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My insecurities [First Post here]


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I struggle a lot with the fact that I have hip dents, unfortunate fat deposits, and hair that while I'm told is pretty and thick, I wish it was fluffier naturally.

I know that I can't do much about my hip dents right now.

I have trouble with keeping my diet clean and keeping up a consistent exercise routine, I would like advice for this...I think I might do well with eating fruits...

Are there any tips to fluffy hair?

I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say here, so I'm sorry if this post is a little weird.

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey,

This post isn't weird at all. We all have our own insecurities about our bodies and it's really helpful to talk about that. Society can be challenging today for the way we feel about our bodies with so many unrealistic and inaccurate representations of body types in the media, and it's hard to not internalise those images and feel negative towards your own appearance; what do you think?Β 

I'm wondering, why do you think these negative thoughts about your body started?Β 

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Posted (edited)
21 hours ago, MimeNegative said:

I struggle a lot with the fact that I have hip dents, unfortunate fat deposits, and hair that while I'm told is pretty and thick, I wish it was fluffier naturally.

I know that I can't do much about my hip dents right now.

I have trouble with keeping my diet clean and keeping up a consistent exercise routine, I would like advice for this...I think I might do well with eating fruits...

Are there any tips to fluffy hair?

I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say here, so I'm sorry if this post is a little weird.

First, nothing is weird so don't think that. Second, we all have insecurities that we can't change which make us unique in our own ways. Hip dents and fat deposits are super natural and okay to have! I'm really good at giving advice for diets/eating habits so if you need that just reach out to me, whats your goal?- you don't need consistent exercise to maintain a nice physique, it does help but its mainly about your diet and what you consume. Trust me you, don't have to eat healthy, its about calories, you can eat a unhealthy meal of a small portion and still have a good physique, hope that wasn't too confusing. About the fluffy hair, sometimes I style my hair to be fluffy. If your hair isn't naturally fluffy, you should style it with a straightener, I mean that's what I usually do. If you need anymore advice on self appearance please let me know, once again hope that helped :)

Edited by mxhaxnaeem
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Thank you for the advice, I just have a problem with wanting unhealthy food and eating too much of it, while I'm not really obese, I want to stop having such a problem before I get really upset about it.

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2 minutes ago, MimeNegative said:

Thank you for the advice, I just have a problem with wanting unhealthy food and eating too much of it, while I'm not really obese, I want to stop having such a problem before I get really upset about it.

of course :) Just to let you know, you don't have to be obese to want unhealthy food LOL. I eat unhealthy too at times, we all do, its okay!! its because unhealthy food tastes good, I know right. Don't worry about it, just so I don't confuse things-what exactly is the problem? (sorry I comprehend stuff slow sometimes)

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That is alright! I have a problem with what I suppose is very nearly binge-eating, but while I have enough self-control to not eat too terribly much, I still don't do enough to burn off the calories.

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1 minute ago, MimeNegative said:

That is alright! I have a problem with what I suppose is very nearly binge-eating, but while I have enough self-control to not eat too terribly much, I still don't do enough to burn off the calories.

ohh, that make sense. Binge-eating sometimes may not be controllable and I don't blame you at all. About the burning calories part- do you enjoy any physical activities. Even taking walks and getting fresh air burns calories. There are many things that can burn more calories than you think-what is something you enjoy doing?

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Just now, MimeNegative said:

I love to dance [like a psychopath] and I'm trying out walking in a circuit for 2-3 hours a day to burn calories...but walking around isn't fun...

omg that's amazing! dancing burns so many calories and is fun and I dance like psychopath too your not alone XD. Walking is boring sometimes.Β but definitely keep up the dancing, that's great! How does that sound?

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It would be great if I wasn't nervous about posters watching me...beccause I'm paranoid...but I think I can do my best to get past that...or put away the posters while I'm dancing...I was considering just dancing for about 30-45 minutes a day -maybe longer-, but I think now I'm pretty set on that!

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Just now, MimeNegative said:

It would be great if I wasn't nervous about posters watching me...beccause I'm paranoid...but I think I can do my best to get past that...or put away the posters while I'm dancing...I was considering just dancing for about 30-45 minutes a day -maybe longer-, but I think now I'm pretty set on that!

That is a great plan I wish you luck! If you need anything don't hesitate, Im here. Oh yeah, I used to be paranoid about things looking at me too, my advice is put the posters away and dance your heart out !

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  • Digital Mentor
9 hours ago, MimeNegative said:

I started having problems with them when I noticed them and realized that's not how I want to look personally.

I'm wondering then, how would you like to look? What's the ideal appearance for you?Β 

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9 hours ago, MimeNegative said:

Uhhhhhhh I'm not sure how to describe it

That's okay. I think that we all have those hang ups about our appearance, but it can also be quite empowering to reflect on what we like about ourselves, so I'm wondering, what are some of the things you like about your personality and appearance?Β 

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I like most everything else about myself...skin imperfections, legs, arms, hands, face shape, eyes, lips, nose...

I'm not sure how to mark down my personality as I don't use it much with other people...I normally wear a sort of mask that acts protection for myself...I wouldn't say that I'm the best person, but I'm not the worst either...more of, I have my morals and people I care about, and I stick to them. I don't really have an opinion on my personality.

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4 hours ago, MimeNegative said:

I like most everything else about myself...skin imperfections, legs, arms, hands, face shape, eyes, lips, nose...

I'm not sure how to mark down my personality as I don't use it much with other people...I normally wear a sort of mask that acts protection for myself...I wouldn't say that I'm the best person, but I'm not the worst either...more of, I have my morals and people I care about, and I stick to them. I don't really have an opinion on my personality.

Hey,

It's really nice to hear what you like about yourself. With your personality, I'm wondering, what do you think those you're close to would say their favourite things are about your character?

I think that self-esteem is an interesting concept because we have a lot of power over how healthy our relationship is with ourselves. For the things we don't like, especially appearance wise, it might be that they can never change, or even if they can, it can be worth asking yourself whether you'd be truly happy if they did change, or would you find something new to direct negative attention to? What do you think?

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For my personality, I've been marked down as an INTJ, but some of the things they say don't resonate with me personally...I think that's the closest I can get to how to describe myself.

Β 

I also think that is very interesting! I think personally I would be happy with changing what I don't like, I don't think that there would be something elseΒ physically that I would be negative about...minds do change, but in this mindset, I think I would be fine if I stuck with my current mindset.

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  • Digital Mentor
20 hours ago, MimeNegative said:

For my personality, I've been marked down as an INTJ, but some of the things they say don't resonate with me personally...I think that's the closest I can get to how to describe myself.

I also think that is very interesting! I think personally I would be happy with changing what I don't like, I don't think that there would be something elseΒ physically that I would be negative about...minds do change, but in this mindset, I think I would be fine if I stuck with my current mindset.

I think that it's interesting to consider this point because from my experience of supporting people who have low self-esteem, when they are able to change something about their physicality, they often find themselves then focusing on something else that they'd like to change. Therefore, this shows that the person's perspective is the difficulty, not the appearance, do you know what I mean? I don't think that someone's appearance is ever a problem, but I think we have been conditioned to think that we need to change aspects of our appearance to be happier.Β 

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While that may be true, I'd still find myself more appealing if I changed what I could...instead of not wanting to look in the mirror when I'm nude...I actually had a panic attack about looking in the mirror while I'm nude once.

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