A few exerpts from a book I am writing with my partner

[ArtemisArt]

We have tentitivly titled it Journey of the Hellfire. These pieces are not in the order they take place, and I will have to ask before I post a whole chapter or anything, I just kinda wanted to see what others that we don't know personaly think.

@Rocco

 

Faressa looked at her reflection in the mirror, unsure of herself. Faressa had grown to be more than what she once was, true. But the concept that someone could be afraid of her, let alone Keres. Keres was the most feared, well-known pirate on the seas. She was fierce and unforgiving, even with all she’d been through in the last few months. Keres wasn’t just a pirate, either. She had untapped, powerful magic. Was it sentient, and scary as hell? Sure. But it was powerful, and it was there, even though she fought like she was death itself.  

Yet Faressa was too much for her. She had to go, didn’t she? As right as Margo was, she couldn’t stay. She would just drag them all behind, become more of a burden than she already was. At least, if she left with Flight, there would be things she could do before going back home. There was still so much waiting for her that she wasn’t sure she could face. 

 

 

 

“Darius, love,” Prisma said, “What is troubling you?” Darius spoke his voice low and sad. 

“They’re just… they’re just kids,” he whispered, “I mean… Flight is, what, seven? Faressa can’t be older than twenty, and Keres appears to be an older teenager. All together, they have gone through more trauma than everyone living in the average elven village combined. It’s wrong that they have to go through this. Flight should be playing with other children, learning how to read. Faressa should be figuring out how to take care of her gnomish village, and Keres should be enjoying the adventurous joy of youth with her freedom as a young pirate. None of them should be looking for missing parents, or trying to start a revolution, or having to deal with sentient magic that wants to kill, let alone destroy everyone and everything she cares about. At this young age they have been branded, burned, starved, captured, tortured, blackmailed, had to run for their lives, and nearly died, how many times? For what? Because Keres and Flight are part demon? Because Faressa was raised by gnomes?”

 

 

 

Keres awoke the next morning still feeling phantom pain in her leg.  She knew that if she were to take off her pants there would be a thick scar, and that if she pressed on it for long enough she would feel the phantom echos a bit more strongly.  But it was not her leg that bothered her, It was what came after, the loss of her eye, the removal of half of her field of vision, the creation of her blind spot. 

She sat up in the bed, and was greeted by cheerful morning hellos from the people who had invaded her life.  They were scattered around the room eating breakfast.

“Why did no one wake me?” Keres’s voice was still raspy from sleep.

Prisma looked her over before responding. “You had a rough night last night, and you had finally stopped muttering and thrashing. So we let you sleep, seeing as none of us have ever seen you sleep without muttering or thrashing.”

Flight was the next one to speak up. “Mom has a point, even when you were made to sleep, you would talk about… not so nice things.” 

Keres turned to look at Flight, he had been with her almost the whole time she was on bed rest. If she had not stopped muttering… By the chaos, what this poor kid now knew, his view of the world expanded only for much of it to still be about the suffering of others.  Keres looked away from Flight, his eyes told a story, a story of pain and suffering, a story of freedom and joy. This kid had never known freedom until just a few weeks ago, and his eyes showed pity. Pity for Keres. Pity for a pirate. 

 

 

[Luie]

2 hours ago, ArtemisArt said:

We have tentitivly titled it Journey of the Hellfire. These pieces are not in the order they take place, and I will have to ask before I post a whole chapter or anything, I just kinda wanted to see what others that we don't know personaly think.

@Rocco

Faressa looked at her reflection in the mirror, unsure of herself. Faressa had grown to be more than what she once was, true. But the concept that someone could be afraid of her, let alone Keres. Keres was the most feared, well-known pirate on the seas. She was fierce and unforgiving, even with all she’d been through in the last few months. Keres wasn’t just a pirate, either. She had untapped, powerful magic. Was it sentient, and scary as hell? Sure. But it was powerful, and it was there, even though she fought like she was death itself.  

Yet Faressa was too much for her. She had to go, didn’t she? As right as Margo was, she couldn’t stay. She would just drag them all behind, become more of a burden than she already was. At least, if she left with Flight, there would be things she could do before going back home. There was still so much waiting for her that she wasn’t sure she could face. 

“Darius, love,” Prisma said, “What is troubling you?” Darius spoke his voice low and sad. 

“They’re just… they’re just kids,” he whispered, “I mean… Flight is, what, seven? Faressa can’t be older than twenty, and Keres appears to be an older teenager. All together, they have gone through more trauma than everyone living in the average elven village combined. It’s wrong that they have to go through this. Flight should be playing with other children, learning how to read. Faressa should be figuring out how to take care of her gnomish village, and Keres should be enjoying the adventurous joy of youth with her freedom as a young pirate. None of them should be looking for missing parents, or trying to start a revolution, or having to deal with sentient magic that wants to kill, let alone destroy everyone and everything she cares about. At this young age they have been branded, burned, starved, captured, tortured, blackmailed, had to run for their lives, and nearly died, how many times? For what? Because Keres and Flight are part demon? Because Faressa was raised by gnomes?”

Keres awoke the next morning still feeling phantom pain in her leg.  She knew that if she were to take off her pants there would be a thick scar, and that if she pressed on it for long enough she would feel the phantom echos a bit more strongly.  But it was not her leg that bothered her, It was what came after, the loss of her eye, the removal of half of her field of vision, the creation of her blind spot. 

She sat up in the bed, and was greeted by cheerful morning hellos from the people who had invaded her life.  They were scattered around the room eating breakfast.

“Why did no one wake me?” Keres’s voice was still raspy from sleep.

Prisma looked her over before responding. “You had a rough night last night, and you had finally stopped muttering and thrashing. So we let you sleep, seeing as none of us have ever seen you sleep without muttering or thrashing.”

Flight was the next one to speak up. “Mom has a point, even when you were made to sleep, you would talk about… not so nice things.” 

Keres turned to look at Flight, he had been with her almost the whole time she was on bed rest. If she had not stopped muttering… By the chaos, what this poor kid now knew, his view of the world expanded only for much of it to still be about the suffering of others.  Keres looked away from Flight, his eyes told a story, a story of pain and suffering, a story of freedom and joy. This kid had never known freedom until just a few weeks ago, and his eyes showed pity. Pity for Keres. Pity for a pirate. 

Heyy @ArtemisArt, I find this narrative so interesting. I am wondering what inspired you to write about this? 

[ArtemisArt]

well, it started with just creating two D&D characters, and deciding that if we made our own world, we could write a deicent book about them. Most plot and characters one of us came up with on the spot, although we knew from the begining that Keres was going to be the kind of character you feel bad for, and that you were supposed to end up with kinda conflicting emotions about Faressa, but still end up pittying her. I guess as far as the rest of the insperation goes, we drew from some myths, some typical fantasy tropes, and things we find intresting in books.