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Body Shaming and Depression


SDH Β  Β 

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It is like everyone has an opinion on my body shape and size and its like my body is not my own. LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!!!!!!!Β 
When I was slim, people were like "oh, you'll die", "are you anorexic?" Now that I put on weight, all the comments I receive are "why not go to the gym?", "are you sure you should be eating, why not diet?"
Its like my body is all that people see, even my family. Anytime I put on a dress, or I try to wear nice things, I am always told to wear big clothes, as my body is too ugly to be in those clothes, or that I am to fat and I have a big belly.Β 
I have tried to ignore all the comments, but it is really difficult to ignore all of them. Now anytime I look at myself in the mirror, I do not see me anymore, but a felony and a crime, like I should not exist in this world anymore.

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  • Ditch the Label Staff

Hey again @SDHΒ πŸ‘‹πŸ»

Daisie here, Ditch the Label’s Community Warden, I will tag our Trained Digital Mentors in so they can reach out to you, if you’d like to get some support and advice?Β @MonsoonΒ & @Aurora

If you need anything in the meantime please just give us a shout. 😊

Β 

Β 

Hello @AuroraΒ and @Monsoon, @DaisieΒ said that I can meet you guys for help

"It is like everyone has an opinion on my body shape and size and it's like my body is not my own.Β LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!!!!!!!Β 
When I was slim, people were like "oh, you'll die", or "are you anorexic?" Now that I put on weight, all the comments I receive are "why not go to the gym?", "Are you sure you should be eating, why not the diet?"
It's like my body is all that people see, even my family. Anytime I put on a dress, or I try to wear nice things, I am always told to wear big clothes, as my body is too ugly to be in those clothes, or that I am to fat and I have a big belly.Β 
I have tried to ignore all the comments, but it is really difficult to ignore them. Now anytime I look at myself in the mirror, I do not see me anymore, but a felony and a crime, like I should not exist in this world anymore.

  • Digital Mentor
1 hour ago, SDH said:

Hello @AuroraΒ and @Monsoon, @DaisieΒ said that I can meet you guys for help

"It is like everyone has an opinion on my body shape and size and it's like my body is not my own.Β LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!!!!!!!!Β 
When I was slim, people were like "oh, you'll die", or "are you anorexic?" Now that I put on weight, all the comments I receive are "why not go to the gym?", "Are you sure you should be eating, why not the diet?"
It's like my body is all that people see, even my family. Anytime I put on a dress, or I try to wear nice things, I am always told to wear big clothes, as my body is too ugly to be in those clothes, or that I am to fat and I have a big belly.Β 
I have tried to ignore all the comments, but it is really difficult to ignore them. Now anytime I look at myself in the mirror, I do not see me anymore, but a felony and a crime, like I should not exist in this world anymore.

Hi there, welcome to the Community. It's great to have you here πŸ™‚. As Daisy kindly mentioned, I'm Aurora and I'm one of the support mentors here and I give advice and support to those who reach out to us.Β 

Thank you for opening up about what's been happening and how this is making you feel. First of all, I'm really sorry to hear that people have been body shaming you and making hurtful comments. As you've quite rightly pointed out, this is your body and it's not OK to be treated like this. I also understand that it's really difficult to ignore the comments. We don't want comments like this to bother us but it's only natural that they do and that they have an impact on how we see ourselves. Would you agree?Β  Do you mind me asking, who has been making these comments? Have you had a chance to speak to them about how this is making you feel?Β 

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Well, some of the comments are made by some outsiders... but those do not really bother me. It's the ones made by friends and family that hurts the most. Like there was this time that my mum bought a body con dress for me, and then I went to test it out. After I wore the dress, she went on and on about how I am fat and I should start a workout and how I cannot go outside with her, and how I have made a beautiful dress ugly. The following day, my dad was like we should check our weights and then after that, he screamed and it became like an everyday thing for me to diet and lose weight.Β 

I also do not know how to talk to them, from what I can remember, my parents expect perfection from me and it is sickening most times, and my putting on some weight, does not add up to them. So, it's next to impossible to talk to them. After all, it's a thing in my house to body shame people, and it's not right.Β 

  • Digital Mentor
11 hours ago, SDH said:

Well, some of the comments are made by some outsiders... but those do not really bother me. It's the ones made by friends and family that hurts the most. Like there was this time that my mum bought a body con dress for me, and then I went to test it out. After I wore the dress, she went on and on about how I am fat and I should start a workout and how I cannot go outside with her, and how I have made a beautiful dress ugly. The following day, my dad was like we should check our weights and then after that, he screamed and it became like an everyday thing for me to diet and lose weight.Β 

I also do not know how to talk to them, from what I can remember, my parents expect perfection from me and it is sickening most times, and my putting on some weight, does not add up to them. So, it's next to impossible to talk to them. After all, it's a thing in my house to body shame people, and it's not right.Β 

That must have been really hurtful to hear. Β And you're absolutely right - that's not OK! Also, you mentioned that your Dad screamed at you and it became an every day thing for you to diet and lose weight. Do you mind telling me a bit more about this? And is it still going on?Β 

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Well, it has reduced, mainly because I do not stay at home a lot. When I am not at home, I am in the hostel. When I get back home, I just avoid them. As I said, it is easy to avoid them and I have almost gotten used to body shaming, so I stopped eating at a point.Β 
What made me vent on this platform is that I posted my mum's picture on my WhatsApp status and my friends and roommates all called me fat, saying that how can I be fatter than my mum?
So, I just needed to vent, that is all.Β Β 

Hey SDH, I see amazing Aurora is giving you support, but wanted to welcome you and say we are here for you! I'm leila, lovely to meet you!

  • Like 2
  • Digital Mentor
20 minutes ago, SDH said:

Well, it has reduced, mainly because I do not stay at home a lot. When I am not at home, I am in the hostel. When I get back home, I just avoid them. As I said, it is easy to avoid them and I have almost gotten used to body shaming, so I stopped eating at a point.Β 
What made me vent on this platform is that I posted my mum's picture on my WhatsApp status and my friends and roommates all called me fat, saying that how can I be fatter than my mum?
So, I just needed to vent, that is all.Β Β 

I can understand why you would like to vent. It's so important to be able to let out how we feel. If you could, what would you like to say to everyone who has been making these comments?Β 

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That people are more than their body shape or size. I believe that I am a good person and I can do a lot of things that are relevant and can also be of great impact. They should stop looking at me like I am a felony and like I have no worth.

  • Yaaas 1
  • Digital Mentor
On 8/31/2022 at 3:08 PM, SDH said:

That people are more than their body shape or size. I believe that I am a good person and I can do a lot of things that are relevant and can also be of great impact. They should stop looking at me like I am a felony and like I have no worth.

Absolutely! I'm really impressed by your positive outlook and you've touched on some really important points here. How would you feel about sharing your thoughts with your any of your friends and your roommates?Β  I think it might be very powerful for them to hear this. Do you think any of them would understand your points and might reconsider how they respond to things in the future?Β Β 

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