Olivia05 Posted May 2, 2023 Author Share Posted May 2, 2023 2 hours ago, SCARE said: Do we know what happened to Leila??? Any reason she'd delete her account???!!! Wait she deleted her account? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bisexual Soprano Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 7 hours ago, Equivalent Ways said: same tbh... and i feel it tho :/ ya here ro chat if u want... whenever I read about it I find that it is really really manipulative and I still cary a lot of it today :( Yeah, I'd love to chat. I've seen the effects of emotional abuse in myself but idk if my parents are intentionally doing it. I don't even know if any of their actions could be considered emotional abuse bc some sources say it's always intentional and others say it might not be. It's left me confused and upset. I also saw sonething that said abuse can be blocked out, and now I'm afraid that I may be blocking out abuse bc there are years that I don't remember much of at all. But I don't know if that's true or me imagining things :( MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivia05 Posted May 2, 2023 Author Share Posted May 2, 2023 I hate to change the subject but uhh…I came out to my mom…it was kinda by accident and my brother kinda outed me but that was easier than what I was overthinking about…but at least she knows now 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 25 minutes ago, Olivia05 said: I hate to change the subject but uhh…I came out to my mom…it was kinda by accident and my brother kinda outed me but that was easier than what I was overthinking about…but at least she knows now dont worry about it, holy crap yo thats...really cool.....? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivia05 Posted May 2, 2023 Author Share Posted May 2, 2023 1 minute ago, Equivalent Ways said: dont worry about it, holy crap yo thats...really cool.....? Yeah she saw me freaking out and like doing my hand gestures and everything when I don’t wanna have a convo and she’s like “it’s fine we support it” (the whole family was there) but yeah she knows now which idk how I feel abt it…I mean at least I don’t have to continuously tell my siblings to be quiet when they say things around the subject… MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 34 minutes ago, Bisexual Soprano said: Yeah, I'd love to chat. I've seen the effects of emotional abuse in myself but idk if my parents are intentionally doing it. I don't even know if any of their actions could be considered emotional abuse bc some sources say it's always intentional and others say it might not be. It's left me confused and upset. I also saw sonething that said abuse can be blocked out, and now I'm afraid that I may be blocking out abuse bc there are years that I don't remember much of at all. But I don't know if that's true or me imagining things :( oh yes I can see why you would be confused. I don't understand much about it myself, but the wars ppl react to trauma(as you might know) is 1)fight 2)freeze 3) flee & fawn I know i am personally freeze and flee, but keeping that in mind, one way of fleeing(?) is by dissociating, and part of THAT (lol) is dissociative amnesia.. kinda like how it sounds. ppl might be grapped or smth and not remember it cuz it was so traumatic that their brain blocked it out of survival. I fear too I have been doing that, but I just tell myself that I can unpack it if it is there, and to not worry about it ':) If it is intentional or not, it is still emotional abuse if they are abusing their power and manipulating your view of your emotions. Oftentimes these ppl can be in a self-fog mindset, so it may not be totally consciously done, but it is still a choice to keep emotionally abusing someone. And if it is deliberate, well, thats also really screwed up, but often it is in just a 'carless' to say it nicely, mindset. Alright, so that is a lot I hope its not too overwhelming! But I like chatting about this you see because I am proud of the studying and work I have done. and if it can be of help anyone else, that makes me very glad And I am here if you want to chat even more lol MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 10 minutes ago, Olivia05 said: Yeah she saw me freaking out and like doing my hand gestures and everything when I don’t wanna have a convo and she’s like “it’s fine we support it” (the whole family was there) but yeah she knows now which idk how I feel abt it…I mean at least I don’t have to continuously tell my siblings to be quiet when they say things around the subject… we like support and im glad cuz keeping secrets is freggin exhausting MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 (edited) Just now, Equivalent Ways said: we like support and im glad cuz keeping secrets is freggin exhausting lol sorry, did not mean the warning lol Edited May 2, 2023 by Equivalent Ways MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 no daggnit! no trigger warning needed XD MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bisexual Soprano Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 15 minutes ago, Equivalent Ways said: oh yes I can see why you would be confused. I don't understand much about it myself, but the wars ppl react to trauma(as you might know) is 1)fight 2)freeze 3) flee & fawn I know i am personally freeze and flee, but keeping that in mind, one way of fleeing(?) is by dissociating, and part of THAT (lol) is dissociative amnesia.. kinda like how it sounds. ppl might be grapped or smth and not remember it cuz it was so traumatic that their brain blocked it out of survival. I fear too I have been doing that, but I just tell myself that I can unpack it if it is there, and to not worry about it ':) If it is intentional or not, it is still emotional abuse if they are abusing their power and manipulating your view of your emotions. Oftentimes these ppl can be in a self-fog mindset, so it may not be totally consciously done, but it is still a choice to keep emotionally abusing someone. And if it is deliberate, well, thats also really screwed up, but often it is in just a 'carless' to say it nicely, mindset. Alright, so that is a lot I hope its not too overwhelming! But I like chatting about this you see because I am proud of the studying and work I have done. and if it can be of help anyone else, that makes me very glad And I am here if you want to chat even more lol Thanks :) I wish I had a way of understanding the truth, but my parents tend to skirt around subjects that make them uncomfortable, so idk how to bring up such a topic and not lose civility in the conversation. 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivia05 Posted May 2, 2023 Author Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 22 minutes ago, Equivalent Ways said: we like support and im glad cuz keeping secrets is freggin exhausting AGREED!!! 