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What can I do if someone is using my chosen name as an insult?


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This guy in my beliefs and values class forced me out of the closet as trans and everything was fine in the first week but then the next week at the end of our geography class the guy told everyone about me being trans. I can't tell my parents about being bullied or my teachers because i'm not out to my parents and the teachers would probably say that they don't understand. Help!

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Being outed is tough. An ex-friend of mine outed me as bi, and I understand the stress and pressure of being in the closet, nevertheless being out when you're not ready! This dude who's using you're chosen name as an insult, ***********. ********, and you honestly don't deserve this AT ALL! You're chosen name is not to be used as an insult, and since you can't tell you're teachers or parents as of right now, I would suggest finding a teacher you know you can trust in keeping this secret and telling. Maybe a guidance counselor if you have one! They have to keep everything private between you and them, and can't share the information without you're permission, or if its something troubling that they need to tell someone (like suicidal idealization or self harm.) The only thing maybe against this is that they might call your parents, but if you tell them not to out you, they can just say it was bullying. Stay strong, and I hope this helped because I'm usually really bad at this!

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Hey LUCAS010804,


Thanks for coming to us for support. I imagine that what you are going through is very upsetting for you; how are you feeling? Please know that we are here to help you through this and that you are not alone.


No one should have to put up with being bullied, and it is not your fault. I see what you mean about not wanting to tell anyone that you are being bullied. However, if it continues, consider sharing it with someone - even a friend to start with.


My advice is that with you not feeling comfortable about telling parents and teachers that you are transgender, you could still report the bullying, but not respond to if it is true or not as that really isn't the point. The point is you were bullied and that is what needs to be dealt with. I do think it would be better to not have to deny what is being said, but I can imagine how scary it is for you to come out.


Here is a good help article to help those who are being bullied:




Also, here is another help guide to those who come out as trans:




I know that you aren't ready to come out to your family yet, but it has some great tips for when you decide to.


I hope this advice is helpful and I look forward to hearing back from you.


Hang in there! ?Monsoon


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