help

[huskey]

So, my mental health declined again. I and my mom were getting back into a normal relationship, but now she keeps yelling at me and I don't know why. I have been trying so hard to get her to not yell at me, but she thinks everything is my fault. Don't get me wrong, I love her so much, I really do, just sometimes I don't like her. Is that bad? I feel like such a shitty person for even thinking that. I am now thinking again about whether or not my life is worth it. It is so much for me to handle. I stopped crying for about two months. Now, I am crying almost every night. Again. I thought I was finally getting out of that dark hole I was trapped in for so long. The only thing that seems to help get that out of my head is watching The Flash. Is that weird? I don't know why but watching that show makes me laugh. I feel like that's weird. Anyway, my best friend just went through a break-up, and now his ex-girlfriend likes one of his other friends. That hurts to watch. He is such a good friend of mine and it hurts me to see him hurt. I feel like everything has just been spirling down for me and him recently. 

[Catsup]

Hi, I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with your mental health.  I do want you to know how you feel towards your mom is totally okay.  You are going through a lot with her and I think that any negative thoughts and feelings are just that, and nothing more and you still do love her.  I can tell you really care about people including your friends when they're struggling.  I will be logging off soon, but I'm wondering, what are some other positive things about you that keep you going?

And how are you doing with wondering if your life is worth it or not?  I'm also going to list some crisis resources as well here to have on hand:

- (UK) The Samaritans - 116 123 (This is a free service that operates 24/7)
- (USA) Suicide and Crisis Lifeline - 988  (This is a free service that operates 24/7. You can call or text) 
- A list of worldwide crisis lines can be found here: https://www.befrienders.org   
- There’s an app I can recommend called https://prevent-suicide.org.uk/find-help-now/stay-alive-app/ - it has safety plans to make sure you don’t harm yourself and you might find it helpful.
- You can also call the police if you feel at risk.