OutdoorEnthusiast13 Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 I grew up in a Christian family and I consider myself a Christian, but I've recently found that I might be bi-curious (I hope I'm using the term properly because I'm very new at this). I've just been having trouble with how okay it feels versus how wrong I have been taught it is to feel this way. So I guess I'm just wondering if anybody else is or has been in a similar situation? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted November 25, 2020 Share Posted November 25, 2020 Hey @OutdoorEnthusiast13 I just saw your other post - welcome to our community . I'm one of the digital support mentors here and I give advice to our members. So I see that you've found out that you might be bi-curious and that you're struggling a bit. I'm wondering, how are you feeling about potentially being bi-curious? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutdoorEnthusiast13 Posted November 25, 2020 Author Share Posted November 25, 2020 @Monsoon Thanks, I’m really excited to be here! I’m honestly not sure how to feel about it, I guess confused is the best way I could put it. I don’t feel like any part of me has changed, but I am glad to know more about me. I’m more struggling with it not agreeing with my religion, and I don’t really have anybody that I could talk with about this internal struggle. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted November 26, 2020 Share Posted November 26, 2020 Hey@OutdoorEnthusiast13 When you say you're struggling with it not agreeing with your religion, could you tell us a little bit more about your internal struggle with this? Religion is soooo complex and it can change the way we feel about our own sexuality. It can also make us fearful of potentially not being accepted by others around us who follow the same religion. Also, just know that we are here to help you through this - you are not alone MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutdoorEnthusiast13 Posted November 28, 2020 Author Share Posted November 28, 2020 Ya of course. So I am a Christian and because of that, I had the mindset that it was not right for a man to be in a relationship with a man, or a woman to be with another woman. Obviously, there are a lot of other beliefs that I have because of my Christianity, but that is the main one I am struggling with. I know that I am definitely attracted to both men and women, but I feel like I am having a hard time accepting myself because of what I have believed. I don't know if that makes any sense, but that is where I am currently and it has been really difficult because I have not felt comfortable enough to talk to anybody about it. I know that if I came out to my family they would be understanding in the best way that they know how, but I feel like I can't even begin to think about that before I reconcile this internal struggle for myself. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted November 30, 2020 Share Posted November 30, 2020 (edited) Hey @OutdoorEnthusiast13 What you are saying makes total sense. When you grow up with a religion telling you that two people of the same sex being together is not okay, you are bound to internalise this. This can make it hard for people who are homosexual to feel comfortable with who they are, however, the fact that you know about your internal struggle and that you're wanting to reconcile it is a good start, as some people don't get to that point for a very long time. At this point, what do you think would help you to overcome this internal struggle? Edited December 9, 2020 by Monsoon MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutdoorEnthusiast13 Posted December 9, 2020 Author Share Posted December 9, 2020 Hey @Monsoon, Sorry it took so long to respond. I don't quite know what I need to help with this struggle. So far I have found that just having all of the information that I can get helps. I also think that I need to talk with somebody that I trust about what I've been going through, it's just hard between my own fears and COVID stuff. But I am planning to come out to my closest friend and try to talk with her. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted December 9, 2020 Share Posted December 9, 2020 Hey @OutdoorEnthusiast13 It's nice to hear from you again. There is no need to apologise for taking a while to respond - we all lead busy lives! Yeah, I think you're doing the right thing by talking to someone you trust about what you've been going through. Would you like any support for how to come out to her, or are you all good? MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutdoorEnthusiast13 Posted December 10, 2020 Author Share Posted December 10, 2020 Hey @Monsoon, Umm... YES! I don't exactly know how to go about talking with her. I mean she is definitely one of my closest friends so I want to be able to talk with her about it, but I also stand to lose a lot if she doesn't accept me after I tell her. I would really appreciate any advice. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted December 10, 2020 Share Posted December 10, 2020 Hey @OutdoorEnthusiast13 Okay, so as a bit of a test run, I always ask this from people who want to know how to come out. Why don't you write a message to me here as if you were coming out to me for the first time? Try to not think about it too much and just let it all come out. This is really good practise MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OutdoorEnthusiast13 Posted December 18, 2020 Author Share Posted December 18, 2020 @Monsoon, Thank you for your advice, I wasn’t able to go over it like you suggested, but I did hang with my friend this week and I came out to her. I just kinda told her everything and I was very happy that she was so understanding and excited for me. It really helped me, and it has really helped me to feel more open about who I am, because I know that the people I care about won’t stop loving me because I’m bi. I’m also really thankful for your help too! MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monsoon Posted December 18, 2020 Share Posted December 18, 2020 Hey @OutdoorEnthusiast13 I'm really glad to hear that it went well telling your friend and that you now feel more open about who you are . Remember, we are always here if you need us. MultiQuote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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