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My mom's bf


Ashybean1 ย  ย 

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I'm bisexual and I know about some of the things that people think of bisexual people. I like to learn about anything LGBTQ+ or women's empowerment. Yeah, I'm only 13 but this type of stuff is important. If you wanna read something interesting about how LGBTQ+ people got their rights, read or look into The Stonewall Riots. Anyways the like two weeks ago my mom's bf called me greedy bc I like both girls and boys. He wants me to label myself as undecided. I don't like that. It made me feel as if he doesn't approve of my sexuality. It has happened a couple times before. When he says this I want to cry. I don't like talking to people on my deep feelings like this. What should I do??

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4 hours ago, Ashybean1 said:

I'm bisexual and I know about some of the things that people think of bisexual people. I like to learn about anything LGBTQ+ or women's empowerment. Yeah, I'm only 13 but this type of stuff is important. If you wanna read something interesting about how LGBTQ+ people got their rights, read or look into The Stonewall Riots. Anyways the like two weeks ago my mom's bf called me greedy bc I like both girls and boys. He wants me to label myself as undecided. I don't like that. It made me feel as if he doesn't approve of my sexuality. It has happened a couple times before. When he says this I want to cry. I don't like talking to people on my deep feelings like this. What should I do??

Heyy @Ashybean1, I am Luie, one of the support mentors with Ditch the Label. I see that you've joined our community just a few weeks ago, welcome, so glad to have you with usย ๐Ÿ˜Š

I do agree with you that these topics are important and I absolutely love how encouraging you are in recommending books which you thin will allow for further awareness and hopefully insight for others.ย  I am sorry to hear that you mothers boyfriend made such an unwanted and unnecessary comment on your choice of sexuality. I can understand how painful it must've been especially listening to him say it multiple times.

Firstly, I hope you do know that you are not being greedy in any way, shape or form if you're attracted to both male and females. As you mentioned you're 13 and are learning more about bisexuality and in general about the LGBTQI+ community as well, Secondly, I do want to highlight that you don't need to keep justifying your choices to him especially when he is putting you down. I know it's hard to brush such things of but your mental peace is what is the most important. I know how putting yourself in a vulnerable spot and talking about deeper feelings can be scary, but you've taken the first step to share about yourself, so glad you have. I wanted to check with you if this something you've shared with your mum as it's comments from her boyfriend and if you have how did that conversation go?ย 

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On 12/17/2022 at 3:48 AM, Luie said:

Heyy @Ashybean1, I am Luie, one of the support mentors with Ditch the Label. I see that you've joined our community just a few weeks ago, welcome, so glad to have you with usย ๐Ÿ˜Š

I do agree with you that these topics are important and I absolutely love how encouraging you are in recommending books which you thin will allow for further awareness and hopefully insight for others.ย  I am sorry to hear that you mothers boyfriend made such an unwanted and unnecessary comment on your choice of sexuality. I can understand how painful it must've been especially listening to him say it multiple times.

Firstly, I hope you do know that you are not being greedy in any way, shape or form if you're attracted to both male and females. As you mentioned you're 13 and are learning more about bisexuality and in general about the LGBTQI+ community as well, Secondly, I do want to highlight that you don't need to keep justifying your choices to him especially when he is putting you down. I know it's hard to brush such things of but your mental peace is what is the most important. I know how putting yourself in a vulnerable spot and talking about deeper feelings can be scary, but you've taken the first step to share about yourself, so glad you have. I wanted to check with you if this something you've shared with your mum as it's comments from her boyfriend and if you have how did that conversation go?ย 

Thank you for saying that. No, I haven't talked to my mom about it.

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16 hours ago, Ashybean1 said:

Thank you for saying that. No, I haven't talked to my mom about it.

How would it feel telling your mum? What her boyfriend said isnโ€™t right. Iโ€™m sorry you went through that hugs

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On 12/19/2022 at 4:34 AM, Leila- said:

How would it feel telling your mum? What her boyfriend said isnโ€™t right. Iโ€™m sorry you went through that hugs

It's kind of hard telling my mom things anyways. I've gotten better at telling her my deeper feelings, not just me being happy or confused and stuff, I'm sure you get what I'm trying to say. I don;t know how it'd feel telling my mom but it'd be hard for me. Thanks for the hugs. :)

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On 12/23/2022 at 8:02 AM, Ashybean1 said:

It's kind of hard telling my mom things anyways. I've gotten better at telling her my deeper feelings, not just me being happy or confused and stuff, I'm sure you get what I'm trying to say. I don;t know how it'd feel telling my mom but it'd be hard for me. Thanks for the hugs. :)

Yes, ofcourse, completely understandable why it's difficult to speak with your mum about this. I was wondering if there are other forms of communication which would ease the conversation with her e.g. a whatsapp message or maybe a handwritten letter? Or is it that currently, you do not want to speak about this with her and just process what is going on?

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