What is neurodivergency

[Emberfrost12]

A few days ago, I opened a survey (If you haven't taken it, it's right here https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/blogs/entry/462-another-survey-to-please-take/) to see where we could use some new content. The most obvious thing I found is that neurodivergency is not a thing all of us are confident in our knowledge of. So, I'm going to write a post about it and see if I can make this less of a post that should've been a blog, and more a post where where we can actually have a discussion. (And now I'm going to put headphones on so I don't have to listen to the guy next to me watching a video or tv show with someone gambling. Or is he gambling himself?).

So, what is neurodivergency? The roundabout definition that someone could give you is that 'neurodivergency is when you aren't neurotypical.' Great, that's a super unhelpful definition. A more helpful one could be 'neurodivergency is when someone's thinking patterns differ from what's typical.' And now we're getting somewhere. Things like attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and autism-spectrum disorder (ASD) are the most famous types of neurodivergency. A few others are obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, and Dyscalculia. Some of these are better recognized, and some have red spellcheck lines underneath them despite the fact that they are real (and spelled correctly). 

ADHD is definitely one of the better known ones. Adhd has three main factors- inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. You can have adhd with mostly inattentive patterns (ADHD-I), and you can have adhd that is primarily hyperactive (ADHD-H).  You can also have adhd with all three. The main negative impacts of adhd is that it can be hard to focus, it can feel wrong or unnatural to be still or in one place for too long, and it can make it harder to think things through before doing those things. ADHD is the kind of thing that you have for your whole life- it generally shows up when you're quite young and it isn't something that can be 'cured'

Autism-spectrum disorder is the all-encompassing term for autism. More specific terms are largely out of use, as they can be hurtful to some people. Some terms like 'asperger's' are out of use due to unpleasant origins (that one specifically originates from Nazi Germany), and should generally only be used if someone else says it in relation to themself first. Autism is a developmental disorder that also cannot be 'cured'

A few things you can do to help neurodivergent people in your life is to give them clear instructions when you need them to do something (don't assume that they automatically know how you like something done. Also, 'clear' does not mean 'like you're talking to a child'). Entertain the interests and fixations that come with autism and adhd, and do your best to not disrupt any routines or habits. 

To be absolutely clear, neurodivergency is not a necessarily negative thing. It can have some negative parts, but it can make some things easier, and it by no means makes anyone lesser. There are actually quite a few notable people in history who definitely were neurodivergent. Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, and Jim Carrey are a few examples of neurodivergent people who definitely weren't lesser for their neurodivergency. I repeat, neurodivergency is not a negative thing. I myself am neurodivergent, and I am not suffering for it. 

Hope this is helpful for someone :)

-Em =)

 

Edited November 14, 2023 by Emberfrost12

[Duckie]

1 hour ago, Emberfrost12 said:

A few days ago, I opened a survey (If you haven't taken it, it's right here https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/blogs/entry/462-another-survey-to-please-take/) to see where we could use some new content. The most obvious thing I found is that neurodivergency is not a thing all of us are confident in our knowledge of. So, I'm going to write a post about it and see if I can make this less of a post that should've been a blog, and more a post where where we can actually have a discussion. (And now I'm going to put headphones on so I don't have to listen to the guy next to me watching a video or tv show with someone gambling. Or is he gambling himself?).

So, what is neurodivergency? The roundabout definition that someone could give you is that 'neurodivergency is when you aren't neurotypical.' Great, that's a super unhelpful definition. A more helpful one could be 'neurodivergency is when someone's thinking patterns differ from what's typical.' And now we're getting somewhere. Things like attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and autism-spectrum disorder (ASD) are the most famous types of neurodivergency. A few others are obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, and Dyscalculia. Some of these are better recognized, and some have red spellcheck lines underneath them despite the fact that they are real (and spelled correctly). 

