Having no purpose

[Anthony IV]

So recently I feel no motive to do anything. I am a youth umpire and I love it, but I have found it really hard to want to ump games. Also, as you might know, me and my former best friend have grown apart, so that doesn't help my depression since I now have no one to talk to. The other night I was walking to my room from the shower and I felt like I just got punched in the gut, HARD. I fell to a knee and was in the brink of tears when I realized I wasn't actually punched. I just started thinking of last summer when my ex-griend was over to my house all the time. So I cried myself to sleep, as normal. The next morning I thought of something. Me trying to get over losing my friend was doable. But losing my friend and my crush, was much harder. I feel like I have nothing left for me, and everything I think or do reminds me of him. I really need help trying to get over him. Its killing me physically and mentally

[Blondie]

@Anthony IV The utter tiredness and exhaustion of depression can at times be really overwhelming so maybe try to reduce things to 'step-by-step'. When we're feeling low it's easy to tell ourselves we've achieved nothing which doesn't help with motivation etc.

 

Try to flip that around to congratulating yourself for even the smallest routine things, even if it's like "I got up today and showered." By doing this we switch our thought processes around to realise that we are doing actually pretty well and coping with how we are currently feeling.

 

It's also entirely possible to feel deep feelings physically - I've experienced this myself, it's like being punched in the solar plexus and almost makes you keel over at times. Take time to acknowledge how you feel and breathe through it before moving on.