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I'm not sure what my sexuality is


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I'm not really sure what my sexuality is.

I don't really feel much attraction to any gender, and if there's the rare occasion that I do it's not a specific gender. To be honest, I'm more focused on studying and enjoying my life by myself at the minute and I'm not sure whether this will change.


I have a few friends who are gay or transgender, but I'm not really sure where I stand.


I have done a few tests, but the answer is always inconsistent and I can't really figure out what I'm meant to think.

I think I may be asexual, but I'm not entirely sure.


I was wondering if anyone here could help me, even slightly as I'm confused with who I am.

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Hello @Articfoxez


A big welcome to our community, we're glad you found us here...


It's great that you are focusing on yourself right now. Sometimes it feels like society pushes you to get into a relationship or to make big choices about who you are attracted to but there really is no rush to decide.


A test can only give you a very tiny insight into your sexuality, the truth is you are the only person that can figure out your sexuality. Questioning as this point is completely normal, and not having any sexual urges in your teens is normal too. I know it may not be the answer you are looking for right now, but confusion is normal. Give yourself time to work out who you are and your sexuality should fit in there somewhere. Keep an open mind and keep having conversations with your friends.






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I've heard there's something where people genuinely just aren't attracted to anyone, like not fully. You might find someone particularly pretty, or charming, but never 'oh my god I need to try and have coffee with them' or something. I thought I was like you for a while: I still am in a way. I was MUCH more into life and studying, never a relationship. Now, I'm kinda in a relationship with my trans friend. I'm bisexual - I kinda would say pansexual, as I don't really care on the gender, just the person, like if i find them hot and fall in love, so be it. But i do, still, hold my firm ground in studying and enjoying life. You may also just not be ready for it. I'm 18 and only now starting up a relationship, my first EVER one. So, if you want to keep up with enjoying life and studying, you do that. If its more important to you, you go for it. Sexuality, it does matter, but if you're set on enjoying life and studying, it doesn't matter as much, because you'll find out eventually. Considering that you said you've found some people attractive and they were no particular gender, maybe you are bisexual/pansexual. Give yourself time to work it out, you'll find it eventually. I didn't find or pay attention to mine for a long time, it wasn't that important to me. Now I've come out as bi and im starting up a relationship, it matters more. I found it. So, in short, don't worry, and focus on what you love, what makes you happy. Thats what matters most :)

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