ADHD is definitely one of the better known ones. Adhd has three main factors- inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. You can have adhd with mostly inattentive patterns (ADHD-I), and you can have adhd that is primarily hyperactive (ADHD-H).  You can also have adhd with all three. The main negative impacts of adhd is that it can be hard to focus, it can feel wrong or unnatural to be still or in one place for too long, and it can make it harder to think things through before doing those things. ADHD is the kind of thing that you have for your whole life- it generally shows up when you're quite young and it isn't something that can be 'cured'

Autism-spectrum disorder is the all-encompassing term for autism. More specific terms are largely out of use, as they can be hurtful to some people. Some terms like 'asperger's' are out of use due to unpleasant origins (that one specifically originates from Nazi Germany), and should generally only be used if someone else says it in relation to themself first. Autism is a developmental disorder that also cannot be 'cured'

A few things you can do to help neurodivergent people in your life is to give them clear instructions when you need them to do something (don't assume that they automatically know how you like something done. Also, 'clear' does not mean 'like you're talking to a child'). Entertain the interests and fixations that come with autism and adhd, and do your best to not disrupt any routines or habits. 

To be absolutely clear, neurodivergency is not a necessarily negative thing. It can have some negative parts, but it can make some things easier, and it by no means makes anyone lesser. There are actually quite a few notable people in history who definitely were neurodivergent. Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, and Jim Carrey are a few examples of neurodivergent people who definitely weren't lesser for their neurodivergency. I repeat, neurodivergency is not a negative thing. I myself am neurodivergent, and I am not suffering for it. 

Hope this is helpful for someone :)

-Em =)

Thank you for starting this post, @Emberfrost12,

I feel that this is such an important conversation to have in order to raise awareness and to share experiences. My dad is autistic - born in a time when diagnosing neurodiversities wasn't a common practice, or even that well known of - and a lot of times people will still assume that he is rude or unfriendly (because of his directness and same tone of voice) and many times I have found him upset saying things like "I wish people just listened to what I said rather than how I said it". The one thing I will always appreciate with my dad is that he says things the way they are rather than giving unclear, sugarcoated answers - even if the answers can be harsh sometimes. He is very aware of his condition and as such he is open to hear advise, even though he doesn't always understand what it entails. He is really funny too, with the way his timing is sometimes a bit off and the way he doesn't understand sarcasm and other less obvious social queues. Being allistic and growing up with an autistic dad was valuable in many ways. I wouldn't have changed him for the world. He did what he thought was right and he has a strong sense of justice, which I like to think I have too 

[Emberfrost12]

1 minute ago, Duckie said:

Thank you for starting this post, @Emberfrost12,

I feel that this is such an important conversation to have in order to raise awareness and to share experiences. My dad is autistic - born in a time when diagnosing neurodiversities wasn't a common practice, or even that well known of - and a lot of times people will still assume that he is rude or unfriendly (because of his directness and same tone of voice) and many times I have found him upset saying things like "I wish people just listened to what I said rather than how I said it". The one thing I will always appreciate with my dad is that he says things the way they are rather than giving unclear, sugarcoated answers - even if the answers can be harsh sometimes. He is very aware of his condition and as such he is open to hear advise, even though he doesn't always understand what it entails. He is really funny too, with the way his timing is sometimes a bit off and the way he doesn't understand sarcasm and other less obvious social queues. Being allistic and growing up with an autistic dad was valuable in many ways. I wouldn't have changed him for the world. He did what he thought was right and he has a strong sense of justice, which I like to think I have too 

I repeat, my reactions and posts on this site don't come from me being awkward and half-posting...

The 'I wish people just listened to what I said rather than how I said it' is something I can relate to, but at the same time, I'm a person who does the exact opposite, I listen to tone and not words much of the time, and yet, I have a tendency to tell people their ideas are terrible and just hope they understand from my tone of voice that I'm not attacking them (oops)

not sugarcoating is definitely a neurodivergent tendency I appreciate. Harsh is often better than fake. 

