LIFEISHARD Posted March 12, 2023 Share Posted March 12, 2023 I decided to write a fantasy book. I only finished a short chapter one, but would like some opinions for other people! The chapter is below. Chapter 1 - Where the story ends, or begins! She rushes to the battle field ready to fight anything that gets in her path to save the kingdom. She cuts through bushes, branches, and nets to get to the dragon, at last she takes a jump and slices off the dragon's head! As Pearl was celebrating with her friends she thought to herself ´This scene had seemed all too familiar…´ ¨As it should be!¨said a mysterious voice in the shadows behind. Everyone Froze in shock. A little light gray head popped out of the shadows, followed by a little gray body with baby blue stripes, a fluffy tail, and four small paws. Pearl asked ¨Who are you and what do you want with me and my friends?¨ ¨I am the cat named Bell and I want for you to go back to the start!¨ Bell replied ¨And to see what you did wrong.¨ In a sudden, bright flash Pearl was where she had started, but she didn't remember that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Digital Mentor Aurora Posted March 14, 2023 Digital Mentor Share Posted March 14, 2023 On 3/12/2023 at 9:28 AM, LIFEISHARD said: I decided to write a fantasy book. I only finished a short chapter one, but would like some opinions for other people! The chapter is below. Chapter 1 - Where the story ends, or begins! She rushes to the battle field ready to fight anything that gets in her path to save the kingdom. She cuts through bushes, branches, and nets to get to the dragon, at last she takes a jump and slices off the dragon's head! As Pearl was celebrating with her friends she thought to herself ´This scene had seemed all too familiar…´ ¨As it should be!¨said a mysterious voice in the shadows behind. Everyone Froze in shock. A little light gray head popped out of the shadows, followed by a little gray body with baby blue stripes, a fluffy tail, and four small paws. Pearl asked ¨Who are you and what do you want with me and my friends?¨ ¨I am the cat named Bell and I want for you to go back to the start!¨ Bell replied ¨And to see what you did wrong.¨ In a sudden, bright flash Pearl was where she had started, but she didn't remember that! I think that's a great idea for a first chapter. It draws you in immediately and you're intrigued to find out what this is all about! Have you got the outline for your whole book already? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LIFEISHARD Posted March 14, 2023 Author Share Posted March 14, 2023 9 hours ago, Aurora said: I think that's a great idea for a first chapter. It draws you in immediately and you're intrigued to find out what this is all about! Have you got the outline for your whole book already? No I haven’t I am currently working on the third chapter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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