I have a crush on this girl.

[Vanessa_]

I realized not too long ago that I am bisexual and so far I have only come out to my sister and two friends of mine. Now I think I kind of have a crush on this girl who is one of the two friends I have told. I’m quite sure that she is straight because she didn’t mention anything when I came out to her and she constantly talks about boys. I don’t really know what to do because she is a good friend and we often talk about deep stuff and I therefore don’t want it to be awkward between us. But I think my feelings for her are getting worse. What should I do, does anyone have some advice?

[Jayla]

1 minute ago, Vanessa_ said:

I realized not too long ago that I am bisexual and so far I have only come out to my sister and two friends of mine. Now I think I kind of have a crush on this girl who is one of the two friends I have told. I’m quite sure that she is straight because she didn’t mention anything when I came out to her and she constantly talks about boys. I don’t really know what to do because she is a good friend and we often talk about deep stuff and I therefore don’t want it to be awkward between us. But I think my feelings for her are getting worse. What should I do, does anyone have some advice?

Maybe she’s scared to come out or she know she likes girls like that. maybe try bringing up the fact that ur feelings this girl like leave her mind wondering who it could be. ( i understand wht ur going as being bi) if she does like girls do you think the fact that yall have deep conversations will help or something?

[Vanessa_]

4 minutes ago, Everybody_luv_jae said:

Maybe she’s scared to come out or she know she likes girls like that. maybe try bringing up the fact that ur feelings this girl like leave her mind wondering who it could be. ( i understand wht ur going as being bi) if she does like girls do you think the fact that yall have deep conversations will help or something?

The thing is, I told her about this other girl I had a crush on and I don’t want her to think that I constantly have a crush on a girl. Also if I told her I have a crush on another girl she would try really hard to find out who the girl is. That is why I don’t know whether telling her I have an other crush would be good. About the having deep conversations, that is just one of the reasons I really don’t want to loose her and I don’t know if it would help if she did like girls too.

[Jayla]

1 minute ago, Vanessa_ said:

The thing is, I told her about this other girl I had a crush on and I don’t want her to think that I constantly have a crush on a girl. Also if I told her I have a crush on another girl she would try really hard to find out who the girl is. That is why I don’t know whether telling her I have an other crush would be good. About the having deep conversations, that is just one of the reasons I really don’t want to loose her and I don’t know if it would help if she did like girls too.

Damn, that makes it more complicated. maybe just lay it out on the table with her and if she wants to stop being friends or make it weird maybe that’s not the kind of friendship you want cus she show understand that it’s a crush and that you don’t want to make it weird between yall. but for some straight girls it’s hard for them to understand that?

[Vanessa_]

44 minutes ago, Everybody_luv_jae said:

Damn, that makes it more complicated. maybe just lay it out on the table with her and if she wants to stop being friends or make it weird maybe that’s not the kind of friendship you want cus she show understand that it’s a crush and that you don’t want to make it weird between yall. but for some straight girls it’s hard for them to understand that?

Thank you, I think that’s reasonable. I don’t know if she would understand. Maybe I‘ll wait and think about it for a bit. It’s just so annoying that every time I‘ve had a crush on a girl so far they were always straight :(

[Jayla]

7 hours ago, Vanessa_ said:

Thank you, I think that’s reasonable. I don’t know if she would understand. Maybe I‘ll wait and think about it for a bit. It’s just so annoying that every time I‘ve had a crush on a girl so far they were always straight :(

ik how you feel but you’ll probably grow out of it lol 

[Vanessa_]

1 hour ago, Everybody_luv_jae said:

ik how you feel but you’ll probably grow out of it lol 

Yeah maybe it’s better to keep her as a friend and wait for the crush to disappear.

[Jayla]

8 minutes ago, Vanessa_ said:

Yeah maybe it’s better to keep her as a friend and wait for the crush to disappear.

thats so true.

[Vanessa_]

So, for the last two days I‘ve tried ignoring my crush on my friend but it’s really difficult because I have a lot of free periods where I’m alone with her and I just can’t stop thinking of her in more than just a platonic way. Also I have come out to two other friends of mine and it was kind of weird. I like really wanted them to know and just told them in a really random situation. It was the first time where there weren’t any other people around and I felt like doing it and I just said it so I wouldn’t miss the chance. Then after there was this awkward silence and then one of them just said yeah, that was random or something and after we just changed the topic. I don’t know what to think of it because they didn’t really say anything. I mean it’s good that it hasn’t changed anything between us but I feel like they should have asked some questions or something. The other times I‘ve come out it made me feel better and more open but this time it wasn’t really like that.

[vi6]

hey vanessa! don't worry, sometimes when you come out, it can be very spontaneous and a lot for the people to comprehend! but it seems like they still accept you, which means things went really well! as for the crush, i hate to say it, but give it time! i'm sure if you and your friend are meant to be, things will work out somehow, but until then, treat it like a normal crush- because maybe that's all it is!

good luck!

[Vanessa_]

3 hours ago, vi6 said:

hey vanessa! don't worry, sometimes when you come out, it can be very spontaneous and a lot for the people to comprehend! but it seems like they still accept you, which means things went really well! as for the crush, i hate to say it, but give it time! i'm sure if you and your friend are meant to be, things will work out somehow, but until then, treat it like a normal crush- because maybe that's all it is!

good luck!

Thank you for the encouraging words and the advice. It’s good to hear that you think the coming out to my friends went well because I really wasn’t sure what I should think of it. Especially because my feeling was telling me it didn’t go really well although there wasn’t anything bad about their reaction. You’re also probably right about giving it time with my crush. It’s just easier said than done.