Vent

[-Aussie-]

So this is a vent, this has a lot of triggers in it like Trama, Self-Harm, Su!c!de. 

As it is starting to get closer to Christmas and my B-day it is starting to make me think about everthing that has happend in my life with my "mom" and step mom and just everything. When i was born my Real mother left me so i didn't have a mom and i was adopted by my real dad and the reason i had to be adopted by him was casue he did not was not my parent so he had to go to court and everything just so i could go and live with him btw my mom left me on my birthday. after all that happen my dad met my step mom  and she is not the best she is really strict and now my dad is strict becasue of her and it just makes my life so hard and i and the youngest of 6 kids and it is so hard i am blamed for everthing. I have started have thoughs about ending and i have been self harming and it really hurts me but i don't know how to deal with it all and my parents make it worse they put so much pressue on me for something i don't want to do so i have been think why not just end it all I would be so happy but then i think of all the people at care and that makes me not want to do it so that why i think i am second hand su!c!del if you don't know what that is its where you aren't going to do it but you hope something or someone does it for you. 

[-Aussie-]

I have been self-harming for awhile and having though about ending it. I need help on what to do.

[Emberfrost12]

1 minute ago, -Maddie- said:

I have been self-harming for awhile and having though about ending it. I need help on what to do.

Call a helpline, a lot of them are listed on the following webpage

https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/377-if-youre-in-danger-or-feeling-suicidal-read-this/#comment-54388

Please know that we all appreciate you and I'm really hoping that you can keep yourself safe.

 

[Huxley]

Hey it's ok....

I personally don't go through this but I have other problems (don't we all) but maybe this will help..

Just tell yourself your fine, When i have strong feelings I express it through anger (maybe not the best option) but maybe when you feel like self-harming just breathe and tighten your fists because that makes me feel a little more in control, also it's good to keep around a candle to relax and breathe to. Ending it is the best option. You know I have a bunch of problems and I don't like to talk to people about it but I realized that when you talk about it then you can let it go, then again it's all based on the person you talk to and what there like.

 

Hope this helps... From Huxley

Edited December 14, 2022 by Huxley
Mistype

[Monsoon]

1 hour ago, -Maddie- said:

So this is a vent, this has a lot of triggers in it like Trama, Self-Harm, Su!c!de. 

As it is starting to get closer to Christmas and my B-day it is starting to make me think about everthing that has happend in my life with my "mom" and step mom and just everything. When i was born my Real mother left me so i didn't have a mom and i was adopted by my real dad and the reason i had to be adopted by him was casue he did not was not my parent so he had to go to court and everything just so i could go and live with him btw my mom left me on my birthday. after all that happen my dad met my step mom  and she is not the best she is really strict and now my dad is strict becasue of her and it just makes my life so hard and i and the youngest of 6 kids and it is so hard i am blamed for everthing. I have started have thoughs about ending and i have been self harming and it really hurts me but i don't know how to deal with it all and my parents make it worse they put so much pressue on me for something i don't want to do so i have been think why not just end it all I would be so happy but then i think of all the people at care and that makes me not want to do it so that why i think i am second hand su!c!del if you don't know what that is its where you aren't going to do it but you hope something or someone does it for you. 

Hey Maddie,

Thank you for sharing this with us. I get the sense that you're having a really tough time right now. It's really good that you're being open with us here, because the more we know, the more we can help you. This might be a hard question to answer, and we've only asked because we care about you, and we are wondering, do you have a plan to take your own life? It's okay if you have made one, and if you are feeling unsafe, here is some information to help if you are in crisis:

• You can call this helpline for support if you're feeling unsafe - USA - NSPL: 1-800-273-8255
• An app I can recommend: https://www.prevent-suicide.org.uk/find-help-now/stay-alive-app/ this has safety plans to make sure you don't harm yourself and you might find it useful. 
• Also, remember, you can call the emergency services or go to your A&E department if you're in crisis

We hope to hear back from you soon. Take care. 

 

[-Aussie-]

2 hours ago, Emberfrost12 said:

Call a helpline, a lot of them are listed on the following webpage

https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/topic/377-if-youre-in-danger-or-feeling-suicidal-read-this/#comment-54388

Please know that we all appreciate you and I'm really hoping that you can keep yourself safe.

i have though about talking to people about it but i don't think i will

 

1 hour ago, Monsoon said:

Hey Maddie,

Thank you for sharing this with us. I get the sense that you're having a really tough time right now. It's really good that you're being open with us here, because the more we know, the more we can help you. This might be a hard question to answer, and we've only asked because we care about you, and we are wondering, do you have a plan to take your own life? It's okay if you have made one, and if you are feeling unsafe, here is some information to help if you are in crisis:

• You can call this helpline for support if you're feeling unsafe - USA - NSPL: 1-800-273-8255
• An app I can recommend: https://www.prevent-suicide.org.uk/find-help-now/stay-alive-app/ this has safety plans to make sure you don't harm yourself and you might find it useful. 
• Also, remember, you can call the emergency services or go to your A&E department if you're in crisis

We hope to hear back from you soon. Take care. 

