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WWYD? friend sh-ing? TW SH


swiftie_am_i? Β  Β 

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hi so I have a friend a year older than me who, we're not super close. however, we've talked ab mental health and stuff. (mostly regarding a teacher who doesn't believe in mental health and thinks that sh-ing is for attention. she used to sh and says she's 3 months free but some scars look younger than 3 months. as I mentioned we aren't very close and I don't wanna cross boundaries but I'm nervous for her?? HELP!

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16 hours ago, swiftie_am_i? said:

hi so I have a friend a year older than me who, we're not super close. however, we've talked ab mental health and stuff. (mostly regarding a teacher who doesn't believe in mental health and thinks that sh-ing is for attention. she used to sh and says she's 3 months free but some scars look younger than 3 months. as I mentioned we aren't very close and I don't wanna cross boundaries but I'm nervous for her?? HELP!

Hi @swiftie_am_i?Β - thanks so much for reaching out and sharing this situation with us. You have done the right thing in seeking out further advice, and you are clearly a considerate and caring friend, albeit not a close one to this person. Nonetheless, they probably sense they can trust you if they have spoken about self-harm with you.

You're right to be mindful of crossing boundaries, but perhaps you could speak to them again and just ask how they are doing? This might open the door for them to share a little more about how they are feeling.

It's possible that they might address SH organically when talking with you. In which case, you could ask them if they have sought out any support from a school counsellor, parent or other professional. If they haven't, this would be a useful suggestion to make, as this is something that people need help to overcome. How does that sound?

Also, how are you doing? This can be a tough thing to hear and deal with, so I hope you are doing okay. If you would like to speak further in private, you can always contact us on Confidential Support and we can continue the conversation there:Β https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/support

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5 hours ago, Lennie said:

Hi @swiftie_am_i?Β - thanks so much for reaching out and sharing this situation with us. You have done the right thing in seeking out further advice, and you are clearly a considerate and caring friend, albeit not a close one to this person. Nonetheless, they probably sense they can trust you if they have spoken about self-harm with you.

You're right to be mindful of crossing boundaries, but perhaps you could speak to them again and just ask how they are doing? This might open the door for them to share a little more about how they are feeling.

It's possible that they might address SH organically when talking with you. In which case, you could ask them if they have sought out any support from a school counsellor, parent or other professional. If they haven't, this would be a useful suggestion to make, as this is something that people need help to overcome. How does that sound?

Also, how are you doing? This can be a tough thing to hear and deal with, so I hope you are doing okay. If you would like to speak further in private, you can always contact us on Confidential Support and we can continue the conversation there:Β https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/support

Im alright. only like 16 days of school left! and I hate school

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22 hours ago, swiftie_am_i? said:

hi so I have a friend a year older than me who, we're not super close. however, we've talked ab mental health and stuff. (mostly regarding a teacher who doesn't believe in mental health and thinks that sh-ing is for attention. she used to sh and says she's 3 months free but some scars look younger than 3 months. as I mentioned we aren't very close and I don't wanna cross boundaries but I'm nervous for her?? HELP!

I'd ask her if she's okay; or if she wants to talk about anything. You don't have to mention the sh-ing directly, but make sure that you show her you're open to talk to or that you care and want to know if anything comes up so that she can talk about it with you.

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2 hours ago, swiftie_am_i? said:

Im alright. only like 16 days of school left! and I hate school

Glad you're okay. I completely understand where you're coming from with not liking school. Β Sometimes the environment or the people just aren't well suited to who we are. I guess the good news, then, is school is almost over.Β 

Do you have anything planned that you're looking forward to after you leave school, like going to college, going on holiday, starting a new job, etc.?

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4 minutes ago, Lennie said:

Glad you're okay. I completely understand where you're coming from with not liking school. Β Sometimes the environment or the people just aren't well suited to who we are. I guess the good news, then, is school is almost over.Β 

Do you have anything planned that you're looking forward to after you leave school, like going to college, going on holiday, starting a new job, etc.?

def not old enough to go to college (5ish years ig) but im going to chicago for a month to stay with my aunt!

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11 minutes ago, swiftie_am_i? said:

def not old enough to go to college (5ish years ig) but im going to chicago for a month to stay with my aunt!

Ah yes, sorry I'm using British terminology. Here 'college' is where you go after high school usually between 16-18 years old, and then on to university, which you call college. It's all very confusing.

Nice! I've never been to Chicago, but it looks a great place to visit and see sites like Millennium Park.

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2 hours ago, Lennie said:

Ah yes, sorry I'm using British terminology. Here 'college' is where you go after high school usually between 16-18 years old, and then on to university, which you call college. It's all very confusing.

Nice! I've never been to Chicago, but it looks a great place to visit and see sites like Millennium Park.

Ohhhhhh that makes more sense. I was wondering why all of you were going to college so early lmao. So is it like, Primary 6-9, Elementary 10-13, High school 14-15, college 16-18? Ngl, That's kinda weird. But schooling is more streamed in the UK, right?

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12 hours ago, Emberfrost12 said:

Ohhhhhh that makes more sense. I was wondering why all of you were going to college so early lmao. So is it like, Primary 6-9, Elementary 10-13, High school 14-15, college 16-18? Ngl, That's kinda weird. But schooling is more streamed in the UK, right?

Yes, the school system in the UKΒ  is structured differently and has different names for the different stages of schooling than the US. roughly speaking, it goes: Primary (5-11) > Secondary/ High School (11 - 16) > College/ Sixth Form (16 -18) > University (18+).Β  So yeah, if often gets confusing when comparing US and UK schoolingΒ πŸ˜΅β€πŸ’«

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20 hours ago, Lennie said:

Ah yes, sorry I'm using British terminology. Here 'college' is where you go after high school usually between 16-18 years old, and then on to university, which you call college. It's all very confusing.

Nice! I've never been to Chicago, but it looks a great place to visit and see sites like Millennium Park.

OHHHHH IM SLOWWWΒ 

my b lol

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5 hours ago, Lennie said:

Yes, the school system in the UKΒ  is structured differently and has different names for the different stages of schooling than the US. roughly speaking, it goes: Primary (5-11) > Secondary/ High School (11 - 16) > College/ Sixth Form (16 -18) > University (18+).Β  So yeah, if often gets confusing when comparing US and UK schoolingΒ πŸ˜΅β€πŸ’«

Ohhhhh. Makes sense

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5 hours ago, Lennie said:

Yes, the school system in the UKΒ  is structured differently and has different names for the different stages of schooling than the US. roughly speaking, it goes: Primary (5-11) > Secondary/ High School (11 - 16) > College/ Sixth Form (16 -18) > University (18+).Β  So yeah, if often gets confusing when comparing US and UK schoolingΒ πŸ˜΅β€πŸ’«

yeah, i never knew that! interesting fact i learned today!

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Yeah, it's just another in a long list of things that the UK and US seem to have different terms for (coriander-cilantro, lift-elevator, boot-trunk...)Β πŸ™‚

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2 hours ago, Lennie said:

Yeah, it's just another in a long list of things that the UK and US seem to have different terms for (coriander-cilantro, lift-elevator, boot-trunk...)Β πŸ™‚

Huh.

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