my child age 11 is being bullied by an autistic child and has been for 2 years,

[nickyf]

my daughter is in her last year at primary school. she has been bullied for 2 years by the same child. the child is autistic so the school say they cannot put sanctions in place for her bullying. my daughter now suffers with anxiety and bladder problems due to the stress (confirmed by a doctor) The school are not supportive and i'm not sure what to do anymore as i have been fighting this battle for nearly 2 years now. I am in the school / writing emails weekly regarding incidents that have happened. name calling, mean faces, shoving, manipulative behaviour, saying horrible things to my daughters friends about her, shouting at her the list goes on.

 

[Monsoon]

Hey NICKYF,

 

First of all, welcome to Community. Thanks for coming to us for some advice on your situation ? we are here to help you through this.

 

I am so sorry to hear what you have been going through ? it must be so frustrating that the school is not taking appropriate action. How are you feeling about all of this?

 

In regard to the child with autism who is bullying your child, do you know if they have tried to speaking to them about how their behaviour is unacceptable?

 

Having worked with pupils who have autism, I understand how they can often respond adversely to being punished, more so than individuals who do not have autism. Due to this, I can understand the school not wanting to put sanctions in place. However, even though a pupil with autism may struggle with being punished, it does not mean that bullying behaviours should be tolerated.

 

I am going to suggest something which may be useful if you have not done already: maybe you could ask the school to set up a meeting with you, your child, the child with autism, and their parents/guardians? This way, you would have a chance to air your concerns to those who look after the individual if the school have not done so already. There are many ways of redirecting problematic behaviour that can be present in people with autism, such as using Social Stories. I have attributed profound success to this method, and maybe this is something that you could suggest the school use with the child who has autism?

 

I know that you shouldn't have to be chasing up the school regularly, but it doesn't sound like they are being proactive enough, so I am glad that you are doing this. Also, do you know if the child will be attending the same secondary school as your daughter? If not, then at least it is good that this could be their final few months together in school. If they are going to be attending the same school, maybe it could be beneficial for you to request that they will be in different classes and give the new school a ?heads up? of what is happening?

 

If you haven't already seen it, this article gives advice on the route of reporting if you feel you want/need to take things further:

 

https://www.ditchthelabel.org/when-teachers-dont-act/

 

Let me know if any of this advice is useful to you. If not, we can work on taking a different approach to this problem. I look forward to your response and hope to speak to you soon.

 

Regards,

 

Monsoon.