I'm so tired of people!!

[FreakNamedKai]

Ima rant a little here ------

 

Someone at school was all like "BeInG gAy ShOuLd Be An IlNeSs" Then we had a short arguement on whether there was 2 or 78 genders?!?! Does anyone at your schol do this....

ALSO to the racists ----- All lives matter

[Monsoon]

Hey there,

That sounds like it must have been an intense discussion. How did it go? 

[BusinessBee]

It isn't just your school, people at my school do this all the time.

[Monsoon]

11 hours ago, BusinessBee said:

It isn't just your school, people at my school do this all the time.

Hey,

Sorry to hear this happens at your school too. How do the school manage this kind of behaviour? 

[BusinessBee]

2 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Sorry to hear this happens at your school too. How do the school manage this kind of behaviour? 

The school just ignores it.

[Monsoon]

43 minutes ago, BusinessBee said:

The school just ignores it.

Hey,

Ah, that sucks. What kind of things are people saying? 

[BusinessBee]

1 hour ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Ah, that sucks. What kind of things are people saying? 

They just make jokes about being trans or bi. For example, "You can't use the school bathroom since you arent one gender."

 

 

[Monsoon]

Hey,

Ah, that must be hurtful for people in the community to hear. How does it make you feel knowing that this goes on?

[BusinessBee]

@Monsoon it just makes me frustrated that people feel this is funny.

[Sara007]

This happens in my school as well...plus where im from..or the country that i live..is a pretry conservative one..so its like at least 50 of every 500 people(probably even more) are homophobic...its very sad actually...cause i have watched multiple documentaries and read people's experiences with how the people of my country have treated them...and just to be clear not all of the people are bad and homophobic and bullies...just a minority...but a country with over a billion people..thats alot of homophobic/bullies/bad people....and literally nobody even educates children abt sex...like its like they think talking about sex...or talking about different genders and sexualities are all like "very bad things in gods eye..and are like sins" .....

[BusinessBee]

@Sara007 Im sorry this is so common in your country 

[Monsoon]

13 hours ago, BusinessBee said:

@Monsoon it just makes me frustrated that people feel this is funny.

Hey,

Yeah, I totally get that. It's a shame that the school are ignoring it as well. What do you think the school could do to manage it in a better way? 

[Monsoon]

9 hours ago, Sara007 said:

This happens in my school as well...plus where im from..or the country that i live..is a pretry conservative one..so its like at least 50 of every 500 people(probably even more) are homophobic...its very sad actually...cause i have watched multiple documentaries and read people's experiences with how the people of my country have treated them...and just to be clear not all of the people are bad and homophobic and bullies...just a minority...but a country with over a billion people..thats alot of homophobic/bullies/bad people....and literally nobody even educates children abt sex...like its like they think talking about sex...or talking about different genders and sexualities are all like "very bad things in gods eye..and are like sins" .....

Hey Sara,

That sounds a really tricky environment to grow up in. How are you finding it? 

[Sara007]

Very suffocating and restricting and depressing cause you just simply cannot be open about things...plus in my country...in general..kids are not cumfortable talking about mental health with their parents..because istead of trying to understand what the kid is trying to say or try counselling the kid they just scold you and think that the child is talking "Rubbish"....so yeah there's alot wrong with me country...but i cant talk about all of this with the people of my country..espacially the older generations...and thats how i found myself becoming a part of this website....

[BusinessBee]

5 hours ago, Monsoon said:

Hey,

Yeah, I totally get that. It's a shame that the school are ignoring it as well. What do you think the school could do to manage it in a better way? 

I feel the school could scold those who do this and help them learn otherwise 

[Monsoon]

Hey there,

What could their help look like in terms of supporting them to learn otherwise? :) 

6 hours ago, Sara007 said:

Very suffocating and restricting and depressing cause you just simply cannot be open about things...plus in my country...in general..kids are not cumfortable talking about mental health with their parents..because istead of trying to understand what the kid is trying to say or try counselling the kid they just scold you and think that the child is talking "Rubbish"....so yeah there's alot wrong with me country...but i cant talk about all of this with the people of my country..espacially the older generations...and thats how i found myself becoming a part of this website....

Hey there,

Ah, yeah, it sounds like there are major issues in the society you live in, and I totally get why you find it suffocating. What are your experiences of opening up about your mental health like? 

[Sara007]

My personal experiences...well...none..cause people that i have talked with (like just general catching up and stuff) seem very adamant about the things they believe in..and most of their so called "morals"  include being homophobic..bullying people about their looks...and one of their fav. things to say when you really wanna open up about some thing that happened in school with you or just want to talk abt your mental health...they say "you should act your age and not talk like adults" .....like what does that even mean..like just because im young i cant be self aware or have some issues..or talk abt mental health..?!?!

[Monsoon]

Hey there,

Ah, that sounds really tricky. We all have a need for support, and it can be really upsetting and dismissive when people respond in those kinds of ways. However, I'm glad that you've found us because this is a safe space where you can talk about your mental health. How is your wellbeing at the moment? 

[Sara007]

my wellbeing...hmm..i mean i wouldnt say its the worst...cause i find ways to comfort myself...and even tho not for long at least im not always depressed...its just that there's so much that has happened during the past 2 years (covid yrs) that i just feel outrageously and overly overwhelmed sometimes...things regarding school...things regarding me trynna figure out my sexuality...and things regarding my family relations...and blah  blah blah...over all, all these topics are pretty harsh...and cannot be sorted out in one day...so sometimes it gets really triggering and i start getting depressed because of this...but like i said i have found ways to calm myself down and show myself some love and support...to get my mind off of this even if just for a few hrs...but still it helps...i know how to like....not get it out of control...so yeah...all in all my wellbeing is pretty messy but still manageable.....

