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How to differentiate friendships from relationships?


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Hi! Okay, so this is something that I am genuinely curious about. Where do you draw the line between a friendship and a relationship?

For context: oftentimes when I make friends, I grow really close personal connections with one person as I find it easier than group settings. This means that we'll often hang out just the two of us. It ranges from something really chill, like hanging out at my place, to going to the movies or on picnics. These are activities I've done in groups of friends, but can now admit are more 'date like' activities. Which one-on-one activities aren't though? It's not like we're going to candle lit dinner's!! Anyway, I've always thought that the only difference between friends and dating was intimacy (like hand holding and kissing), but now on I have lost friends on more than one occasion, only to realize that they may have had a crush on me, a year later. I am just a bit too dense to notice it at the time!

It's not like I wouldn't have been interested in dating them, either! I have just grown up believing it's better to have friends than to have relationships that may end. But seeing as they have ended anyway, I'd really like to know when it's worth taking the risk of asking them out. 

I've never been asked out but like I said about a year after someone likes me, I find out. I really can't read social cues though, so I need to be told, or the situation just has to be so obvious that I can't deny it. So, of course I haven't asked anyone out either... (to be fair I can be a bit of a wuss too... 😅)

Anyway, I am interested in getting into the dating scene, but how do you even do that?  Like when do you think to yourself, "Yes this person may want to be more than just a friend!"

Hahaha, this is such a mess, but I'd appreciate some advice!

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it isn't a mess! you should see mine 🙂  you can hold hands while friends i think.. you loosing friends isn't your fault.  that's understandable. don't rush into things and maybe work out your typr and think sensibly so that you find the right one to you that won't leave you in heart break due to you being awesome! @nickname

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1 minute ago, Lillyrose4 said:

it isn't a mess! you should see mine 🙂  you can hold hands while friends i think.. you loosing friends isn't your fault.  that's understandable. don't rush into things and maybe work out your typr and think sensibly so that you find the right one to you that won't leave you in heart break due to you being awesome! @nickname

see that's the thing, I feel like I can't really define my type by looks (like it's set of personality traits and interests)... idk if that makes sense. if it's not too personal, what's your type?

also!! that!! not blaming yourself for loosing friends is so difficult! but it's definitely something I'm working on. :))  

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2 minutes ago, nickname said:

see that's the thing, I feel like I can't really define my type by looks (like it's set of personality traits and interests)... idk if that makes sense. if it's not too personal, what's your type?

also!! that!! not blaming yourself for loosing friends is so difficult! but it's definitely something I'm working on. :))  

my type? kind, supports one another encourages good behaviour and loyal! you male or female? and awwww

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39 minutes ago, Lillyrose4 said:

my type? kind, supports one another encourages good behaviour and loyal! you male or female? and awwww

hahaha, those are sweet qualities (I guess you also have a list of traits as opposed to physical features). tbh I don't really get your question... at the moment I'm sticking with unlabeled for my sexuality, but I'm a guy. hbu? 

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1 minute ago, nickname said:

hahaha, those are sweet qualities (I guess you also have a list of traits as opposed to physical features). tbh I don't really get your question... at the moment I'm sticking with unlabeled for my sexuality, but I'm a guy. hbu? 

girl 🙂 And, I think it's about personality then looks 🙂 

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Just now, Lillyrose4 said:

girl 🙂 And, I think it's about personality then looks 🙂 

hahaha, yeah that's fair. I guess it's personality, interest, looks and vibes all meshed together. (they also have to think you're a swell person too)

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5 minutes ago, Lillyrose4 said:

ouch that hurt 😭

what??? how?!!! I was referring to being funny!! 🤣 also idk why it sent that deadpan smile, I meant to send a typed one, like this: :)) 

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1 minute ago, nickname said:

what??? how?!!! I was referring to being funny!! 🤣 also idk why it sent that deadpan smile, I meant to send a typed one, like this: :)) 

ah good don't throw me out just yet not that dull lol 😉 

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1 minute ago, Lillyrose4 said:

ah good don't throw me out just yet not that dull lol 😉 

BAHAHAHAH!!! I JUST GOT WHAT YOU UNDERSTOOD!!!! nooooo!!! I didn't mean that you had to live up to me at all!! OoO

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  • Digital Mentor
20 hours ago, nickname said:

Hi! Okay, so this is something that I am genuinely curious about. Where do you draw the line between a friendship and a relationship?

For context: oftentimes when I make friends, I grow really close personal connections with one person as I find it easier than group settings. This means that we'll often hang out just the two of us. It ranges from something really chill, like hanging out at my place, to going to the movies or on picnics. These are activities I've done in groups of friends, but can now admit are more 'date like' activities. Which one-on-one activities aren't though? It's not like we're going to candle lit dinner's!! Anyway, I've always thought that the only difference between friends and dating was intimacy (like hand holding and kissing), but now on I have lost friends on more than one occasion, only to realize that they may have had a crush on me, a year later. I am just a bit too dense to notice it at the time!

It's not like I wouldn't have been interested in dating them, either! I have just grown up believing it's better to have friends than to have relationships that may end. But seeing as they have ended anyway, I'd really like to know when it's worth taking the risk of asking them out. 

I've never been asked out but like I said about a year after someone likes me, I find out. I really can't read social cues though, so I need to be told, or the situation just has to be so obvious that I can't deny it. So, of course I haven't asked anyone out either... (to be fair I can be a bit of a wuss too... 😅)

Anyway, I am interested in getting into the dating scene, but how do you even do that?  Like when do you think to yourself, "Yes this person may want to be more than just a friend!"

Hahaha, this is such a mess, but I'd appreciate some advice!

Hey there 🙂

I think that doing all of those things with a friend is completely normal, but I guess that each friendship is different, and if someone has some kind of feelings towards you, then that can lead to things getting messy  I guess! I'm thinking, it might be a good idea to flip the question back onto you. I'm wondering, when you like someone, how might you treat them differently in comparison to a friend? 

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

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15 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there 🙂

I think that doing all of those things with a friend is completely normal, but I guess that each friendship is different, and if someone has some kind of feelings towards you, then that can lead to things getting messy  I guess! I'm thinking, it might be a good idea to flip the question back onto you. I'm wondering, when you like someone, how might you treat them differently in comparison to a friend? 

Hi! See, I thought that too. To answer your question, I don't necessarily act different. It stems from the fact that at first my approach was avoiding the person I liked at all costs, now it's evolved to me treating them like friends, I just get more flustered (even more than normally), so I'm a terrible person to base it off. Then again I'm not always very private about the people I like, so idk...

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey there,

That's okay. So, I think that there are plenty of signs that someone might like you. This can include them checking you out, flirting, wanting to spend time with you alone, getting jealous, being nervous around you, etc. Do you think there might be other signs too? 

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

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