Anxiety and situationships

[Cat vitale]

I am currently struggling with a situationship, I have been sleeping with a boy for nearly 6/7 months. We both got out of relationships at the start and he was in a long relationship for 3 years. My last relationship I never felt secure, he was always posting other girls on his social media and never made it look like I was his girlfriend, never felt he was my boyfriend and we would end the relationship a lot and get back together with him never knowing what he wanted , this went on for nearly 3 years. I would always be confused and I knew I loved him and I would always compare to other couples and feel like what we had was never a proper relationship because I never felt secure, but I was so scared of ending it because I thought I loved him so much and It was my first love. I fully ended things with him and now I’m seeing this new boy who I mentioned at the start, we started very casually and both thought we didn’t want a relationship,. He told me very early on he liked me and he was always chasing me and looking for my attention, he would tell me he doesn’t want to get with other girls. A month ago I saw him out with some friends and he was with girls this made me very upset and anxious and I spoke to him about it and he told me I didn’t have anything to worry about because he told me he likes me and he will not be getting with other people. I do trust him and I do believe he wouldn’t do that. However the anxiety carried on and eventually I opened up about having feelings for him , I told him I’m starting to really like him because after sleeping with him for so long this is how I felt but he told me he’s not ready to be in a relationship... This in itself exacerbated that anxiety because maybe I knew deep down this is what was going to happen, or it triggered emotions from my past relationship and the anxiety is really becoming hard to deal with. I like him so much and we have become so close that it’s so hard to hear someone doesn’t want a relationship because that is exactly what it feels like a relationship... we have been seeing eachother almost every single day for the past 6 months. the anxiety is getting hard because I keep thinking is there something wrong with me for feeling like this because it feels so raw and so strong. I really need some advice, I have finished with him as I told him my mental health is more important at the moment and what makes it 10x harder is that he lives in my same university accomodation. Please I need some advice

[Monsoon]

Hey. I realised you made a few of these posts, and I just want to let you know that I've sent you a private message with my advice