My boyfriend has depression

[baseballfan2004]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a few months now, and since we been dating he has not been doing well, he has depression.. he been sleeping 12 plus hours a day barely eating, we don't live together so its hard with my schedule to go over a lot, he lost his job and his car isn't working so for him everything is crumbling down and I am all he has. His family also doesn't support him because he moved to California by himself to purse to become a firefighter. so they don't help. I've been doing my best to keep company and buy groceries here and there but he has a bit of a macho vibe so its hard for me to do somethings In order to help and still make him feel like a man. I just don't know what else to do at this point. he has been thinking of Going back home but I cant even help do that.

 

[Remi]

Hey @baseballfan2004 ,

 

Welcome to community and thanks for sharing that here, it can be really tough supporting partners when they are going through a difficult time so - 'well done' for being so supportive through all of this.

One thing I always say to people that are supporting others is to practice lots of self-care and just make sure you are keeping an eye on your own mental health. You will be no use to anyone else if you are burned out yourself. I know it feels like everything falls on your shoulders right now, but you are only one person and can't do it all.

 

Has he seen a Dr or a counsellor about how he is feeling? I would encourage him to see help if he is feeling low to share the support out with professionals. I would also encourage him to speak to someone in his family, a sibling maybe? I'm sure if his family knew he wasn't doing so well they may help?

 

It is still a relatively new relationship so please don't think it is all your responsibility or your fault.

 

Are there any other local friends he has that you could talk to on his behalf?

 

-Remi

Edited February 13, 2019 by Remi