influence you are on other people around you, and how much you have already made a difference to those around you! With time, I think you can be that same person towards yourself too, as you work on your mental health. Are you getting any help right now around your depression? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84868 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 14, 2023 Author Share Posted August 14, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion, Other, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 16 hours ago, Catsup said: Hey TinyDinos, it sounds like your mom might not understand depression, is that fair to say? It sounds like there's a lot of pressure that's been put on you, and the expectations aren't matched with the loving support you deserve. Please do not confuse the way people treat you with who you are as a person. You are a wonderful person who cares so much about other people. You perhaps have been getting the short end of the stick looking after your siblings and trying to navigate entering adult life without a lot of help, but know that you deserve much better than that. How much do you think your mom meant having you leave the house if you don't go to college? Is that something you would want to revisit with her when things are cooled down? Sometimes we do need a break when we feel like we've been under pressure for a long time. If it were up to you, where do you want to see yourself after high school? Take care and do try to remember what a good influence you are on other people around you, and how much you have already made a difference to those around you! With time, I think you can be that same person towards yourself too, as you work on your mental health. Are you getting any help right now around your depression? Yeah that’s very accurate. She told me that if I committed death on myself that I’d go to hell. I also have a very vivid memory about her telling me that Hispanics don’t get depression but I can’t remember what conversation it was, what led up to it, what day it happened on or anything like that so I don’t know if it even actually happened. I’ve expressed feeling pressured and scared of confiding in her before and I was consistently called dramatic for that kind of stuff, and she said I never talk to her not because she isn’t available, but because I don’t want to face consequences for my actions because anytime I’d want to talk to her about something I either “know I’m being over dramatic” or “caused/contributed to the problem in the first place”. I find it really really hard to not see myself as “easy”. I don’t mean it in the usual way. I just mean it in the sense of I feel like I’m a pushover and I do whatever people ask me to. Im just a people pleaser and that’s it. Everyone knows it and everyone exploits it. Unfortunately that’s the reality I have had to come to grips with as much as I wish things were different. The rule is that I don’t have to worry about living expenses including utilities and food as long as I’m in school. My stepdad says as long as I’m working towards a goal pertaining to a career then I’m allowed to live there but my mom disagrees. If I don’t pursue anything (or if I take a gap year) then I have to pay rent and stuff, but I work for my mom so idk what she wants me to do. She just told me I have to figure it out. Legally she really can’t kick me out until I’m 18 but that clock is ticking really fast too. I’ll be 17 in December already. I start my senior year in less than 12 hours. I’m so short on time it’s making me feel short of breath. the conversations have happened while cooled down, we revisited the topic of the class three separate times before this happened. Any time I disagree with her she snaps at me and makes me feel stupid and guilty for saying anything in the first place. This incident in question was the first time I’ve cried during the conversation and she still chose to speak to me the way she did. I’m weak. Being entirely honest if it were up to me I wouldn’t finish high school. I wouldve given up a long time ago. The only reason I’m still here is because I’m a coward and I’m too weak to actually go through with it. My whole life has been working towards this stupid goal of being the first girl on both sides of my family to finish Highschool and the first in my bio dad’s side to go to college. I never had a choice other than college. I just want to make people happy. I don’t want to keep being a disappointment. I don’t want to keep hurting my mom with my stupid behavior. I don’t want ti keep being a failure and an idiot and keep wasting everyone’s time. I hate myself so much for it and she doesn’t even know. She yells at me about how I need to hurry up and make a decision because I keep wasting time and it doesn’t just affect me but I already know that. I already know what a burden I am on everyone, I already know I’m a waste of time and space. I just can’t do the one thing that would make her life easier for good. But I can’t say that. If I do then I’m just being extra and she can’t deal with me and my drama. I wish for once I wouldn’t be such a burden on people. I wish she knew how hard I try ti be a good kid. I wish she knew I was trying ky best and that no matter how hard I try, my best isn’t good enough and how much I wish it was. I wish I could be the perfect daughter. I wish I could make my mom happy and for her to accept my best, I wish I could make my dad want me instead of throwing me away and treating me worse than a stranger. I wish I could be a better step daughter. I wish I wouldn’t have to try so hard to be what people want and ultimately let them down over and over again, I wish I wasn’t alone. I have no help. I’m not even supposed ti be on here. If she knew I was using this site I’d be in ridiculous amounts of trouble and I really don’t want to be in trouble anymore. I swear I’m a good kid, I really am. Or at least I try to be. I’m doing my best. I promise. