Coyotea Posted October 2, 2023 Author Share Posted October 2, 2023 I still don’t have a thesis statement and it’s due tomorrow. I’m totally fucked. I hate this assignment. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 2, 2023 Author Share Posted October 2, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. You know, a few days ago I was listening to my brother play piano while I had breakfast, and the first thought I had, the first instinctive thought, it just came naturally was “He plays really well, if he keeps up the work like this he’ll be going places, too bad I won’t be around to see it.” MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 7 hours ago, Coyotea said: You know, a few days ago I was listening to my brother play piano while I had breakfast, and the first thought I had, the first instinctive thought, it just came naturally was “He plays really well, if he keeps up the work like this he’ll be going places, too bad I won’t be around to see it.” It is interesting that that is the first instinctive thought you had. Thinking about it some more though, would you like to be there to see how his skills develop and to see if he will be going places? What about your brother - do you think he would he like you to be there? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 7 hours ago, Coyotea said: I still don’t have a thesis statement and it’s due tomorrow. I’m totally fucked. I hate this assignment. Can I ask, what will happen if you don't have a thesis statement by tomorrow? I get the impression that you are stuck and that you don't know how to get started, Is that fair to say? Would it help if you broke the task down into small steps and try to focus on one step at a time? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 4 hours ago, Aurora said: It is interesting that that is the first instinctive thought you had. Thinking about it some more though, would you like to be there to see how his skills develop and to see if he will be going places? What about your brother - do you think he would he like you to be there? I don’t know, I don’t really think I’ll be around that long, and I don’t know if I’ll end up staying in contact with him. I don’t think he would care either way. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 4 hours ago, Aurora said: Can I ask, what will happen if you don't have a thesis statement by tomorrow? I get the impression that you are stuck and that you don't know how to get started, Is that fair to say? Would it help if you broke the task down into small steps and try to focus on one step at a time? My dad will get mad, yell, punish me (how I don’t know.) I’ve tried breaking it down into small steps, but that hasn’t helped at all! Whatever, it doesn’t matter now, I’ll be punished and yelled at and my mental health will drop further that it already has and there isn’t shit that can be done about it. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Duckie Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 6 hours ago, Coyotea said: I don’t know, I don’t really think I’ll be around that long, and I don’t know if I’ll end up staying in contact with him. I don’t think he would care either way. Hi @Coyotea, You may very well end up not staying in touch with your brother, or it will be something to re-discover later in life. Is your brother younger than you? I know he's not very mature but he might mature one day. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Duckie Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 6 hours ago, Coyotea said: My dad will get mad, yell, punish me (how I don’t know.) I’ve tried breaking it down into small steps, but that hasn’t helped at all! Whatever, it doesn’t matter now, I’ll be punished and yelled at and my mental health will drop further that it already has and there isn’t shit that can be done about it. I'm so sorry to hear that @Coyotea, It sounds like you didn't get a fair chance to finish this thesis statement. Are you OK? It sounds like your dad could have helped you with sorting an extension for you but is chosing anger instead and that must be so hard for you to know and live with. A chosen family can be a lot stronger than your family of origin and that's OK. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 1 hour ago, Duckie said: I'm so sorry to hear that @Coyotea, It sounds like you didn't get a fair chance to finish this thesis statement. Are you OK? It sounds like your dad could have helped you with sorting an extension for you but is chosing anger instead and that must be so hard for you to know and live with. A chosen family can be a lot stronger than your family of origin and that's OK. It’s fine. It was fine, thankfully he didn’t yell at me this time. I know. That’s part of the reason I don’t consider my parents as family. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 1 hour ago, Duckie said: Hi @Coyotea, You may very well end up not staying in touch with your brother, or it will be something to re-discover later in life. Is your brother younger than you? I know he's not very mature but he might mature one day. That’s assuming I actually end up making it to that age. No my brother is actually other older twin, he’s 2 minutes older. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Duckie Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 10 minutes ago, Coyotea said: That’s assuming I actually end up making it to that age. No my brother is actually other older twin, he’s 2 minutes older. What makes you think you won't? I know you are really struggling and that you are going through a lot, but you will make it out of their house. Can I just ask that you are safe right now? For some reason I imagined him being younger. I can sense that he is not on your level in many ways. He may simply not understand because it is simpler not to question anything that's happening to you. It can be a safety net of sorts that allows him to be happy-ish, but also in denial. Would you agree? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 9 minutes ago, Duckie said: What makes you think you won't? I know you are really struggling and that you are going through a lot, but you will make it out of their house. Can I just ask that you are safe right now? For some reason I imagined him being younger. I can sense that he is not on your level in many ways. He may simply not understand because it is simpler not to question anything that's happening to you. It can be a safety net of sorts that allows him to be happy-ish, but also in denial. Would you agree? A lot of things. Yes, I am safe. I don’t know what you’re trying to get at. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Duckie Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 4 minutes ago, Coyotea said: A lot of things. Yes, I am safe. I don’t know what you’re trying to get at. Have you ever made any plans for when you're done with school and a legal adult so you don't have to live with them anymore? Where would you like to see yourself? This is an assumption I am making and I would like you to tell me if I'm doing so wrongly. I am just getting the impression that your brother seems to be in less distressed at home than you are, but I could be completely wrong about this. I am basing this on that he was joking with you when he had ringworm and that he didn't seem to understand that this was distressing for you and I'm thinking there might be other stuff like that too. But again, that is an assumption I am having. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 5 minutes ago, Duckie said: Have you ever made any plans for when you're done with school and a legal adult so you don't have to live with them anymore? Where would you like to see yourself? This is an assumption I am making and I would like you to tell me if I'm doing so wrongly. I am just getting the impression that your brother seems to be in less distressed at home than you are, but I could be completely wrong about this. I am basing this on that he was joking with you when he had ringworm and that he didn't seem to understand that this was distressing for you and I'm thinking there might be other stuff like that too. But again, that is an assumption I am having. I don’t like to think much about the future. It distresses me. I don’t think he is as distressed as I am, but honestly I don’t know, he could be but he calls couldn’t, I’m not him so I can’t tell you. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Duckie Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 3 minutes ago, Coyotea said: I don’t like to think much about the future. It distresses me. I don’t think he is as distressed as I am, but honestly I don’t know, he could be but he calls couldn’t, I’m not him so I can’t tell you. Sorry. I really don't want to cause you distress, so I will refrain from asking this question. Thank you for letting me know. Yeah, it might be something you will connect over some day. Or not. I'm happy your dad didn't yell at you regarding the statement. You don't deserve to be yelled at. Can you reach out instead of your dad and ask for an extension? Would that be possible at all you think? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 2 minutes ago, Duckie said: Sorry. I really don't want to cause you distress, so I will refrain from asking this question. Thank you for letting me know. Yeah, it might be something you will connect over some day. Or not. I'm happy your dad didn't yell at you regarding the statement. You don't deserve to be yelled at. Can you reach out instead of your dad and ask for an extension? Would that be possible at all you think? My dad doesn’t do extensions MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Duckie Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. Just now, Coyotea said: My dad doesn’t do extensions Sorry, I'm not sure what that means. Does your dad have to approve of an extension? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 3, 2023 Author Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. Just now, Duckie said: Sorry, I'm not sure what that means. Does your dad have to approve of an extension? It means my dad doesn’t allow us to have more time, even if we ask. He sets a certain amount of time and we’re expected to be ready by then. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Duckie Posted October 3, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted October 3, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Mental Illness, Suicide Click this notice to reveal the content. 4 minutes ago, Coyotea said: It means my dad doesn’t allow us to have more time, even if we ask. He sets a certain amount of time and we’re expected to be ready by then. Thank you for explaining this to me. Do you think he is mostly reasonable or unreasonable when he does this? I know this was a particularly difficult task, but what do you think about the time limit otherwise? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 4, 2023 Author Share Posted October 4, 2023 (edited) This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. Why the fuck is it so hard for people to talk about menstruation and not be transphobic?! Like- Every single time (even with queer people) I see people talking about periods they go group transmen, transmascs, non-binary people and literally anyone who is Afab and not a woman and gets a period into “woman/women” that’s not okay!!! Like- genuinely! Is it THAT hard to just say “people who menstruate” or change the language so that I and many others aren’t being, misgendered and invalidated?! Edited October 4, 2023 by Coyotea MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catsup Posted October 4, 2023 Share Posted October 4, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 9 hours ago, Coyotea said: Why the fuck is it so hard for people to talk about menstruation and not be transphobic?! Like- Every single time (even with queer people) I see people talking about periods they go group transmen, transmascs, non-binary people and literally anyone who is Afab and not a woman and gets a period into “woman/women” that’s not okay!!! Like- genuinely! Is it THAT hard to just say “people who menstruate” or change the language so that I and many others aren’t being, misgendered and invalidated?! I agree, and I'm sorry that you have had so many invalidating experiences. Sometimes even people with good intentions label menstruation as a "female" thing, and it must be really frustrating for you. I really do hope to see that language change in our society, and in the meantime, I hope you can continue to advocate for yourself and educate the people who care about you, if you feel up for it. And if someone doesn't understand or want to understand, that doesn't change who you are. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 4, 2023 Author Share Posted October 4, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 4 minutes ago, Catsup said: I agree, and I'm sorry that you have had so many invalidating experiences. Sometimes even people with good intentions label menstruation as a "female" thing, and it must be really frustrating for you. I really do hope to see that language change in our society, and in the meantime, I hope you can continue to advocate for yourself and educate the people who care about you, if you feel up for it. And if someone doesn't understand or want to understand, that doesn't change who you are. Honestly at this point I think I’m done trying to voice my opinions and “advocate for myself” I get called a jerk for it and no one ever listens. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catsup Posted October 4, 2023 Share Posted October 4, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 2 minutes ago, Coyotea said: Honestly at this point I think I’m done trying to voice my opinions and “advocate for myself” I get called a jerk for it and no one ever listens. That has to be exhausting and I understand why you would want to stop speaking up for yourself in this case. Do you have any other safe spaces where you can vent about this stuff? It sounds to me like it could help to have outlets. This forum and CS are places to vent too, but I wonder if you get any other opportunities to express your feelings, even if you just journal sometimes. In your life, where do you think you have these chances? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coyotea Posted October 4, 2023 Author Share Posted October 4, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 10 minutes ago, Catsup said: That has to be exhausting and I understand why you would want to stop speaking up for yourself in this case. Do you have any other safe spaces where you can vent about this stuff? It sounds to me like it could help to have outlets. This forum and CS are places to vent too, but I wonder if you get any other opportunities to express your feelings, even if you just journal sometimes. In your life, where do you think you have these chances? Just this journal here, my irl journal, and my little brother (chosen family) even so I don’t want to try anymore. However I will be posting some of my vent writing. Is that okay? I’ll try to put trigger warnings/content warnings on it but they do get rather…dark and kind of gruesome. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catsup Posted October 4, 2023 Share Posted October 4, 2023 This post has been flagged with warnings, as follows: Heavy emotion Click this notice to reveal the content. 1 minute ago, Coyotea said: Just this journal here, my irl journal, and my little brother (chosen family) even so I don’t want to try anymore. However I will be posting some of my vent writing. Is that okay? I’ll try to put trigger warnings/content warnings on it but they do get rather…dark and kind of gruesome. You can share your vents, but I would recommend doing it on Confidential Support, if that works for you? (Otherwise we might be moderating it here, and it could result in us hiding some posts). I'm glad you feel comfortable to share here. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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