Stress and feeling unmotivated

[June_Bug]

Ok, so I am preparing for graduation in the spring and I am graduating a year early. This alone is stressful (what with applying for stuff and deadlines etc). But I am also under a lot of emotional stress bc of the recent loss of my big sister and a bad falling out with my best friend and being at a brand new school for 1 yr then leaving and family drama and my mom always being too busy w her job and my other siblings. It's honestly kind of a struggle just to keep it together every day. 

Anywho, I can do work and deal with stuff, but I'm starting to hit a wall of being unmotivated to do basically anything, even things I enjoy doing like writing music. In the past I have always kind of enjoyed school bc it gave me something to do and it was interesting and I got to see friends. I did well because I cared about learning. But recently, it feels like my life has just been lightly painted over with gray. I don't feel like doing school or going to school (which is normal for most ppl my age, but not me personally). It's concerning because I need to be working hard to graduate in May as I intend to.

Advice or insights?

[Madeleine_357]

19 hours ago, June_Bug said:

Ok, so I am preparing for graduation in the spring and I am graduating a year early. This alone is stressful (what with applying for stuff and deadlines etc). But I am also under a lot of emotional stress bc of the recent loss of my big sister and a bad falling out with my best friend and being at a brand new school for 1 yr then leaving and family drama and my mom always being too busy w her job and my other siblings. It's honestly kind of a struggle just to keep it together every day. 

Anywho, I can do work and deal with stuff, but I'm starting to hit a wall of being unmotivated to do basically anything, even things I enjoy doing like writing music. In the past I have always kind of enjoyed school bc it gave me something to do and it was interesting and I got to see friends. I did well because I cared about learning. But recently, it feels like my life has just been lightly painted over with gray. I don't feel like doing school or going to school (which is normal for most ppl my age, but not me personally). It's concerning because I need to be working hard to graduate in May as I intend to.

Advice or insights?

Hi! So I've been feeling kinda unmotivated right now too, so I can relate.

It clearly sounds like you have A LOT of stuff going on in your life outside of school. Do you think maybe the stress from family and friends stuff is maybe carrying over into school? Obviously it's normal for you to be stressed about graduating and school work, and that stress could be causing your lack of motivation, but I'm sure everything else are contributing factors.

You said you like writing music? How do you normally like get inspo for that? Do you listen to other songs, take in inspo from yr ouside environment, etc? 

Sorry Kinda chucking question after question at you, but you're at a new school, right? 

[June_Bug]

Yes, I imagine everything is playing into everything else and creating a tangled web of negative feelings. Ig I'm wondering what I can do to fix that.

And yes! Including finished and unfinished songs I have well over 100 :)

I get inspiration from my life, from other's lives, from concepts, from literature.. almost anything

[Madeleine_357]

1 hour ago, June_Bug said:

Yes, I imagine everything is playing into everything else and creating a tangled web of negative feelings. Ig I'm wondering what I can do to fix that.

And yes! Including finished and unfinished songs I have well over 100 :)

I get inspiration from my life, from other's lives, from concepts, from literature.. almost anything

 

ok! It's really cool that you have created some songs of your own! If you ever upload them anywhere, like a digtial streaming platform or something, I would definitely listen to them! 

Ahem. Anyways, getting back on track. 

You need things you can do to fix your unmotivated problem. *thinks intently* Well, when it comes to school work, there's a few things I like to do:

1. Open up whatever it is I need to complete my homework, get everything laid out

2. Pop in my earbuds and play a song (like a fast paced pop song or a pump up song) that I know will get my brain going and kinda turn me on in a way. (NOT THAT KIND OF TURN ME ON)

3. If you can focus on homework while you have music playing, I suggest doing that. (honestly,  minecraft music helps me focus as well. Strange, I know)

4. Just force yourself to start doing the homework. once you get into the groove of it, it'll be easier to stay in the groove and get something done

5. Take breaks! Start off slow, and get at least one thing done, (like a math question or something) and then take a small break before starting again

6. Set a goal for getting something done and set a reward in advance. (ex. I do this page of science work, and once I'm done, I get to scroll on my phone, or read my book)

 

For the tangled web of feelings, something I've started doing to help me get a more positive outlook on life is keep a gratitude journal. Every day, I write the date and then 3 things I'm grateful for in a notebook. You could even add a twist to it and google a quote and write it down with the gratitude's as your quote for the day. Get into good habits! It apparently takes 21 days to get into a habit, so remind yourself of what you want to get out of creating good habits for those 21 days. It's like, for me, having to wake up at 6:30 every morning. I remind myself that I want to set good sleeping habits, and that I need time to get ready for school. You could also try just writing out a list of the emotions you're feeling. Talking things out with someone trusted can always be good too.

I'm not sure if this was really what you were looking for in an answer, so if I'm completely off and it's something else you needed help with  PLEASE lmk so I can change my response. 

What happened with your bsf?

(I'm sorry my thought process is so scattered )

 

[June_Bug]

For the music, no not yet but I plan to put my first song on Spotify over spring break

 

As for your suggestions, they are all good. I will try them out and see if they work! I already talk to ppl abt what I'm feeling and it's very helpful.

What happened w me and my BSF? That would take a *very* long time to explain bc our relationship wasn't normal to begin with. Going into that would probably take an entire different post.

[Madeleine_357]

9 hours ago, June_Bug said:

For the music, no not yet but I plan to put my first song on Spotify over spring break

As for your suggestions, they are all good. I will try them out and see if they work! I already talk to ppl abt what I'm feeling and it's very helpful.

What happened w me and my BSF? That would take a *very* long time to explain bc our relationship wasn't normal to begin with. Going into that would probably take an entire different post.

lol yeah I understand the long explanation about the falling out with the best friends thing. It happened to me not too long ago too. it's like we're living the same life 

Lmk when you release yr first song and I'll def go listen to it!!!

[Aurora]

On 2/27/2024 at 2:28 AM, June_Bug said:

Ok, so I am preparing for graduation in the spring and I am graduating a year early. This alone is stressful (what with applying for stuff and deadlines etc). But I am also under a lot of emotional stress bc of the recent loss of my big sister and a bad falling out with my best friend and being at a brand new school for 1 yr then leaving and family drama and my mom always being too busy w her job and my other siblings. It's honestly kind of a struggle just to keep it together every day. 

Anywho, I can do work and deal with stuff, but I'm starting to hit a wall of being unmotivated to do basically anything, even things I enjoy doing like writing music. In the past I have always kind of enjoyed school bc it gave me something to do and it was interesting and I got to see friends. I did well because I cared about learning. But recently, it feels like my life has just been lightly painted over with gray. I don't feel like doing school or going to school (which is normal for most ppl my age, but not me personally). It's concerning because I need to be working hard to graduate in May as I intend to.

Advice or insights?

Hi @June_Bug, thanks so much for reaching out and letting us know what's going on for you. I can see that  @Madeleine_357 is already giving you some great advice and I don't want to interrupt your conversation so I have sent you a message on confidential support instead. You should be able to access it here https://forums.ditchthelabel.org/support/ We're here for you!