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Unsupportive friend


Asher
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Hey, it’s me again. I came out to my best friend as pan and nonbinary a couple of weeks ago, and she made it clear that she doesn’t support this part of me but will still love and support me in every other part of my life. The thing is… all I really want is a friend who can relate to what I’m going through that I can talk about this stuff with without judgement. I asked her just now if she thinks there’s even a slight chance that she’ll ever support me in the future… and she said no. She didn’t give a reason, just a  simple “no”. Who knew a single word could hurt so much? I guess I brought this onto myself… I asked her the question even though I kinda already knew the answer. All I’m asking for rn is some kind words from a stranger I guess. I want someone to tell me that everything’s going to be ok, because at this moment, I don’t have anyone to tell me that in real life.

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey @Asher

Thank you for opening up to us about this. I'm sorry to hear that she has said that she cannot support you again. I cannot imagine how hurtful this is for you, but i'm glad that you're speaking about how you feel as this will help you to move forward. Coming out is a very scary thing to do, and when people aren't supportive, like your friend, it can make us feel alone on this journey. I just want you to know that we are here for you, and although we don't know you in real life, you can talk to us about absolutely anything. I know it might not seem like it now, but this journey does get easier for most people. There might be more people along the way who react like this, but in a way, it shows you who is really going to be there for you, and can strengthen other relationships in your life. What do you think? I hope you feel better soon. Take care. 

digital-mentor.png.37594766624d87064910e

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  • 1 month later...

Hey, just wanted to say that you're strong and wonderful.  Coming out is super hard and it sucks that she wasn't supportive.  Friends support each other in every way, not picking and choosing.  I promise there's better things out there and great people you have yet to meet.  Sending good vibes your way :) <3

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 10/27/2021 at 6:44 PM, Hestia said:

Hey, just wanted to say that you're strong and wonderful.  Coming out is super hard and it sucks that she wasn't supportive.  Friends support each other in every way, not picking and choosing.  I promise there's better things out there and great people you have yet to meet.  Sending good vibes your way :) <3

Thanks Hestia, that means a lot! I’m doing a lot better actually, though it still hurts to be around her sometimes. It sucks to know that someone who you considered to be your closest friend may never really understand or support you. But on a brighter note, I found some people that fully accept me as I am! They’re all really awesome, and I’m super happy that I met them. I feel like I can really be myself around them, and it’s refreshing to not always have to put up an act when I’m with them.

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