I unfortunately also can mistake sarcasm, especially with people I'm not super familiar with, and it's comedic, more so for me and my friends than the poor person who was trying to make a joke.....they all just are confused as to why I didn't get that the comment was meant in sarcasm

A strong sense of justice is always valuable :)

[Megs-]

38 minutes ago, Duckie said:

Thank you for starting this post, @Emberfrost12,

I feel that this is such an important conversation to have in order to raise awareness and to share experiences. My dad is autistic - born in a time when diagnosing neurodiversities wasn't a common practice, or even that well known of - and a lot of times people will still assume that he is rude or unfriendly (because of his directness and same tone of voice) and many times I have found him upset saying things like "I wish people just listened to what I said rather than how I said it". The one thing I will always appreciate with my dad is that he says things the way they are rather than giving unclear, sugarcoated answers - even if the answers can be harsh sometimes. He is very aware of his condition and as such he is open to hear advise, even though he doesn't always understand what it entails. He is really funny too, with the way his timing is sometimes a bit off and the way he doesn't understand sarcasm and other less obvious social queues. Being allistic and growing up with an autistic dad was valuable in many ways. I wouldn't have changed him for the world. He did what he thought was right and he has a strong sense of justice, which I like to think I have too 

My brother is Autistic too!! 

[catgal05]

4 hours ago, Emberfrost12 said:

A few days ago, I opened a survey (If you haven't taken it, it's right here https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/blogs/entry/462-another-survey-to-please-take/) to see where we could use some new content. The most obvious thing I found is that neurodivergency is not a thing all of us are confident in our knowledge of. So, I'm going to write a post about it and see if I can make this less of a post that should've been a blog, and more a post where where we can actually have a discussion. (And now I'm going to put headphones on so I don't have to listen to the guy next to me watching a video or tv show with someone gambling. Or is he gambling himself?).

So, what is neurodivergency? The roundabout definition that someone could give you is that 'neurodivergency is when you aren't neurotypical.' Great, that's a super unhelpful definition. A more helpful one could be 'neurodivergency is when someone's thinking patterns differ from what's typical.' And now we're getting somewhere. Things like attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and autism-spectrum disorder (ASD) are the most famous types of neurodivergency. A few others are obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, and Dyscalculia. Some of these are better recognized, and some have red spellcheck lines underneath them despite the fact that they are real (and spelled correctly). 

ADHD is definitely one of the better known ones. Adhd has three main factors- inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. You can have adhd with mostly inattentive patterns (ADHD-I), and you can have adhd that is primarily hyperactive (ADHD-H).  You can also have adhd with all three. The main negative impacts of adhd is that it can be hard to focus, it can feel wrong or unnatural to be still or in one place for too long, and it can make it harder to think things through before doing those things. ADHD is the kind of thing that you have for your whole life- it generally shows up when you're quite young and it isn't something that can be 'cured'

Autism-spectrum disorder is the all-encompassing term for autism. More specific terms are largely out of use, as they can be hurtful to some people. Some terms like 'asperger's' are out of use due to unpleasant origins (that one specifically originates from Nazi Germany), and should generally only be used if someone else says it in relation to themself first. Autism is a developmental disorder that also cannot be 'cured'

A few things you can do to help neurodivergent people in your life is to give them clear instructions when you need them to do something (don't assume that they automatically know how you like something done. Also, 'clear' does not mean 'like you're talking to a child'). Entertain the interests and fixations that come with autism and adhd, and do your best to not disrupt any routines or habits. 

To be absolutely clear, neurodivergency is not a necessarily negative thing. It can have some negative parts, but it can make some things easier, and it by no means makes anyone lesser. There are actually quite a few notable people in history who definitely were neurodivergent. Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, and Jim Carrey are a few examples of neurodivergent people who definitely weren't lesser for their neurodivergency. I repeat, neurodivergency is not a negative thing. I myself am neurodivergent, and I am not suffering for it. 

Hope this is helpful for someone :)

-Em =)

I know some friends with these too.

I have dyscalcula myself.

 

[Duckie]

13 hours ago, Emberfrost12 said:

I repeat, my reactions and posts on this site don't come from me being awkward and half-posting...

