Mental Heath slowly dieing

[Huxley]

Its been awhile since I've posted or even been on this site.... It's been a tough few weeks (or months) which brings me to this post. Has anyone ever felt like they're needed and important but yet then everything just seems to be against you and your alone and everyone hates you? No? well maybe its just me, but some days are good but others just seem like I'm the odd one out. In school we have this class where we basically are like the news and we run the school paper and the announcements. And in said class I do everything I put too much effort into that class and nobody even looks my way or they do but just briefly before giving someone else praise for something that i taught them. I keep burning myself out and now I'm taking breaks so I don't get burnt out but I still feel not seen. I also have T1D and some days people give a bunch of shit for it even though its not something that i can control. And another thing is I always keep my emotions in because why would someone else need to have that to even think abt when its my problems.. I think my mental health is slowly dieing and just getting worse some days I just plaster on a smile and repeat "don't cry dont cry".

[Aurora]

11 hours ago, Huxley said:

Its been awhile since I've posted or even been on this site.... It's been a tough few weeks (or months) which brings me to this post. Has anyone ever felt like they're needed and important but yet then everything just seems to be against you and your alone and everyone hates you? No? well maybe its just me, but some days are good but others just seem like I'm the odd one out. In school we have this class where we basically are like the news and we run the school paper and the announcements. And in said class I do everything I put too much effort into that class and nobody even looks my way or they do but just briefly before giving someone else praise for something that i taught them. I keep burning myself out and now I'm taking breaks so I don't get burnt out but I still feel not seen. I also have T1D and some days people give a bunch of shit for it even though its not something that i can control. And another thing is I always keep my emotions in because why would someone else need to have that to even think abt when its my problems.. I think my mental health is slowly dieing and just getting worse some days I just plaster on a smile and repeat "don't cry dont cry".

Hi @Huxley, thanks for reaching out and letting us know what's going on for you. It does sound like you're having a tough time recently and I'm sorry to hear that .  I know what you mean by feeling like everything and everyone is against you and feeling alone. I have experienced this quite a few times myself. Usually it's not one big thing but lots of little things that made me feel like that. Is that the same for you? The last few times this happened to me, I made a conscious effort to try and notice when either someone was being nice or friendly towards me or where something has gone my way. Even if it's just something really, really small. I find that when I get the feeling that the whole world is against me I tend to fixate on all the things that are going wrong and I don't really notice all the other stuff around me that is happening. By trying to shift my focus a little, this often helps me to feel differently again.

I think it's really impressive that you are getting so involved in your school news class. Is this something that interests you? It sounds like you are really good at it, too. I'm sorry that you aren't getting any recognition for it though. That does seem unfair. Sometimes, when people are really good at something they do tend to get less recognition. I think teachers in particular, tend to focus more on those who are struggling or not putting in the effort, because they want to motivate them. And I think this can rub off on class mates as well. We then end up trying to encourage those who aren't as focussed or engaged and we forget about those who are putting in all the extra effort. Do you think that might be the reason, why you don't get much praise yourself in that class? How would you about mentioning this to your teacher (if you have a teacher for that class)? It might be good for them to hear that you don't feel like all your efforts are being noticed. 

I'm glad to hear that you are taking breaks now. Does that make a difference at all in how you are feeling?

From what you've been telling us I get the impression that you could do with someone to talk to. Is that right? You mentioned about always keeping your emotions in and that you don't want others to have to think about your problems.  However, it does sound like this might be affecting your wellbeing. Would you agree? I'm wondering, if you had a friend, who was keeping their emotions in, would you want them to talk to you about it or would you prefer it, if they kept their feelings to themself? 

Thanks again for reaching out - we're here for you!