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84982 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 14, 2023 Author Share Posted August 14, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. My mom yelled at me over not doing dishes that weren’t my responsibility. No congrats on doing my chores without being asked, no recognition for doing it right the first time, so thank you for doing it at all. My sisters failed to do their job and I got yelled at along side them like it was my fault. What’s worse is what she was yelling. Telling us how we have no problem asking her for things but the one things she asked us to do we didn’t do. I wasn’t the one who let the ball drop. I handled my responsibility. She yelled at me on how I had no problem asking her to go halfway on the cost of my driving lessons. I feel so guilty for asking at all. the best part is I’m so scared to drive in the first place. She forced me to sign up for the class. She offered to go half with me. I paid for the larger half with my own money I worked for myself. But she threw it in my face. I’m so greedy. I’m such a selfish brat. I should never have accepted her offer on the thing she forced me to do, I should’ve known better. I should’ve just done my sister’s chores to avoid it. I should’ve been different. im in a really low place right now MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-84983 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted August 14, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted August 14, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 3 hours ago, TinyDinos said: My mom yelled at me over not doing dishes that weren’t my responsibility. No congrats on doing my chores without being asked, no recognition for doing it right the first time, so thank you for doing it at all. My sisters failed to do their job and I got yelled at along side them like it was my fault. What’s worse is what she was yelling. Telling us how we have no problem asking her for things but the one things she asked us to do we didn’t do. I wasn’t the one who let the ball drop. I handled my responsibility. She yelled at me on how I had no problem asking her to go halfway on the cost of my driving lessons. I feel so guilty for asking at all. the best part is I’m so scared to drive in the first place. She forced me to sign up for the class. She offered to go half with me. I paid for the larger half with my own money I worked for myself. But she threw it in my face. I’m so greedy. I’m such a selfish brat. I should never have accepted her offer on the thing she forced me to do, I should’ve known better. I should’ve just done my sister’s chores to avoid it. I should’ve been different. im in a really low place right now Hi there, I know you've been talking to @Catsup but I noticed how you said that you are in a really low place right now so I wanted to jump in. I hope that's OK. I also noticed that you said that your Mom told you that if you committed death on yourself you would go to hell. Do you mind me asking if that's something you have been thinking about and if so, did you talk to your mom about having these thoughts? This might be a bit of a direct question but do you feel safe right now? It's OK to say if you don't. The more we know the better we can support you. Please know that you are not alone and we are here for you. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85014 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 14, 2023 Author Share Posted August 14, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 6 hours ago, Aurora said: Hi there, I know you've been talking to @Catsup but I noticed how you said that you are in a really low place right now so I wanted to jump in. I hope that's OK. I also noticed that you said that your Mom told you that if you committed death on yourself you would go to hell. Do you mind me asking if that's something you have been thinking about and if so, did you talk to your mom about having these thoughts? This might be a bit of a direct question but do you feel safe right now? It's OK to say if you don't. The more we know the better we can support you. Please know that you are not alone and we are here for you. Yes, as much as I love @Catsup it also always a pleasure to speak with you @Aurora :) I have had those.. thoughts… but no I don’t tell my mom. I am okay right now, I slept off the thoughts yesterday and @Coyotea was talking with me last night which really helped too <3 (thank you so much man it really meant a lot) MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85043 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted August 14, 2023 Share Posted August 14, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 1 minute ago, TinyDinos said: Yes, as much as I love @Catsup it also always a pleasure to speak with you @Aurora :) I have had those.. thoughts… but no I don’t tell my mom. I am okay right now, I slept off the thoughts yesterday and @Coyotea