Am I a bad person?

[Jolly giant]

So, I have a crush on my best friend who is bi and has a girlfriend but my feelings for him are so immense that it makes me anxious when I'm around him and I'm also socialy awkward when I hang out with him.

But the reason why I feel bad is because there is a voice in my head that always pipes up when I'm with him that says "He should just leave his girlfriend and date me instead" and I just don't know what to do.

[Monsoon]

Hey Jolly Giant,

Thank you for reaching out to us about this. It sounds like you're at a bit of a stopping point and wondering where to go next. I'm wondering, what do you want to get out of the situation? How would it go if you did tell him?

[Jolly giant]

2 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey Jolly Giant,

Thank you for reaching out to us about this. It sounds like you're at a bit of a stopping point and wondering where to go next. I'm wondering, what do you want to get out of the situation? How would it go if you did tell him?

I don't know how it would go but im scared that if I tell him he will hate me

[-Aussie-]

I can understand how you are feeling cause i am in the same problem. 

Edited November 9, 2022 by _mysticalMajesty_

[Monsoon]

17 hours ago, Jolly giant said:

I don't know how it would go but im scared that if I tell him he will hate me

Hey there,

I'm wondering, what makes you think he might hate you if you tell him? Where does that fear come from? 

[Jolly giant]

6 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I'm wondering, what makes you think he might hate you if you tell him? Where does that fear come from? 

I have no idea where the fear comes from but it has always been there.

[Monsoon]

On 11/10/2022 at 10:08 PM, Jolly giant said:

I have no idea where the fear comes from but it has always been there.

Hey,

Could it be that the fear is just your negative thoughts getting in the way a little? 

[Jolly giant]

On 11/14/2022 at 10:43 AM, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Could it be that the fear is just your negative thoughts getting in the way a little? 

I think so but I'm not too sure

[Monsoon]

2 hours ago, Jolly giant said:

I think so but I'm not too sure

Hey,

I think it might be after reading what you've told me. I'm wondering, how do you think he feels about you? 

[Jolly giant]

I think he feels like I'm just a friend who he can jokingly flirt with

[Monsoon]

19 hours ago, Jolly giant said:

I think he feels like I'm just a friend who he can jokingly flirt with

Hey there,

How does it make you feel to think that perspective might be his reality?

[Jolly giant]

35 minutes ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

How does it make you feel to think that perspective might be his reality?

I'm not really sure

[Monsoon]

23 hours ago, Jolly giant said:

I'm not really sure

Hey there,

I guess it's hard to know, but my point is that we can easily try to read someone's mind and become quite sure they are thinking in a certain way, but we can't really do that. What do you think? What are you going to do next, or have you not decided yet?

[Jolly giant]

2 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I guess it's hard to know, but my point is that we can easily try to read someone's mind and become quite sure they are thinking in a certain way, but we can't really do that. What do you think? What are you going to do next, or have you not decided yet?

I haven't decided yet

[Monsoon]

22 hours ago, Jolly giant said:

I haven't decided yet

Hey there,

That's okay, and it's good to take your time and think about what you really want from this, and the impact it might have on your relationship if you did decide to tell him how you feel. What do you think?