Love Crisis/Questioning

[Riri]

So… I am 18 and I never questioned my speciality before, until I kissed my girl friend when we were drunk a couple of times. I always supported LGBTQ+ so, but I always considered myself straight. After I kissed her, I got over this feeling pretty quickly, NOT UNTIL September. I met a girl (we are both from the same college), we are smokers so we often saw each other in different smoking places near our college, she is a masculine lesbian. I instantly knew I liked her the moment I put eyes on her, later I found out she actually didn’t notice me. Anyway I had the courage and followed her and send her a message, we talked a bit and finally I asked her out. We went out the next day, it was great, at first is was awkward cuz we are both introverts, but we talked a lot and got to know each other. Then she made a move and kissed me like 2-3 times. She seemed really interested in me and then jokingly I guess we said that we are dating and stuff…. The next day it was super awkward, we talked a bit but mostly we just kinda ignored each other. The whole week we just did a bit of chit-chat and that’s all. After a week we started to talk a bit more , she showed me her affection towards me by hugging me and stopping me in the hall so she can ask how am I,etc…. But I was always confused “what are we?” so I asked her, and she said we are “acquaintances” like whaaaattttt… Finally we were chatting like a week ago and I made a joke to her(keep in mind I am from Eastern Europe so this joke it’s ok to tell if you are telling it to friends), nobody ever got upset cuz of this joke so I told it to her, she instantly unfollowed me and never responded to my message. The next day I see her and try tot talk to her about it and she ignores me, we both curse a lot so at the end I told her she was a bitch, because I was telling her name from afar and she told her friend she didn’t knew me. It was really upsetting. It’s been more than a week and we still don’t talk, but every time when we seen each other I can’t stop looking at her, so is she….

I don’t care if I’m straight or bisexual, I just wanna be with her. But I don’t know what to do, because I don’t think I am in the wrong here, she could have just told me she didn’t like the joke and I would apologize and move on but she didn’t 

WHAT TO DO WITH HER????

 

 

[_Kai_]

 

14 minutes ago, Riri said:

So… I am 18 and I never questioned my speciality before, until I kissed my girl friend when we were drunk a couple of times. I always supported LGBTQ+ so, but I always considered myself straight. After I kissed her, I got over this feeling pretty quickly, NOT UNTIL September. I met a girl (we are both from the same college), we are smokers so we often saw each other in different smoking places near our college, she is a masculine lesbian. I instantly knew I liked her the moment I put eyes on her, later I found out she actually didn’t notice me. Anyway I had the courage and followed her and send her a message, we talked a bit and finally I asked her out. We went out the next day, it was great, at first is was awkward cuz we are both introverts, but we talked a lot and got to know each other. Then she made a move and kissed me like 2-3 times. She seemed really interested in me and then jokingly I guess we said that we are dating and stuff…. The next day it was super awkward, we talked a bit but mostly we just kinda ignored each other. The whole week we just did a bit of chit-chat and that’s all. After a week we started to talk a bit more , she showed me her affection towards me by hugging me and stopping me in the hall so she can ask how am I,etc…. But I was always confused “what are we?” so I asked her, and she said we are “acquaintances” like whaaaattttt… Finally we were chatting like a week ago and I made a joke to her(keep in mind I am from Eastern Europe so this joke it’s ok to tell if you are telling it to friends), nobody ever got upset cuz of this joke so I told it to her, she instantly unfollowed me and never responded to my message. The next day I see her and try tot talk to her about it and she ignores me, we both curse a lot so at the end I told her she was a bitch, because I was telling her name from afar and she told her friend she didn’t knew me. It was really upsetting. It’s been more than a week and we still don’t talk, but every time when we seen each other I can’t stop looking at her, so is she….

I don’t care if I’m straight or bisexual, I just wanna be with her. But I don’t know what to do, because I don’t think I am in the wrong here, she could have just told me she didn’t like the joke and I would apologize and move on but she didn’t 

WHAT TO DO WITH HER????

Elloooo, welcome to Dtl! I'll tag some mentors to discuss this with ya @Monsoon @Aurora @Harper @Blondie 

[Blondie]

23 hours ago, Riri said:

So… I am 18 and I never questioned my speciality before, until I kissed my girl friend when we were drunk a couple of times. I always supported LGBTQ+ so, but I always considered myself straight. After I kissed her, I got over this feeling pretty quickly, NOT UNTIL September. I met a girl (we are both from the same college), we are smokers so we often saw each other in different smoking places near our college, she is a masculine lesbian. I instantly knew I liked her the moment I put eyes on her, later I found out she actually didn’t notice me. Anyway I had the courage and followed her and send her a message, we talked a bit and finally I asked her out. We went out the next day, it was great, at first is was awkward cuz we are both introverts, but we talked a lot and got to know each other. Then she made a move and kissed me like 2-3 times. She seemed really interested in me and then jokingly I guess we said that we are dating and stuff…. The next day it was super awkward, we talked a bit but mostly we just kinda ignored each other. The whole week we just did a bit of chit-chat and that’s all. After a week we started to talk a bit more , she showed me her affection towards me by hugging me and stopping me in the hall so she can ask how am I,etc…. But I was always confused “what are we?” so I asked her, and she said we are “acquaintances” like whaaaattttt… Finally we were chatting like a week ago and I made a joke to her(keep in mind I am from Eastern Europe so this joke it’s ok to tell if you are telling it to friends), nobody ever got upset cuz of this joke so I told it to her, she instantly unfollowed me and never responded to my message. The next day I see her and try tot talk to her about it and she ignores me, we both curse a lot so at the end I told her she was a bitch, because I was telling her name from afar and she told her friend she didn’t knew me. It was really upsetting. It’s been more than a week and we still don’t talk, but every time when we seen each other I can’t stop looking at her, so is she….

I don’t care if I’m straight or bisexual, I just wanna be with her. But I don’t know what to do, because I don’t think I am in the wrong here, she could have just told me she didn’t like the joke and I would apologize and move on but she didn’t 

WHAT TO DO WITH HER????

Hey there, I'm Blondie one of the support mentors here - - welcome to community!

I would suggest asking her to meet up for a coffee or lunch and ask her kindly but directly how you've upset her with the joke. As you know, sometimes we can unintentionally upset people so it's good to clear the air. You will then have a chance to explain what you meant by the joke - but do be open to understanding her views too.

How does that sound?