The 'I wish people just listened to what I said rather than how I said it' is something I can relate to, but at the same time, I'm a person who does the exact opposite, I listen to tone and not words much of the time, and yet, I have a tendency to tell people their ideas are terrible and just hope they understand from my tone of voice that I'm not attacking them (oops)

not sugarcoating is definitely a neurodivergent tendency I appreciate. Harsh is often better than fake. 

I unfortunately also can mistake sarcasm, especially with people I'm not super familiar with, and it's comedic, more so for me and my friends than the poor person who was trying to make a joke.....they all just are confused as to why I didn't get that the comment was meant in sarcasm

A strong sense of justice is always valuable :)

I really appreciate the honesty and not sugarcoating things. I think in general there's a high level of awareness amongst neurodivergent people that they know how they can come across and are mindful of that. My best friend has ADHD and I will always appreciate how clear both her and my dad have been with me. They will say straight out "that upsets me" or "are you mad at me?" rather than being distant and expecting anyone to guess what's up. It's something I've learned a lot from to be honest.

[Emberfrost12]

6 hours ago, Duckie said:

I really appreciate the honesty and not sugarcoating things. I think in general there's a high level of awareness amongst neurodivergent people that they know how they can come across and are mindful of that. My best friend has ADHD and I will always appreciate how clear both her and my dad have been with me. They will say straight out "that upsets me" or "are you mad at me?" rather than being distant and expecting anyone to guess what's up. It's something I've learned a lot from to be honest.

I have ADHD but I tend to avoid any problems until I actively want them to start a fight, and then I get confrontational. It's not a great way to deal with things . Also, no one seems to want to get into arguments with me....so I end up just solving the problem. I guess I do tend to be super direct about some things though :)

[Duckie]

17 hours ago, Emberfrost12 said:

I have ADHD but I tend to avoid any problems until I actively want them to start a fight, and then I get confrontational. It's not a great way to deal with things . Also, no one seems to want to get into arguments with me....so I end up just solving the problem. I guess I do tend to be super direct about some things though :)

I imagine this can be quite tricky to nagivate at times. My best friend says similar things. She's basically always been taught to take a few seconds to breathe and to not jump from thought to reaction, and to "not start things" unnecessarily. But this sometimes means that the people who actually go too far aren't told off until she is absolutely fuming. But she rarely feels confident enough to trust her feelings. She tends to take it out on herself instead unfortunately. Horrible in a way that she's been taught she's not entitled to her feelings - I think it may be something a lot of people with ADHD might have been taught at some point. I still want her to stand up for herself, but she just feels like she can't unless it gets really personal and there are no doubts she is being insulted.

 

[Braveheart]

Hi I'm new to Ditch the Label but this is really really helpful I'm autistic but have received a lot of negative things said towards me because of differences over the years and have recently been enduring the pain of being bullied because of being different but thank you for sharing that being Neurodivergent isn't necessarily something that should be viewed as being negative

[Duckie]

9 minutes ago, Braveheart said:

Hi I'm new to Ditch the Label but this is really really helpful I'm autistic but have received a lot of negative things said towards me because of differences over the years and have recently been enduring the pain of being bullied because of being different but thank you for sharing that being Neurodivergent isn't necessarily something that should be viewed as being negative

Hi @Braveheart,

Welcome to Ditch the Label. Very happy to have you hear with us  my name is Duckie and I'm one of the support mentors.

