Equivalent Ways Posted March 9, 2023 Share Posted March 9, 2023 So idk what to do, i just really dont care what this person is saying and i feel like i should but i dont. They dont ask me enough about me and I have trauma about being pushed aside. Any advice? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted March 9, 2023 Share Posted March 9, 2023 13 hours ago, Equivalent Ways said: So idk what to do, i just really dont care what this person is saying and i feel like i should but i dont. They dont ask me enough about me and I have trauma about being pushed aside. Any advice? Hey there, Thank you for coming to us for advice. I'm thinking it would be helpful for us to know a little bit more which will help us support you better. I'm wondering, who is this person and what is your relationship like with them? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted March 9, 2023 Author Share Posted March 9, 2023 4 hours ago, Monsoon said: Hey there, Thank you for coming to us for advice. I'm thinking it would be helpful for us to know a little bit more which will help us support you better. I'm wondering, who is this person and what is your relationship like with them? Well, I could go into specifics on whom the person sf, but i don't particularly feel comfortable doing that rn, not that I feel threatened, but i actually want to talk about it more generally revolving around all human relationships :3 Because for me it can/does feel universal you know? Like i feel like EVERYTHING i do is for my own sort of benefit and sometimes it make me feel like I was also trained to be a codependent by my father especially but others too.. and i needed to like not do anything but also be the perfect this and that at the same time?! it did not make sense and now it does-- that that is not how a healthy relationship should go, so thats what I mean when i say I am extra sensitive to that stuff. I can feel really chains and I am just working on feeling free. So back to what i was saying, for any relationship, how do I know if I am bein reciprocal with them but also not being just talked to over and over again? And how can I gain awareness of my own 'selfhinessnes'(sorry i dont have time to check spelling proper) while still helping others and not getting carried away? I do practice self care, and I love thinking about all this stuff, but I just am curious as to what others think cuz I am working through this stuff even right now! Thank you very much @Monsoon <3 MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted March 10, 2023 Share Posted March 10, 2023 Hey there, That's okay you don't feel comfortable sharing :) It makes sense about wanting to talk about the universal side of things. I'm wondering, with your question around being reciprocal, how would you describe a reciprocal relationship, and can you maybe give me some examples of what that might look like? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Equivalent Ways Posted March 10, 2023 Author Share Posted March 10, 2023 (edited) On 3/10/2023 at 10:03 AM, Monsoon said: Hey there, That's okay you don't feel comfortable sharing :) It makes sense about wanting to talk about the universal side of things. I'm wondering, with your question around being reciprocal, how would you describe a reciprocal relationship, and can you maybe give me some examples of what that might look like? good question :0 I'm not sure I have a such a clear answer for it though :/ Science is not my fav subject but I do like it sometimes, so in this context i will interchange 'reciprocal' and 'mutualistic' relationships, and that I can answer better :) imma post this then come back when i have more time and edit it to explain more! ok so now i dont feel like explaining as much anymore lol so here are the basics: My mom gives me food, shelter, clothes, water, etc.. And even though our relationship is a bit unique as in the parent should be caring for the kid however I give here, help with the yard/chickens, help with my younger siblings, help with groceries etc.. So we both get something good out of it and are satisfied with our relationship. Some ppl take take and take and I will just give that is no good >:( So i try to gauge based off how my energy level is and how I feel the both of us are contributing to each others wellbeing Edited March 11, 2023 by Equivalent Ways MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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