Anyone wanna talk about bullying they have experienced

[Steven_]

i personally get bullied a lot in middle school. people keep calling me names, it feels like everybody is against me. I am in grade 8. Any advice of what i should do about it?

[Duckie]

8 hours ago, Steven435324 said:

i personally get bullied a lot in middle school. people keep calling me names, it feels like everybody is against me. I am in grade 8. Any advice of what i should do about it?

Hi Steven,

My name is Duckie and I'm one of the support mentors. Welcome to Ditch the Label and thank you for sharing your experience with us.

I'm really sorry to hear people are bullying you. How long has this been going on for? Are the school or your parents aware of what's happening to you at school? I think it's definitely a good idea to make everyone aware of what's happening so that they can interfere and deal with the people causing you to feel like this. Are you receiving any support on this from your school?

Please know that bullying is never your fault. You might wonder why these people choose to act like this and I want to tell you that people that are happy and secure do not bully. Only people who are really insecure, feel they need to establish power over someone by calling them names and harrassing them. You are not alone and we are here to listen.

[Xwisdom]

I got bullied from nursery to year 9 in my first secondary school. As well I got called names by people when I was just walking around, people I'd never met. I had several instances of people telling me to kill myself or how they'd like to see me killed. I didn't even know wether to put it in the tags or not because I don't want to invalidate or seem to be begging for sympathy. But on a school trip I had two boys pinching my bum, at the time I didn't think much about it since I have had some trauma around it since feeling dirty, feeling out of control, feeling like I could get hurt or touched by anyone at anytime. Every where I was getting some kind of abuse, I felt alienated in church, in school would call me fat or just generally make fun of me cause of my hair colour or tremors or anything, my sister would push me, pinch me and talk down to me, my dad was manipulative and my mum and dad would argue below my room almost every night. In 2013 I tried to step out in front of traffic but was pulled back. My first school then decided they couldn't support me because of my rapidly declining mental health and what was diagnosed as autism. In 2020 ish I used a key to scratch myself because my life didn't feel real and I felt pain was the only way I could make sure. I do still have  a whole heap of problems and my mental is not perfect but for anyone in a similair situation to mine. It's not you fault and I know nothing I can say will make it all better and go away. But if you can learn to have confidence in yourself, and maybe join clubs and make a small group of friends, learn techniques to cope ,distract your mind and also reach out to people. You can make it through. I believe in you. But more importantly you need to learn to believe in you. You can do it.

[Duckie]

10 hours ago, Xwisdom said:

I got bullied from nursery to year 9 in my first secondary school. As well I got called names by people when I was just walking around, people I'd never met. I had several instances of people telling me to kill myself or how they'd like to see me killed. I didn't even know wether to put it in the tags or not because I don't want to invalidate or seem to be begging for sympathy. But on a school trip I had two boys pinching my bum, at the time I didn't think much about it since I have had some trauma around it since feeling dirty, feeling out of control, feeling like I could get hurt or touched by anyone at anytime. Every where I was getting some kind of abuse, I felt alienated in church, in school would call me fat or just generally make fun of me cause of my hair colour or tremors or anything, my sister would push me, pinch me and talk down to me, my dad was manipulative and my mum and dad would argue below my room almost every night. In 2013 I tried to step out in front of traffic but was pulled back. My first school then decided they couldn't support me because of my rapidly declining mental health and what was diagnosed as autism. In 2020 ish I used a key to scratch myself because my life didn't feel real and I felt pain was the only way I could make sure. I do still have  a whole heap of problems and my mental is not perfect but for anyone in a similair situation to mine. It's not you fault and I know nothing I can say will make it all better and go away. But if you can learn to have confidence in yourself, and maybe join clubs and make a small group of friends, learn techniques to cope ,distract your mind and also reach out to people. You can make it through. I believe in you. But more importantly you need to learn to believe in you. You can do it.

Hi @Xwisdom,

Thank you so much for sharing your story here. It is so important for people to know that they are not alone.

I am really sorry for what you've been through. Bullying really breaks into your core and causes you to believe things about yourself that just aren't true. This is a safe space and it is OK to talk about what you've been through. It sound like you didn't really get to feel safe and secure anywhere when you were little. It sounds like your sister contributed to the bullying being a part of your home life as well. Have you ever brough it up with you sister and how it made you feel at the time?

If you ever want to talk about anything you raised here, we are always available in confidential support too.

[Xwisdom]

1 hour ago, Duckie said:

Hi @Xwisdom,

Thank you so much for sharing your story here. It is so important for people to know that they are not alone.