I am so happy you're finding this post helpful! So am I. I am so sorry to hear that you are hearing a lot of negative things about your neurodiversity and that you have been bullied. We are here for you if you want to talk about it - either here on the forum or on Confidential Support (top centre of this page). I agree that we need to be more positive about neurodiversities. Honestly some of the most influential people in my life are all neurodivergent and they have taught me so much about myself and about how to cope with things in general. My dad is autistic and he was always my rock growing up - always logical and honest and calculated. And my grandpa was from the generation where diagnosis wasn't a thing and he was always bullied for having an interest in trains (trains only). And then he became one of the best train engineers in the country. But I digress 

[Braveheart]

Hi @Duckie 

thanks for the warm welcome and thanks for sharing this I have always struggled to have confidence in myself growing up and that's always led to struggles to stand up for myself over the years because I've always grown up believing that being Neurodivergent is something to be ashamed of and people have always told me that there is something wrong with me but this is really helping me to see things in a different light and a different perspective and I definitely think having some mentors to guide me further in my journey will be a really big help in building my self confidence levels to have the confidence in learning how to stand up for myself against the negative things people say about me and thanks for sharing about role models I've never really had any role models growing up so I think having people who can inspire me will be hugely beneficial as well

[Duckie]

5 minutes ago, Braveheart said:

Hi @Duckie 

thanks for the warm welcome and thanks for sharing this I have always struggled to have confidence in myself growing up and that's always led to struggles to stand up for myself over the years because I've always grown up believing that being Neurodivergent is something to be ashamed of and people have always told me that there is something wrong with me but this is really helping me to see things in a different light and a different perspective and I definitely think having some mentors to guide me further in my journey will be a really big help in building my self confidence levels to have the confidence in learning how to stand up for myself against the negative things people say about me and thanks for sharing about role models I've never really had any role models growing up so I think having people who can inspire me will be hugely beneficial as well

Hi @Braveheart,

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It sounds like you haven't been in a very nourishing environments and this is always so sad to hear regarding neurodiverse people. I sometimes think we put up hurdles in society that are not reasonable to expect neurodiverse people to jump for. I'm not sure where in the world you're based (you don't have to tell me of course), but in Sweden there are a lot of resources for people with neurodiversities - especially in further education. I was always used to lecturers using microphones and classmates being paid to take notes and send them to the welfare lead - who would then send notes to anyone who might be struggling to take their own notes - ie ADHD/autism/dyslexia/hearing difficulties etc. No one in the class knew who the class notes went out to, because it is considered discriminatory if someone has to declare to everyone in class that they are neurodiverse. They only have to tell the welfare people. My dad couldn't believe these resources were available! I think they should be all over the world to ensure everyone gets through school with the same chances.

My best friend with ADHD is the one reason we managed to send in our dissertation. She was incredibly organised - because she's always had to be. So we made clear guidelines and goals along the way and I think she was the one who really taught me how to study. 

[Braveheart]

thanks for sharing your story with me Duckie I'm based in Adelaide the environment I'm in has never really been nourishing and feeling like the odd one out in school and feeling like your constantly somewhat separate from your classmates because no one else is like you has always been a really big struggle for me as I've always felt socially isolated because I had no one else who could really relate to me or understand me at all and I've never really been accepted by the peer groups around me which has always made things so much more of a struggle because I've never been able to form friendships with my normal classmates without the fear of feeling like I'll always be seen as an outcast by those around me I don't know if you've ever been able to relate to that at all and growing up being the only one among family to be diagnosed with autism has made things so hard as well as I've constantly grown up with a lot of struggles around identity and never really knowing whether I'll ever be accepted for who I am and that's something that's been really hard for me to grapple with when still trying to figure out who I really am

Edited November 17, 2023 by Braveheart

[Emberfrost12]

On 11/16/2023 at 3:34 AM, Duckie said:

I imagine this can be quite tricky to nagivate at times. My best friend says similar things. She's basically always been taught to take a few seconds to breathe and to not jump from thought to reaction, and to "not start things" unnecessarily. But this sometimes means that the people who actually go too far aren't told off until she is absolutely fuming. But she rarely feels confident enough to trust her feelings. She tends to take it out on herself instead unfortunately. Horrible in a way that she's been taught she's not entitled to her feelings - I think it may be something a lot of people with ADHD might have been taught at some point. I still want her to stand up for herself, but she just feels like she can't unless it gets really personal and there are no doubts she is being insulted.

