I’m stuck

[Amierosie]

For a good few years now I have been questioning my sexuality and it’s constantly fluctuating I think for a while and Maybye now I have sims internalised homophobia towards myself and it’s making it even more difficult . I’ve done every what’s your sexuality quiz I’ve spent hours looking through all the possible labels I could identify with but how am I meant to know which one I am . I feel like a fake because I don’t have a label I know I feel like I don’t fit I’m not Straight I know that but what am if not I don’t know what to do but I dint have anyone I can ask for help from or talk to . 

[Isla Breezy]

Trust me I know the struggles with finding a label. And it can feel frustrating to find a label to fit you. And having to keep flipping from label to label. Those sexuality quizzes sadly don't solve the problem. Wish I knew that from the beginning lmao. I want to let you know that you don't need to exactly label your sexuality. It can feel very confining in a label. Especially with constant fluctuation like you mentioned. Sometimes it can take you so long to know what fits you. It took me 7 years to settle on one that feels like me. But who knows, that could change. To me sexuality is fluid.

Like for me I really couldn't find a label that consistently felt so I just settled with the Queer label since it's a broad term. Essentially says "I like who I like." Why focus on the gender when personality, interests, etc. are more important in connecting with someone (If that makes sense). People also just label themselves as unlabeled. Remember this, you don't owe anyone a label.

I'm tired while writing this so hope my rambles help in some way. If you have other questions feel free to ask!

[Luie]

15 hours ago, Amierosie said:

For a good few years now I have been questioning my sexuality and it’s constantly fluctuating I think for a while and Maybye now I have sims internalised homophobia towards myself and it’s making it even more difficult . I’ve done every what’s your sexuality quiz I’ve spent hours looking through all the possible labels I could identify with but how am I meant to know which one I am . I feel like a fake because I don’t have a label I know I feel like I don’t fit I’m not Straight I know that but what am if not I don’t know what to do but I dint have anyone I can ask for help from or talk to . 

Heyy @Amierosie, I am Luie, one of the support mentors with Ditch the Label, welcome to our community! I support and advice our members when they reach out, you can even send us a confidential report if you'd prefer more one to one support. Our community is welcoming and supportive and you'll have many others who are going through a similar journey as you or have been through it just like @Isla Breezy has shared so kindly about their journey. You sound like someone who is deeply insightful and I think that is an admirable trait. 

I do want to say that just because you're not able to make a concrete decisions on the label you resonate with right now it does not make you fake, rather you're being true to yourself right now. I understand the importance of labels and how they can be helpful, however, I hope you know that you do not need a label to begin exploring your life, you can always try different things and people (as long as you're safe) and eventually the label might surface for you. It's difficult, but perhaps sitting with yourself and letting yourself know it's okay to not know everything and maybe, having a bit more self compassion..How does this sound to you?