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rant about my sibling bullying me


stellazzz    

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a vent post 

 

i need to get it out there i guess 

my younger sister (12) has been bullying me (16) since she had teeth. she would bite me. 

im autistic, and im not good at conveying things, or talking with people, or handling anything that hurts my feelings. and it feels impossible to defend myself against mean words 

as my sister and i grew up, she would say mean things to me. and break my stuff. and, we would find a shared interest and things would be great, until she would realize i like that thing more than her and then she would become a hater and make fun of me for liking whatever it was i liked. 

she just doesnt know how to treat people. she only cares about herself. a self obsessed 12 year old is one of the worst types of siblings to have. 

so, 10 or so years of bullying by my own sister. hows my self esteem? NONEXISTENT! 

whenever i say something good about myself, i know its actually not true. my sister has pointed out all the bad aspects of my subhuman being and thats all i can see now. ive been bullied in school too, mostly middle school and im in high school now but i dont just forget and forgive like that. (this is more common among autistic people)

i remember my preschool bullies. two boys named finn and hayden who forbade girls from playing in the sandbox. 

anyway, some stuff that my sister has said both last year and this year. 

"you dress like a homeless person" 

"you joined a DnD club?? youre so stupid! no wonder no one likes you! HAHA YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS!!!"

"stop trying to make everything gay and autistic" "OUuoUU lOOK aT MEE im AutISTIC lESbiAn (said mockingly while shaking arround with her tounge stuck out)"

"imagine liking that ching chong bing bong north korean aNiMEe trash"

"i will cut off all your ugly ass hair while youre sleeping"

"mom says the 80 year old men you talk to online are going to rape you haha"  

theres much more than that. this is a decent sample of the variety though. 

my parents seem to not be able to do anything to her, wether its punishment or a talking to, they continue to act like shes normal and not exhibiting early signs of literal psychopathy?? she bullies me for the way i stand. and tells her friends im just her cousin whos visiting. because shes "embarrassed to be related" to me. she flicks paint onto my artwork. she manipulates my other little sister into harassing me. and my parents are like "she will grow out of it" "someday youll be best friends like me and my sister" 

it makes me so angry. a lot at myself, because i am weak and stupid and am letting a fucking 12 year old have power over my life. im a stupid ugly freak who has been cursed with the extra extra sensitive type of autism. im an idiot for telling her that im a lesbian. for telling her anything about myself at all, my brain must be filled with air. 

 

 


 

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23 hours ago, stellazzz said:

a vent post 

i need to get it out there i guess 

my younger sister (12) has been bullying me (16) since she had teeth. she would bite me. 

im autistic, and im not good at conveying things, or talking with people, or handling anything that hurts my feelings. and it feels impossible to defend myself against mean words 

as my sister and i grew up, she would say mean things to me. and break my stuff. and, we would find a shared interest and things would be great, until she would realize i like that thing more than her and then she would become a hater and make fun of me for liking whatever it was i liked. 

she just doesnt know how to treat people. she only cares about herself. a self obsessed 12 year old is one of the worst types of siblings to have. 

so, 10 or so years of bullying by my own sister. hows my self esteem? NONEXISTENT! 

whenever i say something good about myself, i know its actually not true. my sister has pointed out all the bad aspects of my subhuman being and thats all i can see now. ive been bullied in school too, mostly middle school and im in high school now but i dont just forget and forgive like that. (this is more common among autistic people)

i remember my preschool bullies. two boys named finn and hayden who forbade girls from playing in the sandbox. 

anyway, some stuff that my sister has said both last year and this year. 

"you dress like a homeless person" 

"you joined a DnD club?? youre so stupid! no wonder no one likes you! HAHA YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS!!!"

