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What's the point?!


GemmaWormald
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I mean seriously what is the point...ok so I suffer from anxiety and depression quite bad...I got attacked back in 2012 which kicked this all off...long story short I've been really low for the last couple of week..not to sure what triggered it...but I've been put on more meds...and the doctors keep fobbing me off...I'm starting councilling on wednesday but its already to late! I found my soul mate at the beginning of this year and my god I'm so in love with her...well she choice to leave me last night saying I need to concentrate on myself and I cant do that while we are together...well im broken...I've never cried so hard in my life! I dont no what to do...I cant lose her forever!! I just cant I'm so in love with her!! I just need to no where to start...start making a progress on making me happy!!

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Hey @GemmaWormald

It sounds like you have a lot going on right now, I hear you have counselling today, how did it go? Is there any updates about your ex. Break ups can hurt but they do get easier over time.

 

The best thing you can do whilst managing a change in meds a new round of therapy and also a break up is to keep as much of a steady routine and self care practice as possible. I like to carry a notebook with me wherever I go so that I can write down any thoughts that just get too loud in my brain - have you ever tried this? Here are some of our top 25 ways to self care. https://www.ditchthelabel.org/25-ways-practice-self-care/ but yours may be different. What have you done when things have gotten too much in the past?

 

Sending positivity your way,

 

Remi

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Hi Remi

 

The councilling went ok thank you...I've been given 6 sessions a hour each over the phone...which I thought might feel very strange but was kinda nice to be in my own space and talk freely...so that was ok!

 

The ex.. well she hasn't spoken to me since she left tuesday night and I dont really no what to do if I'm honest?! I love her it hurts bad that she doesnt even want to talk to me now.ice text today to say I miss her...but no reply. I'm just so broke that she could do this to me..especially when I was already in a dark place...like isnt that a bit harsh?

 

I dunno anyways I feel ok ish today ..been signed off work for a couple of weeks...what do I do now?!

 

Gemma.

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Hey Gemma,

 

I'm glad to hear counselling went well - sometimes over the phone can be really nice, to be in the comfort of your home. Make sure you find a nice private space where you won't be disturbed and have a glass of water and get settled 5 minutes before it starts so you don't feel rushed.

 

Heartbreak always hurts but i'm sure she did not intend to hurt you, you wouldn't have wanted her to stay with you for the wrong reasons, try to think of it less as something she did to you and more of a choice she made for herself. This way of thinking helps me when I wonder why people make the choices they do.

 

Having time off work to re-coup and heal is positive and you should be proud of yourself for making that positive step of self care to take some time off from work.

 

You don't need to push yourself to do anything right now, take each day as it comes and be kind to yourself, you are healing right now so just focus on looking after yourself, keeping a regular sleep and mealtime routine as well too.

 

Keep checking in with me during this time, i'm here for you.

 

Remi

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Hey Remi

 

Thank you...I'll try that for my next session...as I tend to get myself all worked up before hand then get all worried about even answering the phone...it all feels so crazy all at once...but will try the 5 minutes before hand just chill out and take the call once it comes in.

 

Oh but I'm just so confused about it all if I'm honest...I dont no what to do with myself?! Do I accept this is her final decision and start to get over her? Or do I wait and just hope that this is just her decision she has made at the moment due to all the things shes going through...see i dont know! I dont no what to do for myself!!

 

Work are really helpful and understanding which is nice...I hate that it's got to this stage where I've had to take time from work....I've lost my girlfriend it's just all so difficult and I dont even no where my head is at or even what to do. I honestly thought I was going to marry her...now I cant even get her to reply to a text?! I dont no!!

 

Also it's her birthday in a couple of weeks obviously I've brought her presents and things what do I do with them?! My head is so messy!!

 

I just dont want to accept that this is it...but think I'm going to have to!

 

A really upset Gemma x

 

 

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Hey Gemma,

It's okay to be upset, some people say a break up is one of the most devastating experiences we can go through in life. You are grieving something.

 

If she is not maing any contact then for now, it may be best to start moving forward, for your own sake and hers. That doesn't mean that there is never a chance, but at least for now ir's important to recognise that the relationship is over.

 

Try and reconnect with friends, go back to the hobbies that were set aside for your relationship and focus on falling back in love with yourself.

 

Remi

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