can't get over a guy I like that has a girlfriend

[tacofriyay]

So I just needed to vent since I really haven't been able to and also I feel so stupid still thinking about this. So this guy I met about 1,5 years ago had all the red flags of a fuckboy ( but he was hot af ) so my stupid logic was if we only slept with each other and nothing more it would be fine. But he kept telling me how he really liked me and we had so much fun together that I started to really like him. And after like 9 months of meeting him and sleeping with each other I found out he had a girlfriend all that time.  I stalked his insta and found his girlfriend's ig and I felt so bad and angry but I still kept sleeping with him ( cus that D was too good :( ) I was in denial and kept telling myself that maybe it really was his cousin that he said it was like tf so stupid. After a year of meeting him I moved back to my country and since then he sometimes still text me and I die everytime cause I just can't get over him. Like red flags is his middle name but I just know if I went back and he would reach out I would prob meet him.  And I know it doesn't matter but I really don't get it why he sometimes text me since I haven't texted him first since I left when he knows I moved and has a girlfriend and is still together with her. 

[Monsoon]

19 hours ago, tacofriyay said:

So I just needed to vent since I really haven't been able to and also I feel so stupid still thinking about this. So this guy I met about 1,5 years ago had all the red flags of a fuckboy ( but he was hot af ) so my stupid logic was if we only slept with each other and nothing more it would be fine. But he kept telling me how he really liked me and we had so much fun together that I started to really like him. And after like 9 months of meeting him and sleeping with each other I found out he had a girlfriend all that time.  I stalked his insta and found his girlfriend's ig and I felt so bad and angry but I still kept sleeping with him ( cus that D was too good :( ) I was in denial and kept telling myself that maybe it really was his cousin that he said it was like tf so stupid. After a year of meeting him I moved back to my country and since then he sometimes still text me and I die everytime cause I just can't get over him. Like red flags is his middle name but I just know if I went back and he would reach out I would prob meet him.  And I know it doesn't matter but I really don't get it why he sometimes text me since I haven't texted him first since I left when he knows I moved and has a girlfriend and is still together with her. 

Hey there,

I'm really sorry to hear about how things played out with this guy. It sounds like he is super untrustworthy. I noticed that you said how stupid you feel, and I'm wondering, can you tell me more about why that is? Also, it sounds like you haven't had closure from the thing you had going on. What do you think about that? 

[tacofriyay]

I just feel stupid for continuing to meet him even though I knew all the red flags and even more stupid for still thinking about him after such a long time and we are both in totally different countries to. And I totally agree that haven’t had closure and I really don’t know how to get the closure I need.

[Monsoon]

Hey,

I think it's completely normal to fee this way in your kind of situation, but the thing is, it's much easier said than done to just move on and get closure, so that's why it can be tricky and involve going back to them, even if you don't want to. I think that to get closure, it usually involves talking to the person about how you're feeling. What do you think about that?