"stop trying to make everything gay and autistic" "OUuoUU lOOK aT MEE im AutISTIC lESbiAn (said mockingly while shaking arround with her tounge stuck out)"

"imagine liking that ching chong bing bong north korean aNiMEe trash"

"i will cut off all your ugly ass hair while youre sleeping"

"mom says the 80 year old men you talk to online are going to rape you haha"  

theres much more than that. this is a decent sample of the variety though. 

my parents seem to not be able to do anything to her, wether its punishment or a talking to, they continue to act like shes normal and not exhibiting early signs of literal psychopathy?? she bullies me for the way i stand. and tells her friends im just her cousin whos visiting. because shes "embarrassed to be related" to me. she flicks paint onto my artwork. she manipulates my other little sister into harassing me. and my parents are like "she will grow out of it" "someday youll be best friends like me and my sister" 

it makes me so angry. a lot at myself, because i am weak and stupid and am letting a fucking 12 year old have power over my life. im a stupid ugly freak who has been cursed with the extra extra sensitive type of autism. im an idiot for telling her that im a lesbian. for telling her anything about myself at all, my brain must be filled with air. 


 

Heyy @stellazzz, I am Luie one of the support mentors with Ditch the Label. I see that you're new to our platform and I wanted to say a massive welcome to our community, we're glad that you have joined us here. 

I am truly sorry to hear how things have been going on with your sister throughout your life. It sounds distressing and hurtful with all the incidents that you have shared here. It can be an added challenge when parents as well think of this as 'just a phase'. I do not think that you are stupid or weak, I do hear you though and see why you're feeling angry and frustrated about sharing a personal aspect about your life with her. You mentioned having an extra sensitive autism, would you like to share more on this with me (i.e. if you're comfortable doing so)? 

I would like to mention that we do have a one to one support on the top tab next to blogs where it says 'Confidential support' if you'd feel more comfortable there. Here for you! 

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On 1/27/2023 at 10:36 AM, stellazzz said:

a vent post 

i need to get it out there i guess 

my younger sister (12) has been bullying me (16) since she had teeth. she would bite me. 

im autistic, and im not good at conveying things, or talking with people, or handling anything that hurts my feelings. and it feels impossible to defend myself against mean words 

as my sister and i grew up, she would say mean things to me. and break my stuff. and, we would find a shared interest and things would be great, until she would realize i like that thing more than her and then she would become a hater and make fun of me for liking whatever it was i liked. 

she just doesnt know how to treat people. she only cares about herself. a self obsessed 12 year old is one of the worst types of siblings to have. 

so, 10 or so years of bullying by my own sister. hows my self esteem? NONEXISTENT! 

whenever i say something good about myself, i know its actually not true. my sister has pointed out all the bad aspects of my subhuman being and thats all i can see now. ive been bullied in school too, mostly middle school and im in high school now but i dont just forget and forgive like that. (this is more common among autistic people)

i remember my preschool bullies. two boys named finn and hayden who forbade girls from playing in the sandbox. 

anyway, some stuff that my sister has said both last year and this year. 

"you dress like a homeless person" 

"you joined a DnD club?? youre so stupid! no wonder no one likes you! HAHA YOU HAVE NO FRIENDS!!!"

"stop trying to make everything gay and autistic" "OUuoUU lOOK aT MEE im AutISTIC lESbiAn (said mockingly while shaking arround with her tounge stuck out)"

"imagine liking that ching chong bing bong north korean aNiMEe trash"

"i will cut off all your ugly ass hair while youre sleeping"

"mom says the 80 year old men you talk to online are going to rape you haha"  

theres much more than that. this is a decent sample of the variety though. 

my parents seem to not be able to do anything to her, wether its punishment or a talking to, they continue to act like shes normal and not exhibiting early signs of literal psychopathy?? she bullies me for the way i stand. and tells her friends im just her cousin whos visiting. because shes "embarrassed to be related" to me. she flicks paint onto my artwork. she manipulates my other little sister into harassing me. and my parents are like "she will grow out of it" "someday youll be best friends like me and my sister" 

it makes me so angry. a lot at myself, because i am weak and stupid and am letting a fucking 12 year old have power over my life. im a stupid ugly freak who has been cursed with the extra extra sensitive type of autism. im an idiot for telling her that im a lesbian. for telling her anything about myself at all, my brain must be filled with air. 


 

Mine is the same way. She’ll be 13 in May so I round up her age, but I feel for you ❤️
Sending support 💕

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