was talking with me last night which really helped too <3 (thank you so much man it really meant a lot) Awww I’m glad I could help! I’m here for you anytime <3 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85045 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted August 15, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted August 15, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 18 hours ago, TinyDinos said: Yes, as much as I love @Catsup it also always a pleasure to speak with you @Aurora :) I have had those.. thoughts… but no I don’t tell my mom. I am okay right now, I slept off the thoughts yesterday and @Coyotea was talking with me last night which really helped too <3 (thank you so much man it really meant a lot) Aww, thank you It's always a pleasure to speak with you, too @TinyDinos I'm really glad to hear that some sleep and talking to @Coyotea helped you. I have sent you a message via confidential support so we can talk about the thoughts you've been having a bit more. I hope that's OK. Take care MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85103 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 15, 2023 Author Share Posted August 15, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 10 hours ago, Aurora said: Aww, thank you It's always a pleasure to speak with you, too @TinyDinos I'm really glad to hear that some sleep and talking to @Coyotea helped you. I have sent you a message via confidential support so we can talk about the thoughts you've been having a bit more. I hope that's OK. Take care Thank you MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85150 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 19, 2023 Author Share Posted August 19, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Abuse, Heavy emotion, Other Click this notice to reveal the content. Bahahahaha my bio dad SUCKS! so for those who don’t know, my bio dad disowned me in late April this year, and hasnt spoken to me since. Both of my sisters cut contact with him about two months ago bc of a really bad incident between him and sister 1. he’s been throwing a temper tantrum over my younger siblings choosing not to speak with him, but hasn’t tried to reach out to me once, last time we spoke saying I was to him and how I’m not his daughter anymore, never to contact him again, and wrapped it all up by telling me how he wouldn’t care to never see me again and how he sleeps just fine knowing what he’s done to my sisters and I, and the decision he’s making to disown me. he called sister 1 earlier this week during school hours (he already knows he’s not allowed to but he does it anyways to piss my mom off). He texts my sister that he has “big news” to tell her. She calls him back later, and he reveals that his mom (our grandma) is coming down to visit and how he wants to see us so we can see her. (A.k.a. He doesn’t want his mom to see he has been lying to her about the way he’s been treating us amongst other things.) Sister says it’s okay and that she’ll talk with our mother about seeing our grandmother, and he hasn’t spoken to her again about it. why do I look at my phone yesterday and see I have a missed call from this man? Why the f*** does he want me to be his daughter now? Because his mom is coming to visit?? No f***ing way. (For the record, I don’t like my grandmother either because she eats his lies UP. She blames my mom for everything and always defends him bc he’s “her favorite”, and she’s always on my back about having a job, and college and moving out and getting married n even though I told her to stop bc it makes me uncomfortable. On top of that she likes to compare me to my aunt because she’s only like two months older than me. So TL;DR I don’t like my grandma or aunt either.) What makes all of this worse is that he purposefully tried to get into contact w me for this. I have his number blocked so he tried to ft me through another platform. He knows I don’t want anything to do with him. Where the f*** was that effort to see me and talk to me when I ACTUALLY needed him?? When I asked him for help paying for my prom night??? When I needed help applying for colleges?? For the driving course I begged him for help with and he said he’d cover but he left me to do it by myself and I payed for it even though he said he would???? When my classes were hard in school??? When his stupid druggie friends cussed me out and smoked and called their kids horrible things and I told him I don’t feel comfortable here and he signed me up, without talking to me first, to work for them for free?!?! Where the f*** was he then??? Where the f*** was he when his brother told me I deserved everything my father did to me and worse because I’m nothing more than a worthless disrespectful little girl???? He f***ing sat there and laughed. He f***ing left me by myself. He f***ing ruined EVERYTHING. but NOW he wants me. NOW he wants a relationship. Not when I was begging him to get clean. Not when I forgave him over and over and over and over and over and over again until it drove me insane. Not when I trusted him. Not when I started unsupervised visitation. Not when I shared my biggest secret with him. Not when I tried to like his girlfriend and trusted her too. Not when I took care of his new daughter, his step kid who he insisted wasn’t actually his. Not when I sat there and played f***ing therapist throughout and after the divorce. Not when I caught him cheating SEVERAL times and minded my own business. Not even when he would pick other people’s kids up from school but couldn’t even be bothered to show up on time for my awards ceremonies and performances. Not after I gave up EVERYTHING FOR HIM. he only wants me when he needs something from me. And right now, he needs to keep up appearances for mommy dearest. F*** that. He ain’t my father. He ain’t family. He treated me worse than a stranger and now thats all he is to me, a stranger. and my momma taught me not to talk to strangers so I don’t get hurt. I think she was onto something there. I want to change my last name so badly I need it to happen soon. It’s so triggering especially not that school is back. Writing my name, introducing myself, applying for colleges, all of it is so triggering. I hate it. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85320 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 19, 2023 Author Share Posted August 19, 2023 At the very least we have rain coming and rainy weather is the best. still send prayers or something because there’s a tropical storm/hurricane warning for my area this whole next week and we’re hoping the power doesn’t go out and the flooding isn’t too bad. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85321 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted August 19, 2023 Share Posted August 19, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Abuse, Heavy emotion, Other Click this notice to reveal the content. 5 hours ago, TinyDinos said: Bahahahaha my bio dad SUCKS! so for those who don’t know, my bio dad disowned me in late April this year, and hasnt spoken to me since. Both of my sisters cut contact with him about two months ago bc of a really bad incident between him and sister 1. he’s been throwing a temper tantrum over my younger siblings choosing not to speak with him, but hasn’t tried to reach out to me once, last time we spoke saying I was to him and how I’m not his daughter anymore, never to contact him again, and wrapped it all up by telling me how he wouldn’t care to never see me again and how he sleeps just fine knowing what he’s done to my sisters and I, and the decision he’s making to disown me. he called sister 1 earlier this week during school hours (he already knows he’s not allowed to but he does it anyways to piss my mom off). He texts my sister that he has “big news” to tell her. She calls him back later, and he reveals that his mom (our grandma) is coming down to visit and how he wants to see us so we can see her. (A.k.a. He doesn’t want his mom to see he has been lying to her about the way he’s been treating us amongst other things.) Sister says it’s okay and that she’ll talk with our mother about seeing our grandmother, and he hasn’t spoken to her again about it. why do I look at my phone yesterday and see I have a missed call from this man? Why the f*** does he want me to be his daughter now? Because his mom is coming to visit?? No f***ing way. (For the record, I don’t like my grandmother either because she eats his lies UP. She blames my mom for everything and always defends him bc he’s “her favorite”, and she’s always on my back about having a job, and college and moving out and getting married n even though I told her to stop bc it makes me uncomfortable. On top of that she likes to compare me to my aunt because she’s only like two months older than me. So TL;DR I don’t like my grandma or aunt either.) What makes all of this worse is that he purposefully tried to get into contact w me for this. I have his number blocked so he tried to ft me through another platform. He knows I don’t want anything to do with him. Where the f*** was that effort to see me and talk to me when I ACTUALLY needed him?? When I asked him for help paying for my prom night??? When I needed help applying for colleges?? For the driving course I begged him for help with and he said he’d cover but he left me to do it by myself and I payed for it even though he said he would???? When my classes were hard in school??? When his stupid druggie friends cussed me out and smoked and called their kids horrible things and I told him I don’t feel comfortable here and he signed me up, without talking to me first, to work for them for free?!?! Where the f*** was he then??? Where the f*** was he when his brother told me I deserved everything my father did to me and worse because I’m nothing more than a worthless disrespectful little girl???? He f***ing sat there and laughed. He f***ing left me by myself. He f***ing ruined EVERYTHING. but NOW he wants me. NOW he wants a relationship. Not when I was begging him to get clean. Not when I forgave him over and over and over and over and over and over again until it drove me insane. Not when I trusted him. Not when I started unsupervised visitation. Not when I shared my biggest secret with him. Not when I tried to like his girlfriend and trusted her too. Not when I took care of his new daughter, his step kid who he insisted wasn’t actually his. Not when I sat there and played f***ing therapist throughout and after the divorce. Not when I caught him cheating SEVERAL times and minded my own business. Not even when he would pick other people’s kids up from school but couldn’t even be bothered to show up on time for my awards ceremonies and performances. Not after I gave up EVERYTHING FOR HIM. he only wants me when he needs something from me. And right now, he needs to keep up appearances for mommy dearest. F*** that. He ain’t my father. He ain’t family. He treated me worse than a stranger and now thats all he is to me, a stranger. and my momma taught me not to talk to strangers so I don’t get hurt. I think she was onto something there. I want to change my last name so badly I need it to happen soon. It’s so triggering especially not that school is back. Writing my name, introducing myself, applying for colleges, all of it is so triggering. I hate it. Hey, We have sent a message to check in. Speak soon. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85323 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 19, 2023 Author Share Posted August 19, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Abuse, Heavy emotion, Other Click this notice to reveal the content. 6 hours ago, Monsoon said: Hey, We have sent a message to check in. Speak soon. I can’t see it :( MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85327 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted August 21, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted August 21, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Abuse, Heavy emotion, Other Click this notice to reveal the content. On 8/19/2023 at 6:45 PM, TinyDinos said: I can’t see it :( Hi there, I just wanted to check if you found the message? Have you checked Confidential Support? I also wanted to check in with you and make sure you're OK? I can see that the tropical storm has caused quite a lot of damage and flooding. I hope it's not too bad where you are!! Take care! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85410 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted August 21, 2023 Share Posted August 21, 2023 Hey @TinyDinos Apologies! I did send this in confidential support as a response to one of your other messages. I hope that's okay :) MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85416 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 22, 2023 Author Share Posted August 22, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Abuse, Heavy emotion, Other Click this notice to reveal the content. On 8/21/2023 at 3:38 AM, Aurora said: Hi there, I just wanted to check if you found the message? Have you checked Confidential Support? I also wanted to check in with you and make sure you're OK? I can see that the tropical storm has caused quite a lot of damage and flooding. I hope it's not too bad where you are!! Take care! On 8/21/2023 at 5:20 AM, Monsoon said: Hey @TinyDinos Apologies! I did send this in confidential support as a response to one of your other messages. I hope that's okay :) Yeah I found it I just had to reload the page :) also yes we’re safe from the storm. Our backyard flooded but we were all safe and the power didn’t go out so we’re all good MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85497 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted August 24, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted August 24, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Abuse, Heavy emotion, Other Click this notice to reveal the content. On 8/22/2023 at 8:50 PM, TinyDinos said: Yeah I found it I just had to reload the page :) also yes we’re safe from the storm. Our backyard flooded but we were all safe and the power didn’t go out so we’re all good I'm really glad to hear you're safe from the storm. I hope the backyard flooding wasn't too bad.... MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85756 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 26, 2023 Author Share Posted August 26, 2023 If losing family members was a competition I’d be the winner. Im currently the champion of “Being Disowned by Your Own Biological Family Bingo”! as we stand as of tonight, I have now been disowned by my bio dad, my older uncle (his brother) and his wife, my younger uncle (his youngest brother), my grandmother on his side, my great cousin and his wife on my mom’s side, and my grandmother on my moms side, and aunt on my moms side :D also according to my grandmother, I’m a dictator and I’m corrupting my sisters into hating her. Fml MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85998 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted August 26, 2023 Share Posted August 26, 2023 2 minutes ago, TinyDinos said: If losing family members was a competition I’d be the winner. Im currently the champion of “Being Disowned by Your Own Biological Family Bingo”! as we stand as of tonight, I have now been disowned by my bio dad, my older uncle (his brother) and his wife, my younger uncle (his youngest brother), my grandmother on his side, my great cousin and his wife on my mom’s side, and my grandmother on my moms side, and aunt on my moms side :D also according to my grandmother, I’m a dictator and I’m corrupting my sisters into hating her. Fml I’m so sorry, that sucks..I’m here to support you in any way I can at any time..I’m sorry this happened to you. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-85999 Share on other sites More sharing options...
TinyDinos Posted August 26, 2023 Author Share Posted August 26, 2023 11 hours ago, Coyotea said: I’m so sorry, that sucks..I’m here to support you in any way I can at any time..I’m sorry this happened to you. It’s okay. I’m just feeling it today, I’ll be alright tho 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/6971-dino%E2%80%99s-blog-2/page/2/#findComment-86014 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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