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Confused or jut over thinking


Tater tots
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For the past few years I have had a feeling that is like I want to be a female but then I want to be a male but then not want to be any. And some days I just want to go by they/them. I also want to tell my parents this but I don't think my mom would understand. I don't know if this is just me overthinking things due to the fact that I have s disorder that makes me do that. I don't think I would be a trans male. Maybe Non-binary but right now I currently go by by she/her around my mom but I have told some of my friends they can use any pronouns for me.

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey @Tater tots

Thanks for opening up to us about this. It sounds like you're pretty confused at the moment, and I can imagine that it must be quite stressful for you. How are you feeling about it all? I'm wondering, do you feel like you could be gender fluid? As time goes on, you may decide on a set pronoun, such as he/him or she/her.  Also, when you say you have a disorder that makes you overthink, could you tell me a little bit more, please? 

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I kinda try not to think too much about it all.I have thought about gender fluid but I don’t think     
I am because the feeling of being male or just female comes and goes.Also what I mean by a disorder is that I have ADD (but people are classifying it ADHD for minors because or some weird reason )but my mom also has it.What I have found out was it make both me and my mom overthink things and then get overwhelmed by them.
 

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey,

Thanks for replying to me so quickly. Out of curiosity, can I ask, how would you define being gender fluid? 

Also, it is interesting that your ADD makes you overthink things. If you didn't have ADD, do you think you'd be questioning this?

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey,

Yeah, you're absolutely right, the feeling of being male, female, or they, comes and goes, and this is how you have been feeling too. I found it interesting because the way you feel sounds like you're fluid at the moment, or even questioning. What do you think?

Also, I'm interested to ask, if you didn't have ADD, do you think you would still be questioning? 

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  • 4 weeks later...

Sorry I was taking a time to get used to school and I was also taking a mental break.I think right now I might just need to ride the wave for now I guess I would go as questioning.Only time will tell what I am. And I am ok with that.Also I think I would still question because I always seek answers and that’s something I will never be able to change and that’s fine.

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey @Tater tots

Welcome back. How is everything going with school and your mental health? 

Yeah, I think it's good to just see where it goes for now because as time goes on, we understand ourselves more and more, and by learning to be more patient and calm with it, we can enjoy the experience more 🙂 

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey,

Yeah, we absolutely all need time out. I think we can all get easily caught up in life and forget to take time to really look after our physical and mental health, so I'm glad you were able to take some time out 🙂. What kind of things do you like to do to look after yourself and your mental health?

I'm sorry to hear about the bullying that's going on at the moment. Can I ask, have you spoken to anyone at school about the kids on the bus? If so, what did they say?

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  • 3 weeks later...

I am talking to someone about it and they said to let the bus driver know and stuff like that. Foe my mental health I do stuff like  yoga and meditating to find my center. Or since my family travels a lot I try not to thing about my other problems , to forget what is happen . I also like to clear my mind . But most of the time I like to meditate with crystals and candles.

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  • Digital Mentor

Hey there,

It's lovely to hear from you again. I noticed that it's been a couple of months since we last spoke, and I'm wondering, how has everything been for you? It's really great to hear about the stuff that helps your mental health as well; we can all help ourselves to get through challenging times, and we all know what works for our wellbeing, even if it might not seem like it at the time. Speak soon! 

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  • Digital Mentor
15 hours ago, Tater tots said:

Everything has been fine it's just the advanced work I do in class is a big load but I love the program and all the cool engineering work we do.

That sounds great! I personally find that when things are going well and I'm feeling okay I like to take note of what I'm doing so I can remember this when I'm not feeling so great. So, if for example when I'm feeling good I've been seeing friends or going swimming I try to put those in place when things aren't feeling good.  

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