[Monsoon]

10 hours ago, Sara007 said:

my wellbeing...hmm..i mean i wouldnt say its the worst...cause i find ways to comfort myself...and even tho not for long at least im not always depressed...its just that there's so much that has happened during the past 2 years (covid yrs) that i just feel outrageously and overly overwhelmed sometimes...things regarding school...things regarding me trynna figure out my sexuality...and things regarding my family relations...and blah  blah blah...over all, all these topics are pretty harsh...and cannot be sorted out in one day...so sometimes it gets really triggering and i start getting depressed because of this...but like i said i have found ways to calm myself down and show myself some love and support...to get my mind off of this even if just for a few hrs...but still it helps...i know how to like....not get it out of control...so yeah...all in all my wellbeing is pretty messy but still manageable.....

Hey there,

Although you do have your struggles with your wellbeing, I'm glad you are finding ways to manage it. I'm wondering, does anyone else in your life now about how you struggle? I'm just thinking that if you open up, you might be able to get more help for the depression you experience.

Also, would you like to speak about those things you mentioned, like school, sexuality, and your family? I always think that a problem shared is a problem halved, and opening up is an intervention in itself :) 

[Egg]

Yah, those people suck. They sadly are everywere.

[Sara007]

Nope...i havent opened up to people clearly..like a few like 2 or 3 know that im kind of depressed...but they dont know why im depressed...and i know opening up can help...and i have opened up to 1 of my friends a lil bit...but you know its not that easy...cause in the back of my mind theres this thought thats like "what if they think im stupid or dumb....and what if they make fun of me about my problems or whatever" ...but the one friend i have opened up lil to...shes not at all toxic...she does try to underatand...but i havent truly opened up to her either...and abt the things with school...well im one of the A grade students like i would always get over 90% in all my exams...but these past 2 yrs have been really stressful...and i just cant focus on studies anymore and recently in nov. 2021 i got my results back on one of my exams and well it wasnt great....like i didnt fail but i didnt get what i usually would get either...like it was like around 70% so...that really upset me and my parents of course...since they are both ophthalmologists...they always want their kids to get good grades i mean every parent wants that...but mine are a little forcing and have higher expectations i guess like they get soo angry when you dont get 90% so yea but thats not the family problem...the family problem is that well my dad has extremely high temper...so he gets angry really easily over the littlest things...not that this happenes all the time and hes a good dad..but you know sometimes he gets out of control and since the people of my country..especially the parents always have high expectations from their kids..they unknowingly put soo much pressure on their kids about everything!! And also my family relations are complicated cause whenever you just want to chat with or just hang out with your parents or any of your family members the conversation quickly turns into a debate of any sort! 

And finally about my sexuality its just that i keep thinking about it and i really do consider myself bisexual but like its a little difficult to like hide it...i guess thats why im always debating whether or not im bi..cause im prolly not sure...its like i want a former bi or lesbian person to confirm that im bi...

But yeah thats probably it....

Edited January 2, 2022 by Sara007

[Monsoon]

Hey Sara,

I completely get what you're saying about how you wonder about the way people will react when you open up to them; I think this is a pretty common concern and I guess the only thing you can do really is put your trust in that person to handle it well, and if they don't, choose someone else instead. What do you think? I'm wondering, when you did open up to your friend a little, how did it make you feel? I always say that a problem shared is a problem halved, and if people know what's going on, they can use their own wisdom to help you navigate this difficult time. 

Also, thank you for telling me about your sexuality and how things are at home. Have you spoken to your parents about the high expectations and how they make you feel? With your sexuality as well, do you think that someone else will be able to confirm your orientation?

[Sara007]

Hi Monsoon!

How did sharing my feelings with my friend feel...pretty nice...i did for once feel like someone understood me...but still couldnt open up fully....

And Not really...i have in the past told my parents that they shouldnt put so much pressure on us..and shouldnt burden us with their high hopes and high expectations..but they didnt seem to care that much...like i guess i should say they didnt seem to care at all...cause the burden and the pressure is all still the same as how it was before i told them about their high expectations...i mean dont get me wrong..i personally think its good to put a little pressure not like bad pressure and burden but being a lil stern with your kid isnt all that harmful...cause i think if my parents would have let me do whatever the heck i wanted to do...or live however the way i wanted to live...than i would have become a spoiled brat by now...but im not...because they were strict and taught us to value the things we have...but they think its super imp. for us to get good grades always because they think it will ruin their image and reputation considering they are one of the very well known doctors in our city...but all i want from them is a little kindness and them being understanding and not soo strict about the grades...like when i grow up no ones gonna ask me my grades except when i apply for college maybe and get a job i guess...but still other than that no ones gonna care about it...plus i have asked them in the past whether if they have never had a bad day at school or whether if they have never gotten bad grades in school...but i didnt get any reply to that question...so yea....i just wish instead of pretending to have been the best students and the best and pefect kids, they should be underatanding of our situations and remind us of their imperfect childhood cause we know that even they have had bad days....plus my dad literally admits to have bunked his classes at school and goin to watch movies with his friends...and then you say that me getting less than 90% is bad...like c'mon...and just recently my mom was like this time you NEED to get 99% in your finals...like im already upset abt my grades...and youre just rubbing salt at my wound...

Like it was just ONE lil test...I dunni why they make such a big deal out of it...

Ps. This is just recent issues with school..this is just one minor example...

But yea...thats all...

[Monsoon]

Hey there,

I'm glad that opening up made you feel understood. I'm wondering, what would it feel like for you to open up fully? What might the benefits of that be? 

Also, it does sound like there's a lot of pressure for you at home. I'm sorry that things didn't change when you spoke to them about this. I'm wondering, why do you think they put so much pressure on you? What might they be feeling?