I am really sorry for what you've been through. Bullying really breaks into your core and causes you to believe things about yourself that just aren't true. This is a safe space and it is OK to talk about what you've been through. It sound like you didn't really get to feel safe and secure anywhere when you were little. It sounds like your sister contributed to the bullying being a part of your home life as well. Have you ever brough it up with you sister and how it made you feel at the time?

If you ever want to talk about anything you raised here, we are always available in confidential support too.

My sister doesn't talk to me she has also moved away. 

[Duckie]

2 minutes ago, Xwisdom said:

My sister doesn't talk to me she has also moved away. 

What helped you get out of your bad situation?

[Xwisdom]

8 minutes ago, Duckie said:

What helped you get out of your bad situation?

Lot's of different things therapy, online communities, hobbies but mostly realising people's opinions shouldn't matter because they don't know me and don't know what I have been through or what I am going through. 

[Duckie]

9 minutes ago, Xwisdom said:

Lot's of different things therapy, online communities, hobbies but mostly realising people's opinions shouldn't matter because they don't know me and don't know what I have been through or what I am going through. 

I think that's a very valid point and I'm happy it's made you feel a lot better :) You've shed light on some really important ways to cope with bullying which is fantastic! Thank you so much!

[Steven_]

On 9/26/2023 at 4:03 PM, Xwisdom said:

I got bullied from nursery to year 9 in my first secondary school. As well I got called names by people when I was just walking around, people I'd never met. I had several instances of people telling me to kill myself or how they'd like to see me killed. I didn't even know wether to put it in the tags or not because I don't want to invalidate or seem to be begging for sympathy. But on a school trip I had two boys pinching my bum, at the time I didn't think much about it since I have had some trauma around it since feeling dirty, feeling out of control, feeling like I could get hurt or touched by anyone at anytime. Every where I was getting some kind of abuse, I felt alienated in church, in school would call me fat or just generally make fun of me cause of my hair colour or tremors or anything, my sister would push me, pinch me and talk down to me, my dad was manipulative and my mum and dad would argue below my room almost every night. In 2013 I tried to step out in front of traffic but was pulled back. My first school then decided they couldn't support me because of my rapidly declining mental health and what was diagnosed as autism. In 2020 ish I used a key to scratch myself because my life didn't feel real and I felt pain was the only way I could make sure. I do still have  a whole heap of problems and my mental is not perfect but for anyone in a similair situation to mine. It's not you fault and I know nothing I can say will make it all better and go away. But if you can learn to have confidence in yourself, and maybe join clubs and make a small group of friends, learn techniques to cope ,distract your mind and also reach out to people. You can make it through. I believe in you. But more importantly you need to learn to believe in you. You can do it.

 

your bullying situation is a lot like mine! How did you deal with it? When I walk to school everyday i feel like i cannot trust anyone and that i might me bullied i looked at the people that bully me

[Hiiya]

On 9/19/2023 at 6:58 PM, Steven435324 said:

i personally get bullied a lot in middle school. people keep calling me names, it feels like everybody is against me. I am in grade 8. Any advice of what i should do about it?

I don't get bullied directly but a few of the more popular people at my school always find a way to blame me for things I didn't do. Just last week I was accused of stealing one of the cheerleaders phones and got suspended for it, neither the school staff of my mom believed me, it was really hard for me but I'm fine now and I have people to talk to so I don't feel alone

Edited October 12, 2023 by Hiiya

[Steven_]

i feel you i also get accused of stuff i didn't do a lot of the times. For example just 1 week ago the popular kids at school accused me of taking their binder(which i didn't do btw) they did that just to make fun of me because they have noyone else to pick on

[Hiiya]

They're jerks but we can at least try our best to ignore them 

[Xwisdom]

8 hours ago, Steven435324 said:

your bullying situation is a lot like mine! How did you deal with it? When I walk to school everyday i feel like i cannot trust anyone and that i might me bullied i looked at the people that bully me

Well, the school I was at provided me a leave 5 minute early pass because I was getting bullied on the way home. They provided me a mentor as well. I’ve also had multiple appointments with therapists. I joined multiple clubs and built up friendships. Unfortunately I don’t think there’s one root thing I can point to that helped. And because people are so unique what worked for me might not work for you. But the major thing that helped me was finding more confidence, what did it for me was I realised this is my life, the people who say these things about me, don’t know me so why should I care. I know how difficult situations like these are and it may seem you have little control but you have to realise you have the control to not care. You have the control to reach out to people like you have done. Taking the first step can often be the hardest but it starts you on a journey that once finished can be very rewarding. And I want to congratulate you because you have taken that first step by reaching out to DTL, if you haven’t already it would be a good idea to reach out to a parent, teacher or both. I hope your situation improves. 

[Steven_]

thanks that really means a lot

[Megs-]

how're you? hope you're keeping well <3