my life’s kinda shitty

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

yeah sorry I just vanished for 2 months…life. Anyway, for those two months I disappeared from here, I got rejected by my crush and slapped in the face by her, questioning why I don’t feel like I’m white enough, and my dad is convinced me being non binary is a kink. Yay. I’m not sure if anyone care expect me…but that’s my update.

[Monsoon]

18 hours ago, RussianKai said:

yeah sorry I just vanished for 2 months…life. Anyway, for those two months I disappeared from here, I got rejected by my crush and slapped in the face by her, questioning why I don’t feel like I’m white enough, and my dad is convinced me being non binary is a kink. Yay. I’m not sure if anyone care expect me…but that’s my update.

Hey there,

I just want you to know that we care and we are here for you. It sounds like things have been building up and getting under your skin. How are you feeling about everything?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

2 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I just want you to know that we care and we are here for you. It sounds like things have been building up and getting under your skin. How are you feeling about everything?

not very good. every single day i see that girl again, and i’m the talk of my school because being actually gay and not for a prank is unheard at my school. the culture and race thing is weird tbh even though I’m white yet i don’t feel like i’m white. the dad thing just kinda spells itself out.

[Monsoon]

Hey there,

I'm wondering, which one would you like to talk about first? What is bothering you the most?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

10 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I'm wondering, which one would you like to talk about first? What is bothering you the most?

probably the rejection one since I have to deal with her every single day.

[Monsoon]

Sure. Can you tell me more about what happened with her?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

On 4/5/2022 at 9:26 AM, Monsoon said:

Sure. Can you tell me more about what happened with her?

lol sorry i haven’t responded these past few days i had state testing. so our school had this thing where for Valentine’s Day we could leave notes for people for a dollar. I made some jokey type ones with my friends and signed my name, but for some reason with her I decided to be discreet and change my handwriting and not sign my name. She got it and like her friends were desperately trying to figure out who wrote it. Somehow I made my handwriting look similar to a kid infamous in our school for being a chief dick, like the rudest person you have ever met. I overheard this conversation and then her friends suggested she try to ask him out. I was naive and didn’t want her to get hurt and honestly, maybe start dating him, so in the middle of the hallway where they’re talking about this, I randomly blurt out, “it was me, I left it.” Keep in mind half of my school in getting ready to leave since school is dismissed, and everybody stares at me. So I just run down the stairs at lightning speed and just hide from everyone until my mom can pick me since we live like 5 miles away from my school. I knew my fate the next day and tried to walk to school with no shame. I wasn’t good at hiding the fact I wanted to die of cringe, and spent home room hiding in the bathroom writing on my laptop. However, when I was leaving my spot in the bathroom, the girl walked in and I started to run out the door, but she grabbed my shoulder and dragged me back inside. 
 

I was super nervous and it was clear. She then called me a homophobic slur and slapped my face, and walked out of the bathroom. I remember just running back to my bathroom stall, and spent the next thirty minutes crying, no caring I was missing.

 

Finally some kid from my class found me and basically told me what was going on. The girl had been bragging she slapped me. She also told people she wouldn’t date me even if I was a man because I wasn’t Indian??? 
 

Anyway every day I go to school I live in shame and eat lunch with my friends in the art room. 

Edited April 8, 2022 by RussianKai

[Monsoon]

10 hours ago, RussianKai said:

lol sorry i haven’t responded these past few days i had state testing. so our school had this thing where for Valentine’s Day we could leave notes for people for a dollar. I made some jokey type ones with my friends and signed my name, but for some reason with her I decided to be discreet and change my handwriting and not sign my name. She got it and like her friends were desperately trying to figure out who wrote it. Somehow I made my handwriting look similar to a kid infamous in our school for being a chief dick, like the rudest person you have ever met. I overheard this conversation and then her friends suggested she try to ask him out. I was naive and didn’t want her to get hurt and honestly, maybe start dating him, so in the middle of the hallway where they’re talking about this, I randomly blurt out, “it was me, I left it.” Keep in mind half of my school in getting ready to leave since school is dismissed, and everybody stares at me. So I just run down the stairs at lightning speed and just hide from everyone until my mom can pick me since we live like 5 miles away from my school. I knew my fate the next day and tried to walk to school with no shame. I wasn’t good at hiding the fact I wanted to die of cringe, and spent home room hiding in the bathroom writing on my laptop. However, when I was leaving my spot in the bathroom, the girl walked in and I started to run out the door, but she grabbed my shoulder and dragged me back inside. 
 

I was super nervous and it was clear. She then called me a homophobic slur and slapped my face, and walked out of the bathroom. I remember just running back to my bathroom stall, and spent the next thirty minutes crying, no caring I was missing.