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 1 hour ago, Bisexual Soprano said: Thanks :) I wish I had a way of understanding the truth, but my parents tend to skirt around subjects that make them uncomfortable, so idk how to bring up such a topic and not lose civility in the conversation. you have an admirably clear view on this i wish to have a way of understanding the truth, but we are getting there I'm not sure how to talk with them about this stuff, but I have just tried being calm, and calling them on their bull, like just naming it. I feel you are getting agressive right now You are getting defensive right now etc anyway, ur doing great MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivia05 Posted May 2, 2023 Author Share Posted May 2, 2023 Lol I saw this TikTok where a guy was like y do girls use nicknames for guys like who tf is ‘pineapple’? i immediately was like oh no they found out!! And I saw this comment where it was like “yeah my friend and I r like ‘do you like sock or shoe?’ ‘No I like vase now’” I was like this is literally me and my friends r like “‘aww blackberry isn’t here…’ ‘wait aren’t u dating grape?’ ‘Yeah but I can still say I want blackberry to be here’” literally Z (blackberry) was walking to us and all he’s says “WHO TF RU TALKING ABT?!” All of the girls at the same time “NO ONE!” And we all started bursting out laughing and so now he knows I gotta bf…lol 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olivia05 Posted May 2, 2023 Author Share Posted May 2, 2023 Ugh moderation MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 1 hour ago, Olivia05 said: Ugh moderation yo that was hilarious yo!! I wish my family was not so weirded out and confused by my codes XD but yes MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emberfrost12 Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 16 hours ago, Bisexual Soprano said: Thanks :) I wish I had a way of understanding the truth, but my parents tend to skirt around subjects that make them uncomfortable, so idk how to bring up such a topic and not lose civility in the conversation. I feel that. It's why my parents have no idea of my trauma. 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emberfrost12 Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 17 hours ago, Equivalent Ways said: oh yes I can see why you would be confused. I don't understand much about it myself, but the ways ppl react to trauma(as you might know) is 1)fight 2)freeze 3) flee & fawn I know i am personally freeze and flee, but keeping that in mind, one way of fleeing(?) is by dissociating, and part of THAT (lol) is dissociative amnesia.. kinda like how it sounds. ppl might be grapped or smth and not remember it cuz it was so traumatic that their brain blocked it out of survival. I fear too I have been doing that, but I just tell myself that I can unpack it if it is there, and to not worry about it ':) If it is intentional or not, it is still emotional abuse if they are abusing their power and manipulating your view of your emotions. Oftentimes these ppl can be in a self-fog mindset, so it may not be totally consciously done, but it is still a choice to keep emotionally abusing someone. And if it is deliberate, well, thats also really screwed up, but often it is in just a 'carless' to say it nicely, mindset. Alright, so that is a lot I hope its not too overwhelming! But I like chatting about this you see because I am proud of the studying and work I have done. and if it can be of help anyone else, that makes me very glad And I am here if you want to chat even more lol Ok, I have an amount of dissociative amnesia, and yes, my general reaction is to flee or fawn. What I've found is that generally, something can often point to a blank spot in memory; For me, I can remember events that don't entirely make sense. While this may not work for you, try and think of any reactions you've had to something that happened that seem over the top or unnecessary. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emberfrost12 Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 19 hours ago, Olivia05 said: Wait she deleted her account? Evidently... @Deleted account doesn't seem like a name she'd choose and she hasn't been around for a bit. Also, some of her settings have been changed, like 'show recent profile views' MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emberfrost12 Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 21 hours ago, Equivalent Ways said: I'm sorry, idk what you mean, I can't find her account and see what is going on :C @Deleted account MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emberfrost12 Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 18 hours ago, Olivia05 said: I hate to change the subject but uhh…I came out to my mom…it was kinda by accident and my brother kinda outed me but that was easier than what I was overthinking about…but at least she knows now Well, congrats :) MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 6 minutes ago, SCARE said: Evidently... @Deleted account doesn't seem like a name she'd choose and she hasn't been around for a bit. Also, some of her settings have been changed, like 'show recent profile views' ah, I hope she is ok :) she can talk if she needs help MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 16 minutes ago, SCARE said: Ok, I have an amount of dissociative amnesia, and yes, my general reaction is to flee or fawn. What I've found is that generally, something can often point to a blank spot in memory; For me, I can remember events that don't entirely make sense. While this may not work for you, try and think of any reactions you've had to something that happened that seem over the top or unnecessary. yeye well said, its very interesting to figure this stuff out. sometimes the only way to find out is questioning a reaction that seems too...weird, its true. It has helped me get some realizations :P 1 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emberfrost12 Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 3 minutes ago, Equivalent Ways said: ah, I hope she is ok :) she can talk if she needs help Thing is she can't, if her profile is deleted. Or at least that's what I assume :( MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emberfrost12 Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 2 minutes ago, Equivalent Ways said: yeye well said, its very interesting to figure this stuff out. sometimes the only way to find out is questioning a reaction that seems too...weird, its true. It has helped me get some realizations :P I'll admit it, it took me a very long time to spot the anomalies MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted May 2, 2023 Share Posted May 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Trauma Click this notice to reveal the content. 10 minutes ago, SCARE said: I'll admit it, it took me a very long time to spot the anomalies Oh very very true, sometimes i still miss them lol. But like, i guess it just has to take a while, cuz its hard work haha! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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