Hi I’m josh and I just found out that I’m bisexual and my dad is a homophobe.

[joshua01]

I was wondering if you guys had any tips for when I should try to come out to my parents and how to do it if you do thank you could you please email me at *********** or just respond to this.

[Monsoon]

Hey Josh,

 

Thanks for coming to us for advice. We can help you

 

I had to remove your email address from the post. This is just a security measure to protect your identity.

 

Anyway... Sorry to hear what you are going through. How are you feeling about this? Coming out can be hard enough, and having a homophobic parent makes it trickier! My dad always used to make homophobic comments and this made me stay in the closet for longer than necessary. When I told him, he eventually stopped making such comments. I now realise that those opinions weren't actually his. They were just a product of his upbringing. This is often the way with homophobia - it can be caused by family situations and religion.

 

When coming out, it is important to be patient. He may react negatively at first, but a lot of parents like this just need time to process the info before they get used to the idea . When coming out to him, it could be useful to do it over message instead of in person. This can take away a lot of fear. Also, it may be a good idea to organise staying with a friend/family member to let it settle down if needs be.

 

Here are some article you may find useful:

 

https://www.ditchthelabel.org/coming-out-homophobic-parents/

 

https://www.ditchthelabel.org/my-parents-didnt-react-well-to-me-coming-out/

 

I hope this advice helps. Speak soon - Monsoon. ... THAT RHYMES!

[joshua01]

Thank you for responding and thanks for the advice