I want to know what I am

[Taya]

Hello, I’m new here. I don’t know why am here. I’ve been questioning myself a lot lately about who I am and who I want to be. I’ve asked a lot of friends they seem to say that I am probably gender fluid but I don’t even know what that means. I’ve spent a lot of my lifetime, avoiding gender roles And anything that involved gender with all the criticism and stereotypes. I’ve kept it to myself so that I would be able to avoid drama and anything that would cause conflict but here lately it’s been a lot on my mind I just wish I knew what I was before I was never able to say and except it.

[Catsup]

16 hours ago, Taya said:

Hello, I’m new here. I don’t know why am here. I’ve been questioning myself a lot lately about who I am and who I want to be. I’ve asked a lot of friends they seem to say that I am probably gender fluid but I don’t even know what that means. I’ve spent a lot of my lifetime, avoiding gender roles And anything that involved gender with all the criticism and stereotypes. I’ve kept it to myself so that I would be able to avoid drama and anything that would cause conflict but here lately it’s been a lot on my mind I just wish I knew what I was before I was never able to say and except it.

Hi, I'm Catsup, one of the support mentors here.  Welcome to Ditch the Label! 

It makes sense that you don't like gender stereotypes, since they can really be inaccurate for many people.  Avoiding gender roles can be related to not feeling fully connected to either male or female gender, but it can also mean you can see where gender roles don't work for everyone.  So it's possible you do not fit into a clear male or female gender (being non binary), and it's also possible you simply do not like the way society treats people based on their gender. 

Your friends have mentioned being gender fluid, which is one way of not being strictly male or female.  One of the ways to think about your identity is your pronouns.  Do you feel like you prefer being called a "he" or a "she"?  Or do you find neither makes you completely comfortable?

[Taya]

6 hours ago, Catsup said:

Hi, I'm Catsup, one of the support mentors here.  Welcome to Ditch the Label! 

It makes sense that you don't like gender stereotypes, since they can really be inaccurate for many people.  Avoiding gender roles can be related to not feeling fully connected to either male or female gender, but it can also mean you can see where gender roles don't work for everyone.  So it's possible you do not fit into a clear male or female gender (being non binary), and it's also possible you simply do not like the way society treats people based on their gender. 

Your friends have mentioned being gender fluid, which is one way of not being strictly male or female.  One of the ways to think about your identity is your pronouns.  Do you feel like you prefer being called a "he" or a "she"?  Or do you find neither makes you completely comfortable?

Honestly, neither one bothers me. If I’m being completely honest, a lot of my friends seem to say that I have both personalities or how I present myself in some form or fashion, but I didn’t even know what it meant, rather on the subject of genders or gender roles, or anything like it. 

[Catsup]

On 3/20/2023 at 12:09 AM, Taya said:

Honestly, neither one bothers me. If I’m being completely honest, a lot of my friends seem to say that I have both personalities or how I present myself in some form or fashion, but I didn’t even know what it meant, rather on the subject of genders or gender roles, or anything like it. 

That makes sense. It sounds to me like a lot of the questioning about your gender identity is coming from your friends.  Is this something that you still want help around figuring out for yourself?  If you are not bothered by figuring out your identity, you might not feel the need to think about it, but do let us know if there is more advice that you would like!