idontwantutoknow Posted September 4, 2018 Share Posted September 4, 2018 hi.. im almost 21 and my mom still bullies me. about almost everything even bodyshaming:) like im 5'2 and she always call me u too short ppl around me has always told me im beautiful; but she always call me UGLY she makes me think about plastic surgery all the time:) she always tells me what a bad kid i am tho i can not remembering doing sth bad or break any rule:) and she always tells me that i can NOT be successful in my life. she is really making my world dark. i srsly do need help. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willow Posted September 4, 2018 Share Posted September 4, 2018 Hi IDontWantUToKnow, Welcome to Community! I moved this into our "Friends and Family" section so if people have a similar issue, they can find this thread. Thank you so much for sharing! I'm really sorry to hear that the bullying you recieve from your mom has not stopped, even though you're an adult. I want you to know-- the reason you're being bullied is not, and never will be, because of you. Here's an article on why people bully... This is your mom's issue. https://www.ditchthelabel.org/why-do-people-bully/ How often do you experience this bullying/ how often do you see/talk to your mom? Have you tried speaking to her about how much it hurts you when she says the things she does? Here's an article on conflict resolution. You don't have to put up with this just because she's your mom-- you're a human being who deserves respect, and an adult who can have a mature conversation about it. https://www.ditchthelabel.org/speak-anyone-anything-conflict-resolution/ And as for your success... that's up to you! You're already successful by reaching out to us and trying to step away from the conditioning from your mom. -willow MultiQuote Quote This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
idontwantutoknow Posted September 4, 2018 Author Share Posted September 4, 2018 i live with them in summer but rest of the year im far fro them... she is making me soooo hopeless about my future life like when i imagine her words i really get the power to kill myself. im sure she will be happy about it. she always tells me other kids are the way better than me tho im really going well in my major but she never see it. she even tells me boys doesnt want to date me but the truth is that boys ask me out alot but now i want to focus on myself but she always blame me on it. yes im an adult and it still hurts me to death to see i love her but she hates me this much. whenever i talk to her about it she starts again and tells me that i dont deserve the kindness she gives me....idk its like she doesnt even understand how much she break me MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ditch the Label Staff Harper Posted September 4, 2018 Ditch the Label Staff Share Posted September 4, 2018 Hi @idontwantutoknow! I will leave @Willow to respond in detail to your request, however I wanted to check in to see if you were okay. In your post, you mention suicide, which concerns me. Are you currently feeling suicidal? Please do take a look at the list of suicide lifelines we have put together here and do not hesitate to contact them if you are in crisis. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willow Posted September 4, 2018 Share Posted September 4, 2018 Hey IDontWantUToKnow, Wow, I'm so sorry you're not getting the love, acceptance, and support from your mom that you need. Is there anyone else in your life who supports you? I want you to take care of your wellness! - What kind of things do you do to reduce stress, both when you're at school and when you're at home? That's incredible that you're doing well in school! -- I know it's hard to remain positive when you're wanting your mom to be proud of you. It's not fair that she compares you to others, and doesn't seem how awesome you are! Nothing you do should be 'for' your mom. You need to find happiness in the things you do-- because, unfortunately, you can't force your mom to love you the way you need her to. You deserve health and happiness! -willow MultiQuote Quote This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jandy Posted January 19, 2019 Share Posted January 19, 2019 My parents used to abuse me emotionally and physically. After years I ran away and was placed in foster care and I was returned to my house with my parents. They stopped hitting me but they still say things that really hurt me and just being around them is really hard. I wish I had a different life but there's no way I can leave now because my parents are super protective now and there's no way I'll be able to leave again. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remi Posted January 22, 2019 Share Posted January 22, 2019 Hey Jandy, I’m sorry you to hear you’ve had a lot of pain occur in your life. It is clear you have lots of strength and resilience. Emotional and verbal abuse can be just as damaging physical abuse. Do you still have a social worker from when you were in foster care? If yes, I would report this to them - they will be able to talk to your parents about this and communicate how it is making you feel. If not a social worker then a mentor or teacher at school, a close family friend or just a trusted adult. How old are you now? You will not be at home forever - but you need to feel safe whilst you are there no matter what age. -Remi MultiQuote Quote This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remi Posted January 22, 2019 Share Posted January 22, 2019 (edited) Hey @banii I think you should give this a read too and see if anything feels familiar - this support guide advises what you can do in this situation. https://www.ditchthelabel.org/parent...ally-bully-me/ Edited January 22, 2019 by Remi MultiQuote Quote This Digital Mentor Account is no longer active. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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