Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 Ok so my trans-girlfriend who I wont say the name of for privacy had a go at me for trying to get her to do her maths in the lesson. Heres some context: Wed just been in German where some girls were arguing and she got annoyed and started swearing at them. About an hour later we went into maths and I took my seat and waited for her to sit beside me. She stood behind her chair and stood there for about 10 minutes of the lesson. She sat down afterwards and wouldn't do her work and started scribbling on her board and making remarks about a girl In our class who, I will admit, can be annoying but it still wasn't necessary. I kept telling her she had to do it, all the while being calm and reasonable. In the end I got frustrated and told her I gave up trying to change her mind. She then tried to make it seem as if *i* was at fault and I knew I wasnt. I told her to do at least one question. She went off on one in a steop and tried a higher question,got it wrong, and went all bitter and sarcastic towards me. On the way to lunch she was ignoring me and it hurt. Annoyed I turned her to face me and said that I wanted her to do well and that she wasnt being fair. She kicked off and threatened to end the relationship (I dont know if it's over or not it's hard to tell). I told her that she would have already done it with her actions and calmly told her that shed hurt me. That my feelings needed to be recognised and validated as much as hers in order to keep things OK and that wasnt happening. I told her if she did end things she was bringing it on herself either way because I had done nothing wrong to her and I didn't deserve to be treated that way. Now she won't talk to me and I don't know what to do. Ever since March when she came out as trans its felt like I don't matter as much as I did when things were different. Any and all advice is welcome. Thank you Me MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 @Aidan26 Here MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 Also She went off on one in a steop Strop* MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 9 minutes ago, Thisboiistrans said: Ok so my trans-girlfriend who I wont say the name of for privacy had a go at me for trying to get her to do her maths in the lesson. Heres some context: Wed just been in German where some girls were arguing and she got annoyed and started swearing at them. About an hour later we went into maths and I took my seat and waited for her to sit beside me. She stood behind her chair and stood there for about 10 minutes of the lesson. She sat down afterwards and wouldn't do her work and started scribbling on her board and making remarks about a girl In our class who, I will admit, can be annoying but it still wasn't necessary. I kept telling her she had to do it, all the while being calm and reasonable. In the end I got frustrated and told her I gave up trying to change her mind. She then tried to make it seem as if *i* was at fault and I knew I wasnt. I told her to do at least one question. She went off on one in a steop and tried a higher question,got it wrong, and went all bitter and sarcastic towards me. On the way to lunch she was ignoring me and it hurt. Annoyed I turned her to face me and said that I wanted her to do well and that she wasnt being fair. She kicked off and threatened to end the relationship (I dont know if it's over or not it's hard to tell). I told her that she would have already done it with her actions and calmly told her that shed hurt me. That my feelings needed to be recognised and validated as much as hers in order to keep things OK and that wasnt happening. I told her if she did end things she was bringing it on herself either way because I had done nothing wrong to her and I didn't deserve to be treated that way. Now she won't talk to me and I don't know what to do. Ever since March when she came out as trans its felt like I don't matter as much as I did when things were different. Any and all advice is welcome. Thank you Me Dang bro I'm so sorry about that. That's really unfair that she said those things to you; especially when it wasn't your fault. If you were in a good relationship, I wouldn't worry too much - just find time to try to talk it out with her, and see if you can save the relationship. If you want to of course. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 I don't think I can Aidan This isnt the first time MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 Theres been others but only petty ones. Not full blown arguments like this. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 Just now, Thisboiistrans said: I don't think I can Aidan This isnt the first time Really? If you have been fighting before, how did you solve it those times? Or didn't you? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 I mean it was just me forgiving her and letting it slide but this? This is far too much. Even for me MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 2 minutes ago, Thisboiistrans said: Theres been others but only petty ones. Not full blown arguments like this. So this is the worst one yet. . . But tell me: Do you want to save the relationship, or do you think you should let it go? Whatever is best for both of you. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 I'm just sick of being the peace keeper in the relationship MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 Just now, Aidan26 said: So this is the worst one yet. . . But tell me: Do you want to save the relationship, or do you think you should let it go? Whatever is best for both of you. I think I should end it but it's always me that does Every time we've broken up *I've* had to do it. And it's not even my fault. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 We've been together for ages but its hurting MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 1 minute ago, Thisboiistrans said: I mean it was just me forgiving her and letting it slide but this? This is far too much. Even for me Yeah. . . if the relationship is becoming toxic. . . maybe you should express to her about how you feel. If she isn't treating you well. . .that's not a good sign. 1 minute ago, Thisboiistrans said: I think I should end it but it's always me that does Every time we've broken up *I've* had to do it. And it's not even my fault. If you really do think so, then maybe you should?? If it's better for both of you. And even if it's not your fault, it is the right step to take, isn't it? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 I'm so sorry but my friends emailed me abt something urgent Gotta go bye bro thanks for your help I think I will end things with her but I'll let you know how it goes. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 Just now, Thisboiistrans said: I'm so sorry but my friends emailed me abt something urgent Gotta go bye bro thanks for your help I think I will end things with her but I'll let you know how it goes. ok cool keep me updated MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 Just now, Aidan26 said: Yeah. . . if the relationship is becoming toxic. . . maybe you should express to her about how you feel. If she isn't treating you well. . .that's not a good sign. If you really do think so, then maybe you should?? If it's better for both of you. And even if it's not your fault, it is the right step to take, isn't it? Yeah both these points are exactly what I'm thinking Its what's best I'm crying typing this but I'll be ok. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 Just now, Aidan26 said: ok cool keep me updated orr not cool but ykwim MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 See ya soon Aidan thanks Yeah both these points are exactly what I'm thinking Its what's best I'm crying typing this but I'll be ok MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 I sorta wish my other ex liked me again tbh. They treated me better than this and the only reason I split with them was because we were continuously bullied because were both biologically female MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 But still I accept that they don't and I respect that. Were good friends and I'm ok with that MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 5, 2022 Author Share Posted May 5, 2022 @Aidan26 u still there? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 43 minutes ago, Thisboiistrans said: See ya soon Aidan thanks Yeah both these points are exactly what I'm thinking Its what's best I'm crying typing this but I'll be ok Aww ur not ok *Hugs* 37 minutes ago, Thisboiistrans said: But still I accept that they don't and I respect that. Were good friends and I'm ok with that Yeah, as long as ur friends 38 minutes ago, Thisboiistrans said: I sorta wish my other ex liked me again tbh. They treated me better than this and the only reason I split with them was because we were continuously bullied because were both biologically female Ah that's too bad 34 minutes ago, Thisboiistrans said: @Aidan26 u still there? yeah hi sorry MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hazard Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 1 hour ago, Thisboiistrans said: Ok so my trans-girlfriend who I wont say the name of for privacy had a go at me for trying to get her to do her maths in the lesson. Heres some context: Wed just been in German where some girls were arguing and she got annoyed and started swearing at them. About an hour later we went into maths and I took my seat and waited for her to sit beside me. She stood behind her chair and stood there for about 10 minutes of the lesson. She sat down afterwards and wouldn't do her work and started scribbling on her board and making remarks about a girl In our class who, I will admit, can be annoying but it still wasn't necessary. I kept telling her she had to do it, all the while being calm and reasonable. In the end I got frustrated and told her I gave up trying to change her mind. She then tried to make it seem as if *i* was at fault and I knew I wasnt. I told her to do at least one question. She went off on one in a steop and tried a higher question,got it wrong, and went all bitter and sarcastic towards me. On the way to lunch she was ignoring me and it hurt. Annoyed I turned her to face me and said that I wanted her to do well and that she wasnt being fair. She kicked off and threatened to end the relationship (I dont know if it's over or not it's hard to tell). I told her that she would have already done it with her actions and calmly told her that shed hurt me. That my feelings needed to be recognised and validated as much as hers in order to keep things OK and that wasnt happening. I told her if she did end things she was bringing it on herself either way because I had done nothing wrong to her and I didn't deserve to be treated that way. Now she won't talk to me and I don't know what to do. Ever since March when she came out as trans its felt like I don't matter as much as I did when things were different. Any and all advice is welcome. Thank you Me Hey, I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this. She doesn't deserve you if she's going to be doing this. I really hope that things get better MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Lmnshrk- Posted May 5, 2022 Share Posted May 5, 2022 1 hour ago, Thisboiistrans said: Yeah both these points are exactly what I'm thinking Its what's best I'm crying typing this but I'll be ok. *Hugs brother* U gonna be okk eventually I here for u MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal_The_Oyster Posted May 6, 2022 Author Share Posted May 6, 2022 Hey! I broke up with her today Suprisingly though I'm not happy or sad abt it MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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