Finally some kid from my class found me and basically told me what was going on. The girl had been bragging she slapped me. She also told people she wouldn’t date me even if I was a man because I wasn’t Indian??? 
 

Anyway every day I go to school I live in shame and eat lunch with my friends in the art room. 

Hey there,

I'm sorry to hear that you were assaulted by this person; have you told any members of school staff about it? This is serious and it would be good to let them know if you haven't already so they can make sure it doesn't happen again. I noticed what you said about no caring that you were missing; can you tell me more about that?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

On 4/8/2022 at 5:18 AM, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

I'm sorry to hear that you were assaulted by this person; have you told any members of school staff about it? This is serious and it would be good to let them know if you haven't already so they can make sure it doesn't happen again. I noticed what you said about no caring that you were missing; can you tell me more about that?

I told to the school and they didn’t care since her family funds a lot of the school…so yeah. No one really cares I’m missing since I don’t really talk much in school.

[Monsoon]

12 hours ago, RussianKai said:

I told to the school and they didn’t care since her family funds a lot of the school…so yeah. No one really cares I’m missing since I don’t really talk much in school.

Hey there,

Can I ask, what did the school say when you told them? Who did you speak to? 

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

2 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

Can I ask, what did the school say when you told them? Who did you speak to? 

After this happened, I decided to go to our school principal. She basically said that they weren’t going to look into it since how much her dad funds the school.

[Monsoon]

Hey there,

That's interesting. Is that what she actually said? 

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

On 4/11/2022 at 4:53 AM, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

That's interesting. Is that what she actually said? 

Yeah, sadly.

[Monsoon]

9 hours ago, RussianKai said:

Yeah, sadly.

Hey there. I'm sorry to hear about this. How are you feeling? I can imagine you're hurt and feel like you can't trust your school which are both valid emotional reactions to this situation. You know, you can make a complaint about this to the school governors who will be able to look into this?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

On 4/13/2022 at 12:51 AM, Monsoon said:

Hey there. I'm sorry to hear about this. How are you feeling? I can imagine you're hurt and feel like you can't trust your school which are both valid emotional reactions to this situation. You know, you can make a complaint about this to the school governors who will be able to look into this?

Honestly, I’m really tired of everything that’s going on, because I’m not even a full grown adult, and I have all this problems on my shoulders. The girl’s dad is also on the school board and stuff, so even if I complain, nothing will probably happen.

[Monsoon]

4 hours ago, RussianKai said:

Honestly, I’m really tired of everything that’s going on, because I’m not even a full grown adult, and I have all this problems on my shoulders. The girl’s dad is also on the school board and stuff, so even if I complain, nothing will probably happen.

Hey there,

Yeah, I can see that this would be a lot to carry on your shoulders, and I just want you to know that we are here for you. You can always come here to vent. 

I'm wondering, if you could scream and shout something at the person who did this to you and the principal without getting into trouble, what would you say?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

1 hour ago, Monsoon said:

Hey there,

Yeah, I can see that this would be a lot to carry on your shoulders, and I just want you to know that we are here for you. You can always come here to vent. 

I'm wondering, if you could scream and shout something at the person who did this to you and the principal without getting into trouble, what would you say?

I don’t think I can put that on here without getting banned…haha

[Monsoon]

11 hours ago, RussianKai said:

I don’t think I can put that on here without getting banned…haha

Hey,

That's okay, just go for it! 

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

11 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

That's okay, just go for it! 

Honestly, probably a lot of swearing. 

[Monsoon]

Hey,

Fair enough. In that case then, you might find its helpful to go to a quiet place and scream out loud what you want to say; people can find it releases a lot of the anger and upset. What do you think?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

10 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Fair enough. In that case then, you might find its helpful to go to a quiet place and scream out loud what you want to say; people can find it releases a lot of the anger and upset. What do you think?

I don’t have the time or the place to do this lol.

[Monsoon]

Hey,

Fair enough! If you ever do find the time, it can be helpful to just write a letter which you pour your heart into, and then rip it up. Some people find it quite therapeutic and it can really help you move forward.

How are you feeling about everything else at the moment?

[heymomifoundthewifitsgay]

16 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Fair enough! If you ever do find the time, it can be helpful to just write a letter which you pour your heart into, and then rip it up. Some people find it quite therapeutic and it can really help you move forward.

How are you feeling about everything else at the moment?

I’m currently making another post to talk about more of this :)

[Monsoon]

15 hours ago, hellolife-am-i-okay said:

I’m currently making another post to talk about more of this :)

Hey,

I've just seen your other post, so I'll reply there. Speak soon.