Everyone tells me to take a second but I never do. And I do the same thing; I'm passive one second and yelling at my school principal the next. I definitely was also taught that, and really strongly that being angry is wrong, so....I don't do anger anymore. I get really sarcastic when someone is aggravating though, and it tends to get almost comedic (even for me). I also have the thing of 'I can't say anything until it's very clear that I'm not completely misinterpreting this'

[Emberfrost12]

5 hours ago, Braveheart said:

Hi I'm new to Ditch the Label but this is really really helpful I'm autistic but have received a lot of negative things said towards me because of differences over the years and have recently been enduring the pain of being bullied because of being different but thank you for sharing that being Neurodivergent isn't necessarily something that should be viewed as being negative

Hey @Braveheart! 

I'm so sorry that people have been bullying you, I know how tough that is. 

It can be hard to be confident when you're told that something you experience is something that needs hiding. Lots of people assume that different equals bad, and that isn't true. Learning how to stand up for yourself is definitely important, and while I'm not going to be any help with that, I'm sure our mentors here can help you with that.

I can relate to being an outcast in peer groups. I've been lucky enough to find some really good friends, but I don't have them in all of my classes, and I definitely tend to be the odd one out. It really does suck, and I'm hoping that you can maybe find someone who is willing to give you a chance and be your friend :) 

[Emberfrost12]

5 hours ago, Duckie said:

Hi @Braveheart,

I was always used to lecturers using microphones and classmates being paid to take notes and send them to the welfare lead - who would then send notes to anyone who might be struggling to take their own notes - ie ADHD/autism/dyslexia/hearing difficulties etc. No one in the class knew who the class notes went out to, because it is considered discriminatory if someone has to declare to everyone in class that they are neurodiverse. They only have to tell the welfare people. My dad couldn't believe these resources were available! I think they should be all over the world to ensure everyone gets through school with the same chances.

My best friend with ADHD is the one reason we managed to send in our dissertation. She was incredibly organised - because she's always had to be. So we made clear guidelines and goals along the way and I think she was the one who really taught me how to study. 

That's a thing?? I guess one of the things that's offered is for students to have the slideshows and speaker notes available to them, which is pretty similar.

I am one of those people who doesn't study...maybe I should work on that one....

[Braveheart]

Hi @Emberfrost12

 

yeah I can relate to your best friend when I'm being insulted or bullied I sometimes tend to take things out on myself rather than talking things out in a healthy way and can really relate to feeling like you can't stand up for yourself unless things get really personal I've always struggled with finding friends and when you've been had a bully harassing you and telling you your a nothing that becomes so much harder to not want to hide who you are and becomes so much harder to stay true to yourself when faced with the kind of insults I've been enduring but I'm really glad I found a community here who aren't afraid to stand proud for who they are and it's a real inspiration for me

[Luie]

On 11/14/2023 at 7:12 PM, Emberfrost12 said:

A few days ago, I opened a survey (If you haven't taken it, it's right here https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/blogs/entry/462-another-survey-to-please-take/) to see where we could use some new content. The most obvious thing I found is that neurodivergency is not a thing all of us are confident in our knowledge of. So, I'm going to write a post about it and see if I can make this less of a post that should've been a blog, and more a post where where we can actually have a discussion. (And now I'm going to put headphones on so I don't have to listen to the guy next to me watching a video or tv show with someone gambling. Or is he gambling himself?).

So, what is neurodivergency? The roundabout definition that someone could give you is that 'neurodivergency is when you aren't neurotypical.' Great, that's a super unhelpful definition. A more helpful one could be 'neurodivergency is when someone's thinking patterns differ from what's typical.' And now we're getting somewhere. Things like attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), and autism-spectrum disorder (ASD) are the most famous types of neurodivergency. A few others are obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, and Dyscalculia. Some of these are better recognized, and some have red spellcheck lines underneath them despite the fact that they are real (and spelled correctly). 

