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How Do I Come Out?!?!


atmf011    

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Ok, so basically I am a 13 year old kid called Alex and I want to come out. I am bisexual and my parents have always said to me I can date who I want. They would be fine with it, it is just that I get kind of anxious talking. How should I come out to them? Like if they are watching TV should I just walk in and say? Like, I am kind of lost here. I think I am ready and I really want to tell them for Pride Month but like would I tell that at dinner or like where and when? Sry for the trouble, I also have another question. How do I come out to my REALLY close friends also? I feel like they will be accepting but one of them I am not sure about. I have another friend that is bi and only told him. Should I come out with him around? Should I text my friends in a group chat? (basically how do I tell friends and fam that I am bi).

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Hey @atmf011

Welcome to our community. I'm one of the digital mentors here and I give advice to our members who reach out to us. It's great to hear that you want to come out and that your parents have always said you can date who you want. I totally get your nerves - even though you're highly likely to have a positive experience, it's still pretty daunting, and that's perfectly normal to feel. I guess there are loads of different ways to come out, but I'm wondering, would you rather do it face-to-face or write a letter/message/email? People find that not doing it face-to-face helps with their nerves. Let me know about this for coming out to both your friends and parents, and then we can go from there.

Speak soon 👍

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Hey @atmf011

I guess you could still write them a letter and leave it for them to read when you go out? Also, for your friends, I guess you could message them? It might work better doing it 1:1 though rather than the whole group at the same time. What do you think?

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Ok, I think I will do it like that with my parents. I may even bake a cake and leave a note on it lol. I might still tell all of my friends at the same time bc I already told one and I only have 2 other friends (lol). Anyways, tysm!

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  • Ditch the Label Staff
12 hours ago, Koala girl said:

Hi 

I really need to tell my Dad that am bisexual but have no idea how to. I also want to tell my friends. But where and how? Can you help?

Hey @Koala girl can I ask is there is a specific reason you need to tell you dad now? I fully understand that it can feel really daunting but it's your journey and you should only ever do it in your own time and not feel pressured to say anything before you feel ready.

How do you normally get on with your dad? Do you have any idea of how you think he'll react? Let me know and we can work it out together :)    

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On 6/11/2021 at 9:40 AM, Monsoon said:

Hey @atmf011

I guess you could still write them a letter and leave it for them to read when you go out? Also, for your friends, I guess you could message them? It might work better doing it 1:1 though rather than the whole group at the same time. What do you think?

I want to do that leaving a note for my parents and sister as I can't work up the courage to say it in person even though I know they will be fully supportive lol

Don't know when tho

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11 hours ago, MoonieOwl said:

I want to do that leaving a note for my parents and sister as I can't work up the courage to say it in person even though I know they will be fully supportive lol

Don't know when tho

Hey,

That's great that they will be fully supportive, but yeah, I still completely get that it can be nerve wracking; just try to take comfort knowing that they will respond positively. 

Also, in terms of when to do it, just do it at a time that feels right for you. You don't have to rush it - this is your journey and you get to decide at which pace you go. What do you think? 

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1 hour ago, Blue22031 said:

i just wrote in my diary that i was bi and my mum went in my room to tidy it for me when i was at school and she just found it and read it lol

That seems easy lol

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3 hours ago, Blue22031 said:

lol yep.  But I never thought she would read it oh well she was fine about it and she still is

I want it to be that easy 😫

I might do some cool art saying it and leave it open so that when someone comes in they see and boom!

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Actually ij feel quite ok with actually doing it but then I dont think Im ready for the questions after wards and the slight awkwardness even though I know they'll be supportive...........

does anyone know any way I can make it less awkward? 

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  • Ditch the Label Staff

Sometimes a more casual 'side by side' conversation if you're just hanging out together can feel less intense than asking to discuss something with them. Do you think that could work?  

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