I have came up with a lot of different plans. I also write them down i don't know why But i have tried to a lot of time my first time trying was when i was 6 i am 12 now. 

[Monsoon]

Hey,

Thank you for being so open about your attempts to follow the plans. I'm wondering, are you thinking of trying to follow a plan soon? It's okay to tell us if you are, because if we know more about what's going on, this will help us to support you in the way you need. By the way, would you like to fill out this safety plan below? This will help to keep you grounded if you do get into another crisis, and many people find them really useful. Here are the questions: 

• What I need to do to reduce the risk of me acting on the suicidal thoughts:
• What warning signs or triggers are there that make me feel more out of control?
• What have I done in the past that helped? What ways of coping do I have?
• What I will do to help calm and soothe myself:
• What I will tell myself (as alternatives to the dark thoughts):
• What would I say to a close friend who was feeling this way?
• What could others do that would help?
• Who can I call:
• A safe place I can go to:

Just as a finishing note, I know it might not seem like it now, but remember, there is light at the end of every tunnel, and you will get through this, You are strong and resilient. Stay safe and speak soon. 

 

[-Aussie-]

6 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Thank you for being so open about your attempts to follow the plans. I'm wondering, are you thinking of trying to follow a plan soon? It's okay to tell us if you are, because if we know more about what's going on, this will help us to support you in the way you need. By the way, would you like to fill out this safety plan below? This will help to keep you grounded if you do get into another crisis, and many people find them really useful. Here are the questions: 

• What I need to do to reduce the risk of me acting on the suicidal thoughts:
• What warning signs or triggers are there that make me feel more out of control?
• What have I done in the past that helped? What ways of coping do I have?
• What I will do to help calm and soothe myself:
• What I will tell myself (as alternatives to the dark thoughts):
• What would I say to a close friend who was feeling this way?
• What could others do that would help?
• Who can I call:
• A safe place I can go to:

Just as a finishing note, I know it might not seem like it now, but remember, there is light at the end of every tunnel, and you will get through this, You are strong and resilient. Stay safe and speak soon. 

Hi, I have look over the questions and i thinkt there are only a few of them i could answer right now. I have been thinking about following one of the plans and i kind of have started to follow it. 

[Blondie]

13 minutes ago, -Maddie- said:

Hi, I have look over the questions and i thinkt there are only a few of them i could answer right now. I have been thinking about following one of the plans and i kind of have started to follow it. 

Hi @-Maddie-, I'm Blondie, one of the support mentors here. Thank you for being so honest - this really helps us to help you. Can you clarify if you feel you are safe now? Also could you tell me a little more about how you've started to follow the plan.

[-Aussie-]

I really don't know if i feel safe right now i am at school and even at home i don't feel that safe. And with the plan its hard to explain.

[Blondie]

1 minute ago, -Maddie- said:

I really don't know if i feel safe right now i am at school and even at home i don't feel that safe. And with the plan its hard to explain.

Would you like to pick this up in Confidential Support? I'm wondering if this might be easier there. What do you think?

[-Aussie-]

Just now, Blondie said:

Would you like to pick this up in Confidential Support? I'm wondering if this might be easier there. What do you think?

i don't really care but that reason its hard to explian is casue it have to do with stuff that a lot of people think is fake.

[Blondie]

Just now, -Maddie- said:

i don't really care but that reason its hard to explian is casue it have to do with stuff that a lot of people think is fake.

I want to reassure you that we don't think that. We understand that you're struggling right now and we're here to support.

[-Aussie-]

i still don't know if i want to explain it but even though i have started it i can stop when ever i want 

[Blondie]

6 minutes ago, -Maddie- said:

i still don't know if i want to explain it but even though i have started it i can stop when ever i want 

Do you feel like now is one of those times that you can stop?

[-Aussie-]

Just now, Blondie said:

Do you feel like now is one of those times that you can stop?

i really don't think so but, it could change. I think there is still a few months left

[Blondie]

1 minute ago, -Maddie- said:

i really don't think so but, it could change. I think there is still a few months left

I know it can feel hard to explain these things as thoughts can be muddled when you're feeling so low. is there anything you can think of that would be enough to make a real change for you? For you not to follow a plan?

[-Aussie-]

the only thing i can think of the could stop me is a person that is everthing to me but i don't know when i will see him again. 

[Blondie]

3 minutes ago, -Maddie- said:

the only thing i can think of the could stop me is a person that is everthing to me but i don't know when i will see him again. 

Can you tell me a little about him - I'd love to know more.

[-Aussie-]

He has been with me ever since my mom left me but i can olny see him every now and then but he is really different from me its hard to explain. 

[Blondie]

2 minutes ago, -Maddie- said:

He has been with me ever since my mom left me but i can olny see him every now and then but he is really different from me its hard to explain. 

Is he a friend?

[-Aussie-]

11 hours ago, Blondie said:

Is he a friend?

kinda

[Monsoon]

Hey,

We have just sent you a message to check in. Take care and speak soon. 

[-Aussie-]

7 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

We have just sent you a message to check in. Take care and speak soon. 

i don't have any messages from anyone

[Monsoon]

Hey,

It's on confidential support at the top of the page :)