ADHD is definitely one of the better known ones. Adhd has three main factors- inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity. You can have adhd with mostly inattentive patterns (ADHD-I), and you can have adhd that is primarily hyperactive (ADHD-H).  You can also have adhd with all three. The main negative impacts of adhd is that it can be hard to focus, it can feel wrong or unnatural to be still or in one place for too long, and it can make it harder to think things through before doing those things. ADHD is the kind of thing that you have for your whole life- it generally shows up when you're quite young and it isn't something that can be 'cured'

Autism-spectrum disorder is the all-encompassing term for autism. More specific terms are largely out of use, as they can be hurtful to some people. Some terms like 'asperger's' are out of use due to unpleasant origins (that one specifically originates from Nazi Germany), and should generally only be used if someone else says it in relation to themself first. Autism is a developmental disorder that also cannot be 'cured'

A few things you can do to help neurodivergent people in your life is to give them clear instructions when you need them to do something (don't assume that they automatically know how you like something done. Also, 'clear' does not mean 'like you're talking to a child'). Entertain the interests and fixations that come with autism and adhd, and do your best to not disrupt any routines or habits. 

To be absolutely clear, neurodivergency is not a necessarily negative thing. It can have some negative parts, but it can make some things easier, and it by no means makes anyone lesser. There are actually quite a few notable people in history who definitely were neurodivergent. Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, and Jim Carrey are a few examples of neurodivergent people who definitely weren't lesser for their neurodivergency. I repeat, neurodivergency is not a negative thing. I myself am neurodivergent, and I am not suffering for it. 

Hope this is helpful for someone :)

-Em =)

Extremely useful, thank you for sharing this and helping expand my knowledge on the topic too @Emberfrost12, really appreciate it and you on this platform! 

[Braveheart]

Hi Luie thanks so much for this it really helps put things into a different perspective and helps me realise that I'm not lesser because I'm different despite what I've had people tell me and what I've grown up believing my entire life.

[catgal05]

Hugs @Braveheart

[Braveheart]

thanks catgal05 the support here helps a lot

[Luie]

22 hours ago, Braveheart said:

Hi Luie thanks so much for this it really helps put things into a different perspective and helps me realise that I'm not lesser because I'm different despite what I've had people tell me and what I've grown up believing my entire life.

[Braveheart]

[Duckie]

On 11/17/2023 at 3:55 PM, Emberfrost12 said:

Everyone tells me to take a second but I never do. And I do the same thing; I'm passive one second and yelling at my school principal the next. I definitely was also taught that, and really strongly that being angry is wrong, so....I don't do anger anymore. I get really sarcastic when someone is aggravating though, and it tends to get almost comedic (even for me). I also have the thing of 'I can't say anything until it's very clear that I'm not completely misinterpreting this'

Hi @Emberfrost12,

That sounds really confusing, because it means you are essentially taught to doubt your feelings at first. I mean I always think it's good advice (for anyone really), to take a breath and to not jump straight to reacting, but there are exceptions of course. I don't think it's bad to question what someone might be saying just to make sure you are interpreting right, like saying "what do you mean by that?" or "I'm not sure I'm following - could you elaborate". If the person really meant something bad, then unleash the rage by all means. That's what I think anyways, but I'm not always right of course. But like rather than completely supress feelings, take a moment to check that you have the right understanding of what's been said. I am saying this because I so wish my friend would feel confident enough to ask these questions and then she can react however she feels suitable. But she often ends up beating herself up over things afterwards. No wonder! She's been taught being angry isn't OK. I bet you that people that taught her this are allowed to get angry though!! 

[Braveheart]

Hi Duckie I can elaborate a little on this I agree it's great advice for (anyone) to take a breath instead of jumping straight to reacting and I agree there are exceptions in certain situations and being taught to doubt your feelings at first I think is something everyone may have been taught at some stage which can definitely get confusing when trying to figure out whether it's okay to trust your feelings and having the confidence to ask questions and then reacting however is best suitable and I think taking things out on ourselves is something I think a lot of people have gone through at some stage of their lives